And I know I Will Not Last

Cars

2010-07-06T22:20:00.001+01:00

My baby returned from work this evening, he walked on through the door and I knew straight away something was wrong; his smile was not as broad as normal, his eyes we're not so full of life and his face - well he looked like he needed some comfort. I've never seen him like that, that bad, in all time we've been boyfriends; and truth be told my heart kind of fell to the floor because it hurt, I kid you not it hurt so much to see my baby in such a state. Another truth be told is that I felt like crying but I just knew I had to be strong, to comfort and support my baby; I didn't even know what had happened, we'd not even spoke at this stage, it all just whizzed through my mind within the first ten seconds of my baby walking in and shutting the door. I wasn't wrong, unfortunately there was something wrong...............

It had been a bad day at the office, a supercharged full on day - lots of stress, lots of stuff not going to plan and lots of people getting agitated as a result and taking it out on my baby. Not that any of it was my baby's fault (look I'm getting all protective of you baby - don't worry baby I'll tell Blogger World you're the best case manager in the business!) I mean he's the guy that solves peoples problems, orchestrates all the variables and brings them all together as one. If things don't go to plan, it's not because the plan is wrong, it's because a variable is not playing to the same game plan. Whatever, it's my baby that gets it in the neck as a result, fair or unfair that's the nature of game; and it is unfair, even though I am biased it's still unfair; I don't know how anyone could shout or scream at my baby. He normally deals with it so well but today, well it was pretty much non stop for him, it got the better of him, it would for anyone; I couldn't do his job, I'm not that well mentally equipped for it.

Lots of kisses and cuddles followed, I held my baby tight to my chest for so long and it was like a role reversal, it's always been me needing the comfort of my baby and here I was with my baby so fragile in my arms, picking up the pieces and putting them back together again. I told my baby to go get a quick shower, get changed and we'd go out for a walk - tea was officially cancelled; my baby asked where we were going and I told him we were off to find the sun and lose the day. We left the car and we set off walking, no plan or direction, just hand in hand; down St Mary's Way, past The Peel Centre, around Newbridge Lane and up the steps to St. Mary's Church; all the while talking away. We sat on the back wall in the churchyard and looked out onto Newbridge Lane below and the motorway in the distance, watching the World in motion. The cars, the trucks, the vans speeding on by; I turned to my baby and told him I found it all so very romantic, there's an essence of beauty in all the traffic forever passing by. He seemed slightly puzzled by my comment and asked my why, I told him it was because it always means there's someone finding their way home - home to their family, home to their loved ones; there's always someone heading home and always someone looking forward to them coming home. I told my baby it's how I think of him, and I do, each time he's travelling over to see me be it from work, from his flat or from wherever I always think of him in such terms - finding his way back home, a home where he'll always find love. I was going on to some tune about if you could photograph a busy motorway at dusk with the headlights illuminating the growing darkness it could well be the most beautifully understated piece of art ever when I was stopped in my tracks. I guess I was kind of lost in thought but a simple excuse me had me turning to my baby once more and well, I kind of lost my breath, I couldn't have spoken a single word even if I wanted to. Looking back at me was a big smile illuminating my baby's face - a smile I knew so well, a smile I thought that was forever and had kind of broke me when it disappeared had returned.

We didn't find the sun but under darkening skies we found something far more precious, we found my baby's smile; my baby took my hand, thanked me and we kissed. Hand in hand staring out at the cars passing below us, people just driving to the same destination - ultimately heading home...........

For my baby and I - I hope we'll always be like kids on the run; one of the finest songs I've heard in the longest time and it's kind of apt too. I love you baby, your smile means the World xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

How to love

2010-06-08T18:03:00.000+01:00

I should be happy, well I am happy, but I should be happier; my life is blessed, I know it is - I've got a beautiful boyfriend and I'm going away on holiday soon, I'm off to find the sunshine that seems to have disappeared from these fair shores; in short life is real good. But it's the holiday that's the problem, I should be so excited and so happy about it but I'm not because it's tempered with thoughts of being apart from my baby. My baby's not coming with me, for reasons that do not concern you or anyone else he's not coming with me; it doesn't upset me that he's not coming, it's my baby's choice and I respect that, it's just the prospect of being apart for a week - it terrifies me. And I don't use the word terrify over dramatically here boys and girls because it does, it chills me to the core to know we'll be apart, continents apart, for a whole week.

I should be used to this scenario by now, it's way not the first time this has happened, I know that the week will soon pass and I know it won't be as bad as my minds making me believe right now; but still I'll miss him like crazy. There's only certain people I feel comfortable with, only certain people that I share everything with and only certain things that can be shared between boyfriends; and my baby he's all of that and more. I'm not talking about sex either boys and girls, sure I'll miss it but I'll miss the kisses, cuddles and companionship more - I'll just miss him for the guy he is. I don't deal with this kind of stuff well at all and my baby may not be best pleased with me for posting this kind of negative stuff on here but I just need an outlet, somewhere to write my thoughts; and man it's been so long since I last posted on here and I choose a moment like this to break the hiatus - I'm sorry on both accounts, so sorry........

It's been at the back of my mind most of the week but I've kind of kept it there and tried not to think about it, and I was winning the war up until this evening. I phoned up Virgin Mobile to activate roaming on my phone so I could speak to my baby whilst I'm away when I got home this evening and the immediacy of it all just hit me, all these thoughts I've been fighting hard to suppress just came flooding out at once and blew me away. I can no longer pretend that it's not imminent, that the nights we'll be together are closing in on us and the week we'll be apart is looming large because it's staring me right in the face.

I need my baby, I hope he hurries on home from work tonight; I just need a kiss, a cuddle and be told that everything will be alright - I need to be in his arms, I need comforting, I need his security. It's a big ask but my baby deals with this kind of stuff way better than I do; and I don't like asking in my times of need but it's not a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength to admit that things aren't okay, that I need a little help - my baby taught me that; he's taught me lots of things. I wish he could teach how not to miss him so much but I guess that's an impossible ask, besides it's something I don't want to learn anyway - I miss him because I love him and I never want to learn how not to love............

For my baby, so much love xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Foreign legion

2010-05-13T22:29:00.001+01:00

Good evening boys and girls, you may have noticed a new edition to my blog in the form of a twitter feed because well, and this is difficult to say, I've finally decided to come out of the closet and admit that I use twitter; oh my gosh if being gay was not bad enough! Not that I've been keeping it a secret from you, I only started using it on Monday and this is the first real opportunity I've had to announce it to Blogger World. Rest assured this does not mean it's the end of our beautiful relationship on here, I mean how could I, we've been through so much together. You've witnessed me come out as gay; watched me turn from a man-whore into a very happy, very much in love and loved boyfriend; and as a result seen me grow into a more confident, happier and contented gay-boy. We've been through a truck load of stuff, so I'm not about to ditch you in favour of a twitter account; if nothing else it'll be used to compliment this here blog - a reading companion if you will..........

You see my baby, Rach and I talked about this over the weekend; we had all this stuff going on from all the wonderful things we were doing and our days and nights were that packed that we had no time to sit down and write a post. Rach suggested that I try twitter to capture all those moments that would end up otherwise sliding down the wayside; my baby and I dismissed her suggestion because I tried twitter last year for a couple of days and was less than impressed; so unimpressed that I deleted my account completely. I preferred Blogger, I mean I have a lot to say - gosh I can go on for hours, when my baby and I just sit, cuddle and talk our conversations lead to the most extraordinary places. I love that, I guess it's reflected within this blog, particularly so when my baby's with me because a post can lead to places that have no bearing on what the post is actually about; when I'm comfortable and relaxed my mind just wanders free. Still I couldn't get the idea of using twitter out of my mind, my baby and I talked about it again on Sunday night; and after the weekend where we had no time to post it suddenly seemed like a good idea again. As my baby said, it'll be like the first guy I ever had sex with - try it you might just like it; I had no reply to that one barring laughter because it's so true, I mean just look at me now..........

So I signed up Sunday night under the careful supervision of my baby and I kind of forgot about it - if nothing else it was there if I wanted to use it. Monday night found me on the train into Manchester to meet my baby to go and see Kiss; I was stupidly excited and I needed someone to tell. I could use twitter I thought, what a top idea, so I logged on via my mobile phone and the rest is there for you all to see. Hence, I must first apologise to Rach for dismissing her suggestion because twitter is a real handy little tool for those moments when I need to share something but either don't have the time to post on here or I'm not near a computer. I log on with my mobile phone and in a short burst tell whoever wants to know what's on my mind or what we're up to. It's great and it's kind of addictive; I mean I've kept myself in check but I can see it being used for the most inane thoughts that enter my mind, even more so when my baby is with me; and that's another handy feature of twitter.

Between Blogger and twitter it keeps my mind occupied when my baby's not with me; it stops me thinking about how horny I am, how much I need sex and how much I miss my beautiful boyfriend (I appreciate the irony here - it stops me thinking about it as I explain it to you and so think about it!) It doesn't stop me thinking how much I adore him though, I don't think anything could ever stop me from thinking those kind of thoughts. This is the second night without my baby and I need all the help I can get; it feels like I've been conscripted into the foreign legion.........

Crazy nights

2010-05-12T22:32:00.000+01:00

Good evening boys and girls; and before you say it yes I know it's been a while but please rest assured that we've not been ignoring you. We've not found the time to post because we've not really been home the past couple of nights - home has just been a base to come home from work, wash, change, go out, come back and go to bed before doing it all over again. If you think that's kind of rough my baby's had it much worse - he's gone out to work early morning and not come back home until way late at night or early the following morning; no joke! But it's okay, in fact it's more than okay and as you may know it's rare we go out partying on a school night but sometimes there are exceptions to that rule; Monday and Tuesday nights were such exceptions...........

They have been a crazy couple of nights - I've finished work, got home, washed and changed before leaving again to catch a train into Manchester to meet my baby. I feel for my baby because he's got washed and changed at work - he took a wash bag and a change of clothes with him to work Monday morning in preparation for the preceding nights; after speaking to him today and tonight he said it's felt like he's not left work for 48 hours. But he has and neither of us complain because whatever we've been through was worth it, oh my gosh the past two nights have been nothing if not glorious and the fun and enjoyment we've had as a result has been beyond any kind of measure.

Last night we went to see The Big Pink at Manchester Academy, it's the second time we've seen them live in a matter of months; and as ever they were just awesome. One of our favourite albums of 2009 and live they really do bring that kind of industrial sound to life and they seriously rock. There's a real edginess to them too, it's like there's a kind of buzz around them that you can feel, that takes over the crowd and the atmosphere it creates, well that's why we love going to gigs, for the atmosphere. Venues like the Academy especially, kind of small, intimate, standing only gigs create a real special atmosphere; it's hot, it's sweaty, it's crowded and kind of dirty. It's the grass roots of gigs in some respects and maintains the true ethics of live music; feelings that can get lost in vast arenas or open air gigs, such an atmosphere is lost because it doesn't translate well. The Big Pink could and should progress to such arenas; and if they do, well we can say we saw them when they were just starting out, when they played that little old venue called the Academy; all that energy and excitement so close you can almost touch it. The Big Pink would normally be the highlight of the week but on Monday night, we were blown away to different heights altogether; it was a different gig altogether and I appreciate I've just bemoaned the negative aspects of arena gigs but not all bands are the same. Some bands were made for massive arena gigs................

Many months ago I bought two tickets and for many months thereafter I kept it a secret because one of those tickets was part of my baby's birthday present; the other ticket was for me, I mean I wouldn't let my baby go on his own now, I wouldn't be a very good boyfriend if I did because that's what such occasions are for - for experiencing with someone you love. (Oh gosh I've gone all romantic, bless, look what you do to me baby! Love you baby xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox) This being despite the fact that I'm no big fan of the band in question but as my baby is, well come his birthday I just happened to be the best boyfriend in the World; and come Monday night neither of us were really sure what to expect. Neither of us have seen them live before, I don't think they've toured for years and what we didn't realise until we got to the gig and talked to some other fans - the band are like 60 years old now. Have they still got it? Are they past it? Can they still rock and put on a show? We didn't know, but we were both so excited - my baby in particular; oh my gosh his eyes were alight, his smile was never ending and he kept kissing me, cuddling me and wouldn't let go of my hand (which is never, ever a bad thing boys and girls!) But he was so alive with energy, happiness and excitement that it was worth the price of the tickets alone; gosh how I love to see my baby so happy and we were both hoping it was going to be a great gig, maybe me even more so because it was after all for such a special occasion - my baby's Birthday treat, a couple of months late admittedly but you can't always schedule a gig on the day of your boyfriends birthday. I wanted it to be something that he'd never forget...............

We went to see KISS and whatever we were expecting, anticipating and hoping so desperately for, they delivered and went beyond it, they blew us and everyone else packed inside a sold out MEN Arena away. We have never seen another gig like it, we may never see anything like it ever again because they absolutely rocked Manchester to the foundations, forget the MEN Arena, they rocked the whole of Manchester. They just blitzed the City to smithereens, absolutely tore it apart - the costumes, the stage, the set, the fireworks, the special effects, the guitarist flying out over the crowd to a turntable plinth down the far end of the Arena - you just would not believe it because we didn't even believe it ourselves; it honestly took at least 24 hours to appreciate what we had witnessed. I find their music a bit kind of middle of the road but live it rocks, not in a real hard way but in a feel good, sing a long, dance, jump and wave your arms in the air way. We were sat in the lower tier, or should have been, because from the moment they hit the stage we were up dancing, singing, jumping, playing air guitar and punching the air throughout. Which may all sound slightly extreme and out of place, the kind of behaviour that may get you thrown out of such a venue; except for the fact that as far as we could see everyone else was doing the same, the place was absolutely bouncing. Young, old, male, female, straight or gay - it didn't matter because everyone was drawn together as one, to pay homage to rock n roll.

I've seen some serious heavyweights in the music world - Bruce Springsteen, Neil Young, Lou Reed - serious rock royalty; I've always thought I would never see anything more spectacular than the U2 Zoo TV tour which was awe inspiring but I may have to think again. KISS are right up there with them all, something I would never imagine myself saying until after Monday night, but it's true. One things for sure we've never had so much fun at a gig, it was pure, unadulterated fun; such a feel good factor, such a buzz and so life affirming. The Arena, although vast, was absolutely buzzing from start to finish; we've never felt an atmosphere so electric and the noise, dear me; not only were KISS loud but the crowd were screaming and shouting just about every word from every song. And when they played crazy, crazy nights the crowd went absolutely mental singing the chorus back so loud that it sent a shiver down my spine; you looked around and the whole Arena was on their feet, their voices lifting the roof off the place; we've honestly never witnessed anything like it before.

The highlight of my night had nothing to do with the band, the music or the atmosphere; despite it being one of the best. It was the look of absolute joy and happiness on my baby's face, to see the guy I adore having the time of his life with the biggest smile I've ever seen; and he honestly did have the time of his life, we both did, well it was the best feeling in the World, the best night in the World. I'm so blessed to have been able to witness it, to be a part of it and to love you, so very blessed; one hell of a crazy night for all the right reasons xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Shimmer

2010-05-09T21:11:00.002+01:00

We've honestly no idea how to describe the weekend and do any kind of justice to it, just none at all; and there's so many things that we've done that there really is no way we could cover everything. It was just blissful, total and utter bliss from start to finish; and in particular from when we hooked up with Rach just before midday on Saturday. I don't think any of us have had so much fun and laughter - decent, honest and innocent fun and laughter; none of us had any other motive than to make each other happy. Oh gosh, we're just three regular people - two guys in love and a girl who loves to see my baby and I in love; a girl and a guy who are two of my best friends, who are best friends with each other and when you put us all together, well it's nothing short of magical.

These are the moments we can't describe but will stay with us for a real long time - they're imprinted in our smiles, they make our eyes shine and they make our hearts love. This song is our weekend, it's us...............

Threesome

2010-05-08T11:17:00.000+01:00

Top of the morning boys and girls, we hope you're all happy and well; come on it's the weekend! I'm so excited, we're both so excited but I get kind of giddy and silly with it, whereas my baby he's way more level headed; we've both been looking forward to this point most of the week and all the planning has come together just perfectly. For the past couple of days it's been in all our conversations or text messages, it's always been there in our thoughts and it's made us both so happy - or should that read it's made us all so happy? Because there's more than two of us, or there will be shortly; you see for the rest of the weekend we'll be enjoying a threesome - that's right you read it correctly and it's not a typo a THREESOME! And that's why I'm giddy with excitement boys and girls, oh my gosh...............

Now a word of warning before we continue because we both know some of our readers have got very dirty minds and read more into a situation than there actually is - yes we know who you are and one in particular should be ashamed of himself; although that said my baby and I both think you've got a nice body, all of it! We should post the photos and really put you to shame but then again they're probably all over the internet already; and we doubt it would bring shame anyway! So a threesome but it's not what you're probably thinking boys and girls - I've not ground my baby down by my constant requests to get spit roasted, in fact I've stopped asking, I've not asked for the longest time because I've no need to ask. I love my baby, my baby loves me and our sex life continues to be fantastic; there's no need for anyone else and I don't want anyone else other than my baby - I love him and no one else. Besides I don't think my body could take any more pleasure, or pain come to think of it - I woke up with a pain in the neck this morning and I don't think it's got anything to do with sleeping funny. But it has got everything to do with my baby working me over to some tune last night, dear me he shagged me in just about every position you could think of and he did it hard. He's either banged my spine out of alignment (that's so gross I know, and funny, and the truth; it's not the truth - sorry) or it's due to the fact that my head was crushed into the headboard at one point during last nights manoeuvres whilst my baby was in some kind of sexual frenzy! Whatever, I don't care because it was worth it, is getting laid by someone you love to bits the best experience in the World? It's a rhetorical question boys and girls, for we already know the answer.

So I woke up this morning with a stiff and painful neck but it wasn't that painful and it wasn't the only thing that was stiff (oh gosh that is funny and this time very much the truth); my baby woke me up when he went to answer the call of nature at around about half past eight this morning. I looked at the clock (obviously - that's why I knew what the time was), I listened to him relieving himself, I watched him return to the bedroom as naked as the day he was born and the sight of his cock got me horny. My baby wished me a good morning and apologised for waking me up before getting back into bed; he gave me a kiss, I kissed him back and told him I was horny before my hand disappeared South - morning sex is just divine, the best way to start any day..............

We've had breakfast, drank coffee and eased ourselves into the day; we've packed our bags and as soon as we finish this post, if we ever do because of my meanderings, we'll be leaving for my baby's flat - we're relocating for the weekend. Not only that but we won't be alone for the weekend either, we're spending it all with Rach; hence the threesome and why you've all got very dirty minds because as the name suggests and if you're a regular reader you'll appreciate that Rach is a girl. My baby's girlfriend to be exact and a dearly loved friend to me; just one of the most loveliest friends anyone could ever hope to have, Rach keeps my baby company and looks after him when we can't be together, she's a star! We always say and we always promise that we should all get together more often than we do; and we always fail miserably and it's a shame because we all have great fun when we do seize the opportunity. We've not failed this weekend because we'll be together throughout - we're taking Rach to the Trafford Centre today, it's her Brothers Birthday next week; and despite him being straight well my baby and I were asked to help out on the Birthday gift hunt. Apparently he probably wouldn't appreciate PVC hot pants and some make up - I just don't understand straight guys, such a strange breed! Only joking, my baby and I have got some good taste, so I'm sure between us all we'll find something to make Birthday boy very happy. I'm sure we'll have plenty of time to go shopping for ourselves too and we can go girly shopping too with Rach, how I adore girly shopping!

Tonight we'll be staying in, it's going to be one of our famous slouchy nights - take out food, alcohol, a couple of dvd's and lots of fun and laughter. Rach is staying over at my baby's flat, she normally goes home but tonight there'll be no worries about getting home so she can get as drunk as my baby and me. Tomorrow we're all going to go out together too, we don't know where yet, our plans haven't stretched that far - we'll see what time we get up, how we feel and what the weather's like. But that's all ahead of us, one step at a time boys and girls but it's the reason we've all so been looking forward to this weekend. Good friends make good times boys and girls, this weekend will be no exception to that rule............

If we find the time or have the inkling we may post again from my baby's flat but until then we wish you all a weekend filled with fun, laughter, smiles and love. Go make some happy memories boys and girls, it cheers the World; with love xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

Alstroemeria

2010-05-06T20:54:00.000+01:00

Good evening boys and girls, we were going to post last night but we didn't get round to it because there was a problem, nothing major - there's nothing to worry yourselves over, in fact you probably couldn't class it as a problem at all. You see I fell asleep in my baby's arms on the sofa, I was kind of tired and we were lay together on the sofa, cuddled up and listening to music; it wasn't my intention to fall asleep but I did. I guess it was because I just felt so safe, so warm, so secure and so loved in my baby's arms that I drifted off, I didn't even remember the heavy eyed bit - where you're eyes are so heavy you can't keep them open, I must have just gone. I felt kind of guilty when I woke up because it's no way to spend an evening with my baby is it? To fall asleep in his arms? Not that he minded or complained, to the contrary in fact, he told me that it meant so much and he also felt so relaxed holding, cuddling and watching me whilst I slept; I asked my baby how long I'd been out for and I was gone for just over an hour, and there was my baby he didn't move or disturb me, he cuddled me throughout. It says so much and I don't know but I got kind of emotional when my baby told me he cuddled and watched over me whilst I slept, yes - it says so very much...............

But hey we're back now and I'm feeling anything but tired, I'm feeling kind of horny to be honest and my baby's just said that's nothing new, which I assume means you think I get too much sex? Lest we forget that you're my boyfriend, a beautiful, cute, sexy and loving boyfriend may I say, so if I get too much sex what does that say about you, um I wonder? My baby's says he's very lucky to have found a boyfriend as horny as he is, that's what! I guess it's a polite way of putting it and if noting else it is the truth. Or is it? You see I think the reason I was feeling so tired yesterday was the fact that I'm not getting enough protein in my diet, we discussed this last night when I woke up. My baby thought I was being serious when I mentioned it until I said the lack of protein must mean he's not shagging me enough; he asked an open question about how much cock does one guy need before pushing a cushion in my face. The answer came later, literally, it's only one and quite a tasty big one it is too! If I wasn't tired before I was shagged out afterwards, once again quite literally, oh my gosh, we both slept well last night........

We had a magical text exchange through the day today, discussing our plans for the weekend and oh gosh it left me so excited at the prospect; I had such a warm, fuzzy feeling inside for the remainder of the day. I told my baby how it made me feel when he got home tonight and he said pretty much the same thing - it left him being unable to wait for tomorrow evening when work ends and the weekend begins. It does sound so special, not that we're planning on doing anything extraordinary or different, there's a subtle change that's all; but still it fills our hearts with happiness and that's a very good feeling to have. It makes my baby smile and that's just the finest vision in the World because that makes not one but two very happy, smiley boyfriends; here's to all the happy, smiley boyfriends in the World. Go tell your boyfriend you love him, make him smile - I love you baby xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox. It works, trust me it works and it works both ways too!

I did the honest thing this evening, the only thing a gay-boy in love with his boyfriend could do, (well not the only thing but you know) I bought my baby some more flowers. His tulips had seen much better days and to be honest they weren't exactly as we'd have hoped for, or certainly as I hoped for when I bought them. They weren't exactly the most beautiful flowers in the World, they looked like they had such promise when I bought them and sure they lasted for nigh on two weeks but they didn't really capture the imagination; but still we live and learn. Anyway we hope my baby's latest flowers fare better, I mean they sound awesome, isn't buying or receiving flowers an education in itself? We can't even pronounce the name of them, but as soon as I saw them I thought they look different, then I read the description and I knew they were the ones. They're called Alstroemeria and the description reads - native to South America the Peruvian lilies flourish in the cool mountainous regions of the Andes. Originally introduced to Europe in 1754 these long pasting flowers come in a range of vibrant colours. Don't they just sound so exotic? My baby adores them, he was taken aback by the leaf formation on them, masses of dark green angular leaves with a flash of colour from the flower head; and even though the heads have yet to open the contrast between the flower and the leaves looks extraordinary. Oh my gosh, he seriously enjoyed preparing and arranging them in the vase; and as ever it took my breath away watching him take so much care, so much time and give them so much love whilst doing so. He's done a stellar job with them and they do look awesomely beautiful arranged in the vase; and the smile on my baby's face after he'd finished and stood back to admire them - there are no words to describe it or do it justice, none at all.

Carrots

2010-05-04T20:15:00.000+01:00

I said last night how the Bank Holiday hadn't messed up the week in my head as they normally do - a Bank Holiday Monday normally puts me a day behind because they feel like Sundays to me; you know the score so I won't go on any more about it but if you don't know the score then read last nights post for goodness sake! On second thoughts don't, well do because it was a beautiful post and that's not self praise, that's my baby who said so and as he knows me kind of well, or intimately truth be told, I guess it's kind of true. Actually there's no kind of to it, even I'll admit it's a beautiful post and it was a reflection of the day and the people that made it beautiful, such people remain beautiful in their own right - one such person sat right by my side is the most beautiful guy I've ever had in my life; I love you baby xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

So read last nights post but don't pay too much attention to the Bank Holiday not messing up my week bit because it appears I spoke too soon; in hindsight it may have messed up my week to some serious tune because today felt like Friday and not just any old Friday but like a Friday before I've got a weekend off to look forward to with my baby. Seriously, I'm sure we all know how it feels to have the buzzing inside and the extra spring in your step when you get to Friday and you've got the weekend to party away after a week of work. That's how I've felt, I mean it normally makes me all giddy and mischievous - that's exactly how I've been, gosh I've had such great fun - silly, stupid, mischievous fun and it all started quite innocuously. I sent my baby a text telling him amongst other things that I'd be popping into Sainsburys on my way home and would he like me to get him anything whilst I was there. He texted me back a while later and asked me to go to the in store butcher and ask for a spit roast - my baby fancied a spit roast for tea, I was sat alone in the canteen in fits of laughter - it was so left field, so unexpected and so funny; it descended into the depths of mischievousness and silliness from there...........

Over the course of the day we talked about such diverse subjects as Bear Grylls, being called Ken, fat people and guys with ginger pubes; don't ask because we won't be able to print a great deal regarding any of it. But have you ever seen a guy with ginger pubes? Neither my baby or I have been with a guy with ginger pubes, ginger hair is kind of okay; I mean I've seen a few guys with ginger hair that I've quite fancied in my time but I've never gone to bed with them. My baby's making gagging noises because he says guys with ginger hair simply make him gag and not in a good way - it's a joke boys and girls don't write in to complain, it's honestly a joke; it's funny though it has to be said! So we searched the internet earlier to find photos of guys with ginger pubes; oh my gosh it's not a good look, can you ever imagine going down on a guy with ginger pubes? A big bush of wiry ginger looking you in the eye, it's like hang on a minute let me put my sunglasses on love, your pubes are blinding me (my baby's gone, oh dear he almost fell off the sofa, that's just top quality, so funny and so wrong all at the same time!) It's just got worse or better or whatever way you want to look at it - my baby's just said I bet their cum tastes of carrots; holy crap batman that is the most funniest comment in the World, oh my gosh that's beyond just about anything ever. My baby's crying with laughter, oh dear, I so need to swear to put it into some kind of context because it's just so fu?*ing funny!

We're sorry, we hope we've not offended anyone, neither of us are prejudice in any way, shape or form; I mean we know more than most how it can feel to be cast as different because we're gay. But we laugh at ourselves and we can take a good natured joke regarding our sexuality too; our humour is meant in good nature, you should never take yourself too seriously boys and girls. Back to the texts............

Come late afternoon girlfriend got in on the act, well she didn't really she just picked a bad time if she wanted a straight reply. She simply enquired how I was and it somehow found it's way to shoes that come in matchboxes, spanking, if she was a guy I'd let her shag me, a whole host of flirting on my part and ended, thanks to inspiration from my baby, by asking her if she fancied a spit roast for tea. I bet she was real glad she asked if I was okay, but that's what girlfriends are for, to flirt with; although she never got back to me regarding tea, I guess that's a bridge too far. If nothing else I think I cheered her up some, which is good because that's what friends do, they look out for each other and pick them up when they're down; I hope I helped, we love you girlfriend xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

It's been a great day, filled with fun, laughter and silliness; and somehow, somewhere along the way we helped someone out too. Maybe last nights post wasn't so wrong after all, smile and the World smiles with you.............

Smile.....

2010-05-03T22:26:00.000+01:00

...... and the World smiles with you - there's never been a truer sentence spoken or more to the point sometimes the World just makes you smile, today it's certainly made me smile because it's been filled with pure innocence and utter beauty. I didn't witness it first hand but I know it's the truth, I just know.........

Another Bank Holiday Monday found me back at work, somethings never change in that respect, meanwhile my baby has enjoyed a long weekend - he's been off today and has only got a short working week of four days before he's off again. Which is kind of handy, well awesomely perfect truth be told because I'm off again this weekend too, happy days boys and girls; only four days to go, four days of early shifts for me, so we should be together every night this week and all weekend to boot. But if there was any consolation of having to get up early this morning to go to work leaving my baby asleep in bed and leaving him for the remainder of the day it was just the fact that I could witness him asleep in bed. I appreciate I've mentioned this on at least one other occasion but it's worth mentioning again; he is just so beautiful whilst he's asleep, oh my gosh - so cute, so fragile and like an image of absolute purity. I kid you not, I've never seen another guy look like that whilst asleep ever, in fact I've never seen anyone or anything that looks like that whilst asleep period. It crushes my heart each and every time; there's so much beauty that lights up the bedroom and I look upon him in silence, I study my baby and I get lost in the moment. He's beautiful - my beautiful, sleep head baby, I love you so much, you've no idea how absolutely gorgeous you are, even when you're asleep you are nothing but gorgeous, sexy and cute xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

My day was a usual Bank Holiday Monday, it felt like a Sunday, just in the tone and nature of the day and they normally tend to me throw me some because I do kind of lose a day in my mind; I do think the Monday is the Sunday, the Tuesday is the Monday and so on but today I didn't. Perhaps it's because I'd just had the weekend off so it was clear in my mind, today is Monday - a non eventful Bank Holiday; and then the World just kind of lit up. I was texting my baby over breakfast, just sending mostly silly texts back and to; and mostly concerning how utterly gorgeous he looks whilst he's asleep. That and the cold, dear me it was so cold today, the wind seriously cut through you; I warned my baby to wrap up real warm when he was ready to head out. He texted back to tell me he already knew it was cold outside because he'd done some washing and had hung it out; he's such a sweetheart, I didn't ask him to do any washing or anything but he did it anyway - he told me he had to use all the pegs to prevent the washing from blowing away in the wind, bless him. Our text exchange was interrupted by my Mum phoning me, my folks were heading out for the day to Fleetwood, to do a bit of shopping and to get some sea air and she sounded so enthused by the prospect. It illuminated me, to get some sea air, it just kind of made a connection deep inside; I absolutely adore British coast resorts out of season, there's just something so melancholic about them - the cold, the grey, the damp and the emptiness; I appreciate it all sounds real sad and not much fun but it does speak to me. And to stand on a windswept, deserted promenade with the wind and sea spray pummelling your face whilst watching the sea crash onto the shore; it just engages all my senses at once, I guess it makes me feel so close to nature, oh man, all that sea air...........

My baby and I have been talking about this this evening; it's something I miss even though it's rare I get to experience it barring when I head out to see the folks, so it's never at the forefront of my thoughts but when something triggers it. My baby he just sat and listened to me as I went on to some tune about it; gosh I do get very lyrical and poetic over such things and I take it for granted that everyone feels the same kind of connection or can see the arresting beauty within the apparent melancholy. I don't expect everyone to think in the same terms but surely because it's so vivid in my soul then it must affect everyone who's been touched by it - it's not. My baby told me I was beautiful after I'd finished, I thought his silence meant he didn't really grasp the interest but it did, he just didn't want to speak or ruin the moment. I just take it for granted that because I feel something so strong even if it is very subtle then we all must feel it, I guess I'm wrong; my baby said, as he's said many times before, I'm sensitive and it's a special gift; and it's special for him to be around someone like that, someone like me. My baby's just reiterated this fact so who am I to say any different, particularly when reiteration comes with kisses and cuddles..........

My baby's day was already planned he was taking his Mum for a walk around the shops and for lunch in Wilmslow; we talked about it last night and once again it just struck me right in the heart. It's just so sweet, my baby taking his Mum shopping and for lunch, it lights up my soul; just the unconditional love between Mother and Son; and just doing it for no other reason than because. Because my baby loves his Mum and because it's not everyday they get to spend some quality time together; besides my baby loves shopping. I guess once again it's the beauty in the unspoken detail, its silence speaks to me in volumes, whilst talking about it last night it just blew me away; I was just so happy for my baby to be able to look forward to something like it and that he gained so much joy from the prospect. I finished my text exchange with my baby by wishing him a great day and sending him enough kisses and cuddles to last until I saw him again before I headed back to work.

Come lunch time, I found my baby had texted me to say they were having a fantastic day and he wished that I was with them. They'd taken lunch in a coffee shop called Rise and sat over freshly made sandwiches, coffee and scones; it sounded perfect, I texted my baby back and pleaded with him to tell me they had a window seat. My baby knows my love of window seats, whenever we go out for a meal or have lunch whilst we're out and about I always try and get a table by the window because I love people watching. Some of the best times we spend together are those spent chatting over coffee whilst looking out onto the World; the very best times are those spent doing it on a rainy day in Manchester. Sat warm and dry with a hot coffee whilst looking out onto the grey, rainy streets; oh my gosh it's poetry, pure poetry. My baby texted back shortly afterwards, they had a window seat, he thought of me and got a window seat; I sat there and smiled..........

Just before heading home my Mum phoned again, if she was enthused at the prospect of her day out then it lived up to and beyond expectation. As she was telling me about her day I could hear the sunshine in her voice, she sounded so happy and so pleased with the day - they'd been to Fleetwood, onwards to Freeport and then into Blackpool. They'd bought stuff in the Marks & Spencer outlet, the Regatta outlet, met friends along the way and all took lunch together in Uncle Toms Cabin. It was the happiness that struck me, it blew me away; it sounded like such a wonderful day - a day that had promised much and delivered even more. A day that just got better for me when I got home because my baby was waiting for me with a smile, a kiss and a cuddle. I got washed and changed before sitting down with my baby over coffee whilst he told me about his day; there was sunshine and happiness in his voice too, and a smile to match.

I'd not been anywhere apart from work and I'd not done anything as exciting as those that had touched me today but they touched me all the same. They touched me with their happiness and touched me with their love for thinking of me, sharing their days with me and ultimately making me a part of their day. My baby was not alone whilst he was smiling, it's been a desperately beautiful day, a day the World smiled with us all..........

Pornstar

2010-05-02T22:18:00.000+01:00

We went shopping into Manchester on Saturday and bought lots of lovely things, my baby bought a pair of pink and blue checked shorts which are just divine, awesomely beautiful; a new shirt and I bought him a new pair of pants. I got an awesome t-shirt, just the funniest t-shirt we've ever seen and so apt; and my baby bought me another t-shirt which had him in bits with laughter when he saw it and once again is allegedly so apt for me, my baby had to buy it me! We'll post some photos some time and you'll be able to judge for yourself, they're both very funny to be honest and I can understand why my baby felt compelled to buy it me.

That aside we also found ourselves in a sex shop, we were just in there browsing and being very well behaved for a change, well that was until I happened upon (I almost wrote came upon, that would have opened up a real can of worms wouldn't it. A gay-boy was arrested in Manchester on Saturday for masturbating whilst in a sex shop, oh my gosh front page headline on the Manchester Evening News!) a dvd - a gay porn dvd, for obvious reasons - we're gay and it's a sex shop! My baby was looking at the toy section at the time trying to find something humongous to split me in two as is his want (that's a joke boys and girls, well kind of, naughty boyfriend......) so he wasn't by my side but it didn't stop him hearing me. Because I burst out laughing, whilst looking at the cover of the dvd, so much so that my baby walked on over to see what was so funny. As he approached I asked him, is this you whilst showing him the cover of the dvd because the guy on the cover kind of looked vaguely like my baby, (point of caution here boys and girls - whenever I say someone looks like someone else, I always make such judgements in the vaguest ways possible and in reality they look nothing like my reference point) you never told me you were a pornstar and look at all the guys you've been shagging. You see the dvd was about a guy called Jason who gets kidnapped and shagged by four guys, one after the other (lucky bastard) before they all cum in his face (I'm proper jealous now, he'd have got paid for that too, isn't that just the best job in the World). Now my baby's not called Jason and he's not a bottom either and to be honest he doesn't really look anything like the guy on the cover, my baby's way more cute and sexy but I kind of made a similarity somehow; oh and my baby's never done porn either which is crazy because he can shag like the best of them. But still regardless of all that it's the nearest guy I've seen that looks like my baby in a porn movie, hence my point.

My baby confirmed it looked nothing like him but said it reminded him more of me even though the guy looked even less like me because Jason sounded like a man whore and it would be something I'd do given the chance. As you may guess from my earlier comments, my baby's not wrong, in fact it's the kind of crazy stuff we talk about occasionally; oh my gosh I'd love to get gang banged, seriously, to get shagged by a gang of men and have them all cum in my face - that's like dreamland. As my baby said it's man whore territory but I don't care, call me what you want; not that I'd ever do it, not whilst I'm with my baby anyway but a gay-boy can dream. I ended up buying the dvd, it was only £15.00, we've not got round to watching it yet but it does sound proper horny. So this is not my baby, he's not officially a pornstar (note careful placement of fingers to keep the scene clean)

But these are my baby's new pants, the ones I bought him yesterday, a pair of grey floral Bjorn Borg with a pink waistband, aren't they just divine? And don't they fit him so well? Or more to the point doesn't he fit them so well? It may be unofficial but in my eyes and in my bed my baby is most definitely a pornstar

I love you baby, you make me horny xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Sorry

2010-05-02T19:54:00.001+01:00

Good evening boys and girls, where've you all been? Here's my baby and I enjoying a fantastic weekend after spending most of the week apart and you're nowhere to be seen; oh gosh all the fun and laughter you've missed out on, it's your loss! That's the first apology out of the way then, admittedly I turned it around to make it look like anyones fault but ours, it worked though didn't it? Yes, we've neglected you again Blogger friends, instead of giving you some of our time we've concentrated all our time solely on each other and left you out of the loop, but that's the deal sometimes, we're not under contract to post everything we do every single day. Besides, sometimes we don't have the urge to post, despite lots happening this weekend and having lots to talk about, there was just no desire to post. This weekend we enjoyed every second and we just kind of let it wash over us and wash away any cares we may have had; as a result we've been so relaxed all weekend, we've not really thought about anything other than the moment at hand; it's been beautiful, just so carefree and well, the blog didn't even come to mind until this evening.

It's a suitably relaxed Sunday evening, we've settled down for the night after a weekend of top fun, I'm lay in my baby's arms on the sofa and he's cuddling me whilst peering over my shoulder whilst we write to you. My baby's just said it's a proper Sunday evening because it feels just like a Sunday evening, the calm after the storm, and he remembers how I used to do this lots when we first kind of started going together but before we became boyfriends - that's some memory baby and it's so true. I'm just thinking back now, as I write and it is exactly the same feeling, my baby would head back to his flat after a weekend together and I'd sit and talk to you boys and girls about how good it was and how great it made me feel. These days we talk to you together and those weekends together have kind of merged into every day and night we get chance; but that feeling never fades and the times we spend together are still as good, if not better and my baby always makes me great - he makes me feel like the only boyfriend in the World..... Oh gosh, the emotion hit me out of nowhere then, as soon as I started typing the last sentence the tears welled up in my eyes; but it's true my baby makes me feel like the only boyfriend in the World - I love you so much baby xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

The real reason I want to say sorry is because some of you, or quite a lot of you - if I've got your mobile number may have received a strange text from me Friday evening. You see I sent a fair few people a photo of the new toaster I bought, I was kind of excited about the fact to be honest and I needed to tell someone. At first I just told my baby, I sent him the photo and told him what a bargain it was - £12.00 for a four slice, all singing, all dancing toaster; maybe I went a little over the top because my baby although happy for me didn't kind of get the need to be excited over it. However he did dare me to send the photo to everyone else in my contacts, well most of them, I mean the bank, doctors, dentist and a select few others probably wouldn't appreciate it at all; so I did, I mean a dare's a dare. My baby couldn't believe it when I got home and showed him who I'd sent it to, we were both in absolute bits through laughter; and some of those who I sent it to obviously didn't believe it either. I got some strange replies, a fair few siding with my baby, like what's the big deal - it's a four slice toaster and it cost £12.oo, WOW! Some thought I'd lost the plot, some thought I needed to get a life (I've got a wonderful life thank you very much, I wouldn't swap it for anything and as long as my baby is a part of it then my life is perfect) and one person probably called it correctly, it was Rach. She said it sounded like I'd spent too much time apart from my baby and it was a good job we'd be back together that night - it worries her when I start sending normal photo's like toasters instead of my baby and I in various stages of undress or various states of drunkenness or mischief because she knows something is wrong! It is quite a true statement to be honest, Rach receives lots of crazy photos from us, me in particular; and it's very rare that we send her anything that could be deemed as normal. We made up for it this weekend, normal service resumed and amongst other things she received a photo of my baby's new pants with him in them! She replied by saying she wasn't shocked because she's seen my baby in his pants and less on numerous occasions - it shocked me! Like what? It didn't really, my drama queen moment was negated by Rach ending the text by saying and before you start remember I've seen you au natural too sexy pants! If nothing else Rach knows me too well, in more ways than one - though not in that way, I mean we both love her to bits but not in that way (my baby's finding this hole I'm relentlessly digging for myself very funny, it really has tickled him and he's telling me to just say it how it is!) Okay, so Rach has seen a couple of gay-boys naked, that's all I'm trying to say - she's a very lucky girl, barring the fact that there's all that cock and none of it for her! Oh gosh, that's the funniest thing ever, if my baby was tickled before he's just been in bits, we've both been in bits - it was another dare, I said the none of it for her bit out loud, it was never meant to go in the post until my baby dared me; oh man what top quality, that's just proper funny. We're going to get battered the next time we see Rach, my baby's said he's never going back to his flat he's going to stay here forever and the worst part of it? We've arranged to meet up with Rach next weekend, she can batter us both at the same time; my baby's doing a top impersonation of Rach - in a girly voice he said, I'll castrate the pair of you then you know how I feel! OH MY GOSH, that's just the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life, hand on heart that was top drawer funny, oh dear, excuse us a minute......... We're sorry Rach, if you're reading this at any point, we're very sorry; it's just a joke - please, please, pretty please don't castrate us, we love you.

Anyway the toaster worked fantastically well, four slices at once with dual browning control so my baby can have his toast slightly darker than mine; it really did make breakfast so much easier and made it taste so much better...............

Tomorrow

2010-04-29T23:19:00.001+01:00

Good evening boys and girls, I'm so happy to report today has been a much better day - a much, much better day; and I'm happiest for my baby because he's the one that always helps me through, be it through good or bad times and whether he's with me or not he always helps. So today is for him, the smiles and the happiness I've felt inside are all because of and for him; it's been a great day, much more like normal, regardless of the late shift and regardless of the fact that my baby and I are apart again as a result, I'm happy, my baby's happy, we're both happy.

It's shown too, my baby and I have been flirting all day by text, we've made each other laugh so much. I've learned that my baby likes my bed more than his own because he doesn't need to do any laundry - honestly my baby sent me that; and then he made amends by sending another text with the real reason why he likes my bed more than his, ending it by saying the more washing of bed linen the better. You may guess the rest, although it doesn't take much guessing and I know exactly what he means; the next text had me in absolute bits - he said his colleagues were pleading with me not to work late shifts any more because they've noticed he's been walking around gingerly today. Apparently my baby has a bad back from all the extra weight he's been carrying because he's that full and they haven't been emptied since Monday - in other words the lack of sex and the build up of cum as a result. This I could quite well believe because he does produce a lot, oh my gosh litres of the stuff and I replied by saying I hope it's true because I couldn't wait to feel him dump the mother of all loads in me tomorrow night. Damn, how I love his cum, in me or on me, I absolutely adore it - it's so beautiful, so loving and so dirty all at the same time; I look upon it as a sign of our love because that's what it is, you may think what you want but I honestly do believe it's such a loving experience wherever it lands!

We've missed each other and we're both so horny as a result; that's it in a nutshell and those nuts are going to be cracked open tomorrow boys and girls, you can put your mortgage, your life savings and even your life on that - it's such a certainty. Just one more day of work and that's it, the weekend starts, I've got a buzzing inside; tomorrows going to be a great day regardless of whatever happens, it could be the crappiest day known to man and I won't care, I've got one eye firmly on the weekend and nothing is going to dampen my spirits from here on in. I got paid yesterday, my baby gets paid tomorrow; we'll have time, we'll have nothing to get in the way and we'll have each other, there's nothing in this World that can stop us from having fun. Not even the weather, the forecast is terrible, it's going to rain, it's going to turn colder and when I spoke to my baby earlier he said it's the best possible weather for the weekend, which kind of threw me admittedly. Until he explained that it's the perfect excuse for him to cuddle up close to me even more, so we can keep each other warm; and you know what? I can live with that, I can live with that so happily - so bring on the rain and bring on the cold because it brings lots and lots of cuddles, I've missed my cuddles so much.

I was in Marks & Spencer's this afternoon, stocking up on provisions for the weekend, the fridge has looked so empty this week but tonight it's looking full again. Shopping for two is so much more fun than shopping for one, shopping for my baby and I makes me smile, how I enjoyed carrying the shopping bags home this evening................

Without saying anything at all

2010-04-28T23:16:00.000+01:00

Late shifts lived up to their reputation today, I don't know why but it always seems whenever I work late shifts my days are always haunted, someone or something always spoils my day. It's like their cursed or something, if being apart from my baby isn't bad enough then there's a double whammy, it's beyond any kind of circumstance, it always happens; and I guess I should be used to it by now as a result but I'm not, I mean my baby has had a positive effect on my life because I do think more positively these days, I always try to think the best; besides who likes to have their day fractured?

It was going so well too, the morning and early afternoon sauntered along in smiles and happy thoughts; then come late afternoon the day hit a brick wall - nothing major admittedly but enough to throw me off track. Enough to blight my day, enough to wipe the smile from my face for a while and enough to have to phone my baby up for some comfort and support. My baby's so kind and helpful, I was feeling kind of upset but he never takes umbrage with me, he always gives me time and helps to put my mind at ease. I don't know but he just knows me, he knows I get upset easily and more often than not it's small, silly things that do it; he knows I need lots of care and attention, and yet he still loves me regardless. That's a very big marker to judge by, it says many things without saying anything at all..............

We just talked and talked, all the while drifting away from work and drifting towards a different, more happier place. My baby told me how he cooked for Rach last night, I sent him a text yesterday evening telling him not to waste such a glorious evening and he didn't; he spent it with Rach and by the sound of it they had a ball, as always they don't see each other as often as they should; man we don't see each other as often as we should. I spoke to them both tonight and we talked about it, as we always do - we never get together enough; we always talk about it but I don't know it just doesn't happen as often as we'd like. We've got a couple of weekends off together coming up, we're going to put that right at some stage; it's going to happen, all three of us promised. Rach cooked for my baby tonight, she returned the favour, I think my baby is one of the most loved and well looked after guys; and he deserves it, he never, ever takes such for granted and well, he loves and takes such good care of those close to him too. My heart smiled when my baby talked so vividly of their evening together, he paints pictures with his words, it was like I was with them and I could hear the sunshine in his voice. Rach loves my baby's flowers, he showed her the photos I've been sending to him for the past two nights; Rach is jealous of him too because a guy hasn't bought her flowers in the longest time, a fact my baby was only too willing to play upon; he's a mischievous boyfriend at times, I've no idea where he gets it from!

I was in Boots just before lunch, just before my day went kind of wrong and I noticed some of the photo frames were on sale and also on buy one get one free. I picked up four mock brown leather frames and when I got home I did something I've been promising myself I'd do for the longest time. I framed up four of the best photos of my baby and I; two for me and two for my baby, I printed some off a while ago and it was always at the back of the mind, today I got around to it. They look gorgeous all framed up, we look gorgeous all framed up - it was a secret I'd been keeping from my baby, a secret until tonight, I was planning to keep it as a surprise until my baby was back with me but I couldn't help myself, I had to let him know. He can't wait to see them and he can't wait to show Rach; memories, our memories captured and framed forever. It's funny what you remember, it's funny what you can't forget..............

Moon falling

2010-04-27T21:46:00.001+01:00

I was hurting today boys and girls not in a physical sense but in an emotional sense, you see I started my late shifts today and remain on them for the rest of the week; and as comes with working late it means my baby and I are apart, and we'll probably remain that way until Friday, until weekend. I know at the very least I've got something to work towards, something to look forward to because we'll have all weekend together and to be honest I was doing so well.......

Late starts usually make me grouchy, not only because I know my baby and I will be apart, but also because by the time I get to work everyone else is in and the day's in full swing; there's normally no time for me to ease gently into the day, I need to ease gently into the day regardless of the time, I'm very, very delicate at that time! This morning though was cool, I had the time to ease gently into the swing of things and to find my feet, I couldn't believe my luck to be honest and it saw me in a good mood for the majority of the day. I say majority because my working day didn't end in the same vain unfortunately, no one upset me and nothing went wrong, in fact I wasn't really upset at all but I was hurting inside. You see come late afternoon the weather brightened up a treat, the clouds cleared, the sun shone and it really did get rather warm - it was a beautiful late afternoon, come early evening. I headed upstairs for my final break, at a time I'd have been heading home if I was on early's and it was then it hit me and I just couldn't get the thoughts out of my head. It was such a beautiful evening and there I was stuck in work, away from my baby; the things we could have done if I'd have been going home - it was a perfect evening to spend with my baby, a perfect evening for a stroll together or even just sat out in the garden together. It hurt, I kid you not it hurt so much, for a while I kind of despised my job for keeping my baby and I apart, for watching an evening so beautiful waste away and yes, it made me emotional.

I phoned my baby up, he'd just finished for the day and was making his way home; I told him not to waste the evening as it was so beautiful, I told him I loved him so much and that I missed him terribly. He kind of knew, sorry - he just knew that there was something wrong so I just told him whilst apologising at the same time, I didn't want to make him feel bad or anything, not that it's his fault that I found myself stuck in work. My baby he just understands me so well, even when silly things flip my world for good or bad; he understands, he empathises, he puts my mind at ease and he thinks so positively. My baby had me smiling and laughing come the end of the conversation, he helps me, no matter how silly I am, he takes my hand, picks me up and cheers me up; he also reminded me to send him a photo of his flowers...........

My baby asked me last night to send him a photo of his flowers each day we're apart, so he could see how they're progressing and so he didn't miss them; it hit me hard when he asked me, I just thought it was such a beautiful sentiment - he absolutely adores them. He made me promise to look after them, water them (which I've done tonight baby) and I've even talked to them - I told them not to worry or miss my baby too much because he'll be back to look after them in no time. I owe it to my baby, it's what he would do, so I'm doing exactly the same; besides I want them to be as healthy and happy when my baby's back with me - they make him smile, I always want to see my baby smiling.

Talking of last night we sat outside in the garden until late again, it appears the best parts of the day weather wise of late are evening into night where it brightens up and warms up before fading into a mild night. It just felt so special probably because we both knew it was our last night together for a while and more than ever we savoured every moment; in particular I became real kind of emotional in a good way - I needed lots of hugs and kisses, I got lots of hugs and kisses and they made me go all girly. We sat drinking Brandy and watched a low moon, so bold and so bright crawl across the sky; it looked so big and so close. I told my baby it looked too heavy for the sky, like it would fall to the ground and it someways it did - it painted the ground in a ghostly light. Our evenings are filled with such magic, it's no wonder I miss them and they're not even remotely the same when I find myself alone. I miss the magic and I miss my baby because it's my baby that brings such times alive; I love to feel alive, I love to feel loved and I love my baby so much xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Nighttime dreamtime

2010-04-25T20:36:00.000+01:00

My baby and I were working yesterday - me because I had to and my baby by choice, you read it correctly my baby worked out of choice; a beautifully warm and sunny Saturday and we were both stuck in work. I was working all day and my baby worked until 2 o'clock so at least he had the afternoon free to enjoy the weather. I feel for my baby when the weather's good because he's stuck inside in the office all day; he can see how beautiful the day is but barring his breaks he can't get out and enjoy the weather, yesterday was no different. To be honest I felt a little guilty because my baby should have been off all this weekend, hence he could have been out enjoying the sunshine yesterday instead of being stuck in the office; but he managed to swap with one of his colleagues so he could get next weekend off because I'm off next weekend so we could be together. He's a sweetheart and I appreciate it benefits us both but still, my baby's so thoughtful, he swapped his weekend sift so we could be together, I don't know, it's just so selfless and it's the best news ever. In fact we've been talking about this tonight, I was working again today by the way, but when I got home my baby reminded me there's only five days to go before it's weekend again where we'll have it all to ourselves, to enjoy together. He's so positive and he thinks such beautiful thoughts that it's impossible not to feel great when I'm with him; I was happy anyway when I got home this evening but he just made me happier.

Back to yesterday, a wonderfully warm and sunny day, it was just divine and it faded into a beautiful evening too; my baby met me on the way home from work, this time it was planned, he let me know by text. I was a couple of minutes late getting away last night and as I got to Wellington Street I found my baby waiting for me on the opposite side of the road; waiting with a smile, a kiss and a cuddle. Oh gosh he's such eye candy, he was wearing a pair of shorts and a polo shirt, and he just looked divine - so cute, so cheeky, so summery and so gorgeous; as soon as I saw him my face lit up and my heart skipped a beat, as soon as I was in his arms my heart just melted. I love walking with my baby, wherever we go or find ourselves, even if it is just walking home from work together; just having someone so special to share my thoughts with, to share my day with and I find it so utterly romantic that my baby meets me from work and walks me safely home - once he takes hold of my hand he doesn't let go, I never want him to let go...............

As we walked back home we talked about heading out for a few beers later in the night, it was a beautiful evening for it but as it would have been in Straightville we decided against it, we really couldn't be bothered acting straight! So we took a detour to the corner shop and picked up some beers after deciding to stay in and stay gay! Once home I got washed and changed into a pair of shorts and a t-shirt and returned downstairs to find my baby had made some coffee and was sat outside in the garden waiting for me. We sat, talked, held hands and I could feel myself unwinding and relaxing; I could literally feel it as it was happening, not that I'd had a stressful day but still I could feel it. The late evening sun, the blue sky, the warmth, the birds busily flying and singing, not to mention the sexy boyfriend sat next to me holding my hand and keeping me entertained; everything came together and filled my heart and soul with joy.

We headed inside to make tea, I'd picked up Spaghetti Margarita from Marks & Spencer and we had it with a mixed leaf salad and a warm ciabatta. It wasn't exactly the most difficult tea in the World to cook but it was the most fun; we were both busy in the kitchen - laughing, joking and generally fooling around with the occasional bit of cooking, oh gosh we had such fun. Tea itself was awesome, the spaghetti dish was delicious - so simple yet so tasty and the mixed leaf salad and the ciabatta were the perfect side dishes for it; in fact it was the perfect dish for the evening because it tasted like Summer. The past couple of nights, once the sun has gone down, it's gone rather chilly but last night it remained warm throughout; after tea we went and sat outside again and that's where we remained. There was one point just as dusk descended when you could feel the heat of the day rising up from the ground, my baby and I were sat there and I could just feel it. I turned to my baby and asked if he'd noticed it, if he could feel the heat radiating around us despite the night closing in; we kind of sat in silence for a few minutes and just immersed ourselves in the moment. My baby broke the silence and said it was magical; and it was, it was nothing if not magical, it's a beautiful phenomenon to feel the heat of the day rising back up out of the earth.

We sat out until around 11 o'clock - we drank some beers and ended up snuggled so close together looking up at the sky; looking up at the moon as it traversed in and out of the clouds. I was thinking out loud, thinking of how the beauty of nature always blows me away, when I said to my baby, we're so lucky to be alive and I'm so lucky to be able to share these moments with someone like you, it's like a dream that doesn't end. I felt my baby's grip on my hand tighten followed by a kiss on my cheek, I turned to see him smiling and I knew I wasn't wrong..........

No words

2010-04-23T23:11:00.000+01:00

My baby's flowers finally succumb this morning; my baby got up and got ready first - the alarm went off at stupid o'clock and we spent the first ten minutes thereafter coming around from a sleepy haze. I love that time of morning, despite the fact that I'm such a bad morning person, I honestly love that sleepy hazy feeling of lying awake in bed next to my baby; it's so quiet, peaceful and it just feels like I'm coming back into the World from another planet. My appreciation of how beautiful my baby is is at it's peak at that time of day too, it's kind of like I'd forgotten just how beautiful he is after a sleep and it's like waking up to the first morning together every morning. My heart skips a beat when I turn to see my baby next to me in bed and he is so unbelievably cute when he's just woken up; oh gosh he's stupidly cute and his sleepy smile is to die for. My baby leaned over and kissed me so softly and the sparks just ignited inside; oh gosh I told him his kisses were wonderful and I asked him ever so politely for some more, my baby kissed me again and again, I could have stayed there all day kissing my baby but work intervened quite rudely! As my baby was getting ready in the bathroom the last memory of last night before I fell to sleep came back to mind; I was lay on my side curled in the foetal position and my baby was on his side lay right up into my back with his hand stretched out over me. We were so close and I felt so safe and secure; we couldn't have been any closer and I could feel certain parts of his body pressed into me. It was the last thing I remembered, I must have slept well because I don't remember anything else until the alarm clock went off; it's no wonder I slept well........

My baby returned from the bathroom as naked as the day he was born, it was such a sight that I literally jumped out of bed in one motion and headed over to give him a kiss, a cuddle and a grope before allowing him to get ready in peace whilst I took over in the bathroom. By the time I'd finished and got ready, the bed was made and my baby was downstairs making coffee and pouring the cereal - he looks after me so much and my baby's disagreeing here saying it's me that looks after him most of the time. But he is such a kind and considerate soul, and so thoughtful, nothing's any trouble for him and he doesn't expect any praise for anything he does; he's as beautiful on the inside as he is on the outside. Have I told you recently that I love you baby? Oh gosh, I've gone all shy and bashful again; my baby makes me all giddy at times, oh I don't know but it's a nice feeling, sometimes I feel so innocent; and as my baby's just said it's such a good feeling to have - it's so true.

After we'd finished breakfast my baby went into the lounge to open the curtains allowing the morning light to pour in and, as always, he went to check on his flowers and what remained of them were in a poor state. They'd lasted nigh on three weeks which we both said was nothing short of a miracle and they had brought so much colour and joy to our lives, my baby's in particular - gosh how he loved and cared for them, and how I loved to watch him; they were worth every single penny and then some. I didn't say anything to him as we headed out for work but it was always at the back of my mind from that moment on until I found myself in Marks & Spencer getting my lunch; until I found myself perusing through the flower section and walking out with lunch and two bunches of tulips............

This time I got home way before my baby, as I normally do on a weekday, and so had plenty of time to hide the tulips; the old flowers were still in the vase, so it appeared like nothing had changed. To be honest I had to fight myself from telling him at lunch time, I was sat eating my lunch and replying to a text my baby had sent me; and I was so excited that I'd bought him some more flowers that I wanted to tell him straightaway - I'm terrible at keeping things a secret, particularly if I know such secrets will bring so much happiness. My baby got home from work and I was trying my best to leave the surprise until he'd got washed, changed and settled down but it was killing me, somehow I managed to do it but only just. As soon as my baby returned downstairs I let it slip, I said I hope you don't mind but I bought you something today, before opening the back door and grabbing the flowers I'd placed out of view outside. Now I wasn't feeling sentimental and it was never in the plan for me to cry but as soon as my baby set his eyes on the flowers; one huge smile grew across his face - a smile so beautiful, that meant so much to me and connected straight to my heart, that, well the tears welled up in my eyes and began rolling down my cheeks.

Lots of hugs, kisses and kind words later my baby managed to dry my tears and then started to unwrap his flowers. I just sat in the kitchen watching him and as ever he was so careful with them - he washed the vase out, filled it up with fresh water, added the liquid food, trimmed the tulips down and took so much time arranging them. All the while he was talking out loud, saying how beautiful they were and talking to the flowers as he placed them in the vase; I just couldn't help but smile and feel so happy, it was so beautiful to watch. Eventually my baby finished, picked the vase up and asked me what I thought of his display; sometimes there are no words to describe such beauty.............

Sing your life

2010-04-22T22:03:00.000+01:00

Good evening boys and girls, we're kind of late tonight checking in because we're late doing everything; we got sidetracked and took some time out for ourselves, it wasn't planned and we think the best things in life are often unplanned. Take my baby and me for example, a perfect example actually - neither of us we're looking for a boyfriend when we met, both of us for entirely different reasons, we were both looking to get laid, no strings sex that's all. It was a simple proposition, it worked and that's all it was; there was no denying I thought my baby was utterly cute but it was just sex. Yet here we are, way over a year down the line, together, in love, boyfriends; we just kind of fell into it to be honest, it wasn't planned and I think if it even was maybe it wouldn't have worked out as well as it has done. We don't know and more importantly we don't care because all that matters is the fact that somehow it did happen, it worked, continues to work and we're both so very happy as a result. How about another example? Say an off the cuff decision to go for a walk on a sunny evening after work.............

Upon my return home from work I got washed and changed into a pair of shorts and a t-shirt; I made a coffee and sat outside in the back garden soaking up the evening sunshine - it was a beautiful end to a beautiful day, or so I thought. The silence was interrupted by my baby ringing me with a strange question; he asked if I'd started tea yet? Strange question indeed I told him, but I'd not started tea and I enquired as to why. He told me he really hadn't gotten much of a chance to get out of his office and enjoy the weather today and with it being such a wonderful evening he asked if I'd like to go out for a walk when he got home. I became all girly and enquired if he was asking me out on a date; the answer? Yes, he wanted to take his boyfriend out for a walk with him; oh gosh what else can a gay-boy do but say yes, so that's what I said, it was all I was going to say all along - an evening out with the cutest and sexiest guy I know, I'd have been foolish to say anything else. Besides it was a beautiful evening and as the regular readers may remember I posted on here not so long ago about how I couldn't wait for the long Summer evenings when we could get home from work and do exactly what we did tonight - head out for a walk together. It's not exactly Summer yet admittedly, but it's near enough.

I got so excited at the prospect, oh gosh I really did, I finished my coffee, headed upstairs to change into a pair of more respectable shorts (don't ask!), grabbed a shirt, my trainers and waited for my baby to get home. It seemed like I was waiting ages for my baby, time seemed to be going in slow motion and I found myself heading out into the back garden to smoke yet another cigarette. In reality he got home slightly earlier than normal, we kissed and cuddled before my baby headed upstairs to get washed and changed; he returned downstairs in a shorts and light jumper combo; and he looked awesome, no joke my baby looked like a million dollars. He took about ten minutes but looked so gorgeous, like he'd spent hours getting the exact perfect look, it suited him so well, it suited the evening so well and I couldn't help but tell him that he looked absolutely divine and I was so proud that he was my boyfriend. Some guys are just born so cute that no matter what they wear they still look beautiful - my baby he's one of those guys, gosh I love him so xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Now I thought we'd just be heading for a stroll around Stockport, head out and go wherever it took us; you see my baby didn't actually specify where we'd be going, so when he grabbed his car keys when were both ready to go I was admittedly confused. Not that I said anything because I didn't have to say anything due to the fact that my baby noticed straight off and asked me what was up. My baby wanted to take me to Woodbank Park for a walk, that's what was up, that was his master plan and did I mind? Not for one second, it was an even better surprise, such a good surprise that I grabbed him and gave him a big kiss and cuddle - any excuse I know but the only excuse I need to kiss and cuddle my baby is because I love him to bits and he's my sweetheart. It was a wonderful evening, walking hand in hand in the late evening sun, talking, laughing, joking and just having fun. Doing something we both love to do, taking time out for ourselves, for our own enjoyment, with no distractions; there was nothing else on our minds except the moment at hand. It's the most perfect way to unwind after a day at work; my baby called it and I guess it means more to him as he's cooped up in an office for the majority of the day and so misses such glorious weather. My baby said it was such a relief and it made such a difference - an hour or so ago he was escaping the confines of the office and fighting his way through the streets of Manchester. There he was dressed down in a pair of shorts, holding my hand and feeling a million miles away from the madness he had just escaped; and it showed, it showed in both of us, we were just so relaxed, carefree and happy.

We sat on the grass and watched the sun disappear, watched two dogs playing with each other and watched the birds flying by so freely above us. A distinct chill permeated the air once the sun disappeared so I cuddled up close to my baby; I commented on the birds flying by so freely above us, I told my baby that's probably why birds sing - because they're happy and free to go wherever they want. I told him they reminded me of us, my baby smiled and kissed me; he makes my heart sing.................

Birds

2010-04-20T22:22:00.001+01:00

My baby and I have both had a wonderful day today, we've both been working and despite nothing of note really making it special, we've both had a great day. My baby texted me during his lunch break, a text I didn't pick up until way late because, well I was late getting my lunch; but I could just tell he was having a great day. Despite the fact that he stated the fact, I could just tell from the nature of his text - it was so sunny and happy, more than my baby normally is if that's possible. Even if I wasn't having such a good day to know my baby was having a great day would have cheered me up regardless, but I was, I was having a busy but a great day. The hours were flying by, my baby was in my thoughts and as a result such thoughts were beautiful; to be honest despite it being a great day I couldn't wait for it to end so I could get home and wait for my baby. It was just a warm fuzzy feeling that stayed with me through the day, I missed my baby today, I missed him in a good way; like I wasn't pining for him or miserable with it, it was just an I couldn't wait to be back with him feeling. My baby's beautiful, I love him to bits xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

I texted my baby back over lunch and I just let it all go, I told him how much I'd been thinking of him, how cute and sexy he is, and how much I love him; it just needed to be said because it was exactly how I was feeling. I finished the text with a hope that it made him smile because I like to see him happy, it brightens up my World. It did and my baby did, he replied late afternoon and oh gosh, I just find it so lovely to know that my love has a heart and a home; and that's it's so readily received and appreciated. If the day wasn't good enough my baby managed to get out and about for lunch and he took his colleague Fiona on a date; he took her for lunch bless him. He told me all about it when he got home and once again I could just tell from the way he was talking about it that it meant so much, he's so transparent - all the beauty in him just comes pouring out; it's such a wonderful trait and he's such a sweetheart. Amongst other things they talked about us, our relationship, and as I've already said, my love has a heart and a home. I managed to spend some time with girlfriend today, we've both been so busy that we've hardly seen each other; thankfully I got to spend ten minutes catching up with her, it was way not enough time, but as always it was just so good to see her and share a laugh and a joke. I got cuddles from my replacement girlfriend H today - it's okay boys and girls I'm not cheating, girlfriend asked H to look after me when she left and she does; she always checks to make sure I'm okay. This afternoon I just fancied a cuddle so I asked H and she agreed, she gives nice cuddles bless her, I love cuddles...................

I've had lots more cuddles and kisses tonight; I couldn't wait for my baby to get home and as soon as he walked through the door I told him I needed a cuddle. He cuddled me so close into his body, his arms wrapped safely around me and I just snuggled my head into his shoulder as I felt his kiss upon my cheek. I just needed it, I needed my baby's love; for every right reason I felt so fragile and so defenceless; I needed the comfort and security of my baby's arms - it was blissful. Whilst having tea my baby noticed through the kitchen window that there were loads of birds in the back garden; seriously there were way more than normal. After we'd finished I made some coffee and we sat on the back step, it was a pleasant evening but it was kind of chilly and not exactly sitting out weather. Regardless of the fact we managed to sit together on the back step, it was a tight squeeze but we managed it and didn't mind it because it meant we could cuddle up even closer and keep each other warm. We sat, we kissed, cuddled and drank coffee whilst watching all the birds come and go; there were so many and they were so busy - they kept us entertained for so long. I rested my hand on my baby's thigh and he placed his hand on mine, his fingers intertwined between mine; it's been a great day................

So beautiful.........

2010-04-19T20:25:00.001+01:00

......... it made me cry.

My baby's just been tending to his flowers, as he does every night when we're together - each night without fail he takes a couple of minutes to check them, to pick out any dead ones, to rearrange them, to top up the water and to stand back and look at them. They've done incredibly well, he's had them over a fortnight and their longevity has surprised us both; but I guess when you lavish them with love, care and attention - as my baby does, it must help, they've been very happy flowers. As a further guess, this is also where my baby and I differ because I do like to look at them, they are beautiful and they brighten the house up but for me that's pretty much it, I don't really get involved in them beyond that; or I didn't until this evening. My baby, well he's the one who shows a true caring interest in them, he gets involved and gives them his time; and that's not just because they were a gift from me, he does it because that's the kind of guy he is, that's his nature. He treats them like, I don't know, but like they're more than flowers; he treats them like he would treat me or any other of his friends - like he treats any other living thing I guess. He doesn't know he's doing it and there's nothing wrong in it at all but he does treat them like they've got feelings, like they can appreciate the care and love he gives them - I guess they can, I'm certain they can.

They took a bad hit today, there were three or four flowers that had succumb and were far from looking their best. I was watching my baby as he went out about his evening ritual and when he noticed the dead flowers and began picking them out he was saying out loud, oh we've got a dead one babes, oh no here's another one too. He was stating fact, he wasn't getting emotional over it, unlike me; for some reason it just hit me - the flowers were fading away and dying; such beauty and it's never meant to last. I started to feel real upset, not only for my baby as his flowers declined in numbers but for the flowers themselves, after a couple of weeks of them brightening our lives up, we had to witness their decline. I appreciate it's a silly and an over sentimental train of thought but I couldn't help myself, it just hit me out of nowhere whilst watching my baby. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes as my baby continued to pull out the remaining dead flowers and once complete he rearranged the remaining good ones within the vase. And then he started to talk to them, it was just the most beautiful moment I've ever witnessed, he was talking to them like they could hear and understand him - like he'd talk to me; just the purest sentiment I've ever seen. He talked to the flowers still in the vase and then thanked the dead flowers in his hand for bringing us so much colour and beauty; and the tears just rolled down my face - not just one or two, there were floods of tears..............

My baby turned around to face me and well, there I was, in a state of emotional abandonment; he rushed on over to comfort me whilst asking me what was wrong but I couldn't talk. He cuddled and kissed me whilst helping to dry my tears and pleading with me to tell him what was wrong. When I regained some self composure I told him there was nothing wrong, it was in fact quite the opposite; it was his caring, loving nature - so effortless, open and all encompassing that blew me completely away. My baby thought it was a compliment but it wasn't, it was nothing but the truth; a truth so beautiful it made me cry. For you baby, you make me feel like your flowers - so loved and so cared for; and just like your flowers you're beautiful. With love xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Perfect beginning

2010-04-18T18:42:00.005+01:00

Er, hello, is there anybody still out there......?

Yes we know, it's been a while and we post like mad for months on end and then there's nothing, we go quiet, we disappear for a while and people think we've split as a result; no joke we were inundated with emails asking if everything's alright. Inundated is a slight exaggeration to be honest - here I am your drama queen, it doesn't translate well on here but trust us it's funny in person; you see you sing it to the tune of Rocket Queen by Guns n Roses - here I am your drama queen, I may be a little young but honey I ain't naive; you get the gist right? And as my baby has just reminded me a joke is not that funny when you have to explain it; and yes perhaps I shouldn't have even mentioned it in the first place either and I promise I'll stop with this train of thought baby, well soon anyway. You see the lyric doesn't reflect me personally, you see I am young and I am naive but it's close enough or something like that! Excuse me it appears someone has said something funny, my baby's laughing at something here, what's so funny Mr cutey boyfriend? I may have stretched the truth slightly with the young claim, are we happy now? Oh and the naive claim too, gosh you're such a spoil sport baby but I'll forgive you; still you're only halfway there baby, and why are we having a conversation via blogger? We're sat next to each other, in the same room and on the same sofa; I know that because my baby keeps giving me kisses and occasionally his hands wander, just like that - OH MY GOSH, right on cue, you'll have it turning into a cue if you don't stop baby! I've just retorted your claim to be naive baby, young - yes, naive - NO; I know the things you can do, dear me you do them well, I thank my lucky stars you're not naive baby, you make me see stars. I could go on, oh my last night was just immense, in the echelons of gay sex there was nothing like last night, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. I mean we have awesome sex, stupidly fantastic but last night, I honestly can't even explain it; except for the fact that afterwards we couldn't move for at least ten minutes, no joke, we were lay on the bed breathless, exhausted, exasperated - we couldn't have moved if our lives had depended on it. When my baby regained his senses he asked me if I enjoyed it, it's a good job I was still lay down because the question had me in fits of laughter, I was in absolute tatters at his comic genius; just the funniest question ever asked. It was that good it kept me laughing throughout last night and today, each time I thought about it or when it drifted into my mind I had a little giggle to myself; if people were watching me walk round at work today they must have thought I was crazy laughing away to myself. There's another story from yesterday which I must get around to telling at some point, once again my baby had me in absolute fits of laughter - he's been on some serious form lately, he makes me laugh so much.

So where were we? I was working today whilst my baby had a day off, once again it was so difficult to leave him in bed and get up to go to work this morning; it was the last thing I wanted to do, gosh he looks so cute and fragile whilst he's sleeping - it honestly melts my heart; you're the most beautiful boyfriend in the World baby, damn I love you so much xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox. It does boys and girls; and I'm sorry to go on but I just write as if I'm thinking aloud, I can't help it; he's so gorgeous, the most beautiful guy I could ever hope to wake up next to in a morning. Anyway my day at work was a slow, lifeless affair and I feel so much better for it, there was no complaining about boredom today because work's been so full on this week that I was glad of the lack of activity. I had lots of time to myself, lots of time to relax, lots of time to text and talk to my baby, and lots of time to enjoy the weather. Not that the weather was the best today, it was kind of overcast and slightly cooler as a result; but it was dry and come late afternoon the wind died down and it felt warm again. It was pleasant, real nice and as the clock ticked on towards home time those pleasant feelings grew and grew.

By the time I found myself walking home, I was where I wanted to be, super chilled out; and the walk home was beautiful too, the streets and the roads were quiet and it did feel like a lazy Sunday evening - so peaceful and calming. I was stood at the crossing on Wellington Street waiting for the odd car that was around to pass and as I started walking across the road I noticed a guy walk around the corner, I looked, looked away and then it registered or I think it did; I had to look again to make sure. I was right, dressed in a pair of fleece shorts - a very well fitting pair of fleece shorts and a t-shirt; looking so Summery, so sexy and with a smile to match was my baby. I could feel a smile grow across my face and I just starting laughing inanely as I negated the road and found myself safe in my baby's arms. Oh my gosh just the best surprise, my baby had come to meet me from work and walk me home, a fact that was quite obvious but it didn't stop me from asking him the stupidest question, what are you doing here? Yes, I know...............

Such a sweet gesture, oh my such a sweetheart; we walked round the corner away from the main road and we stopped for a kiss which kind of turned into a snog and my hands kind of found there way to the front of my baby's shorts. I couldn't keep my hands off, it was impossible, it was the first thing that struck me when I saw him wearing them - they do fit him so well! We walked the rest of the way home hand in hand, talking and sharing our respective days with each other; it was just beautiful. It wasn't the perfect ending to the day, it was better than that, it was the perfect beginning to the evening; an evening that's only just begun.

Far

2010-04-14T22:54:00.000+01:00

Oh gosh what a day boys and girls and I don't use that statement positively, not that anything bad happened but still it wasn't exactly ideal. It was just one of those days where I couldn't escape the office or my desk, one of those days where the whole World and his dog wanted everything from me at the same time and as a result one of those days where I couldn't find any time or space. It's the time and space that does me every time, I mean I appreciate the fact that by the very nature of work it can be busy and get hectic at times, and I can live with that - that's where I really earn my money. But I do need time and space, if I don't I feel restricted and weighted down, and I abhor feeling restricted - it upsets me; I'm a free-spirited guy in many respects, if nothing else it's one the traits of being an Aquarian and for me that trait is so true. But I'm not that much of a free-spirit..............

Come late afternoon I felt exhausted, not from my workload but from the restrictiveness of the day, I couldn't even think straight (no pun intended boys and girls!) and my mind was just messed up. Truth be told it dragged me down some and it did upset me; and I got to thinking why do the bad days always come around when my baby and I are apart? That's right my baby and I apart tonight for the first time in a long while, late finishes boy and girls, late finishes! Not that I complain, I mean when all's said and done my baby and I are very fortunate because we see each other so often, we almost live together these days; besides my baby needs to go check on his flat occasionally and make sure it's still standing. He needs to see his friends too, particularly Rach, my baby misses Rach when they've been apart for a while which is more than understandable - they're the best of friends. It fills my heart with love, when my baby and Rach get together after spending any length of time apart the next time Rach phones me she always says my baby can't stop talking about what we've been up to together since the last time they saw each other. Despite the fact they speak or text every other day or so, and I speak to Rach at least once a week, so she knows what we've been up to anyway; my baby gives her a full run down in person. I just think it's such a beautiful trait my baby possesses, it's so twee and just lovely, seriously lovely; as I said it fills my heart with a love so warm - my baby is such a sweetheart xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

So I got to thinking why do such bad days strike when my baby and I are apart? But do they? I mean perhaps it's the fact that when I know I'll be going home to my baby then such bad days don't feel that bad at all. Because I know come the end of it I'll see my baby's smile and eyes, feel his warmth and touch and have his caring love - it's a major reason to forget all the worries and smile. Tonight I didn't have that luxury, not in person anyway but my baby was only a phone call away; and that's where I've been for the past forty odd minutes - talking to my baby. Gosh he's cheered me up so much, not that I really went on about nor complained over my bad day, I kept the drama queen touch firmly aside. I just talked and talked, it's all I needed - a friendly and understanding ear, an outlet, a place where I could just talk without hesitation or without even thinking. And to hear my baby's voice, even if we can't be together, it helps so much, it's such a comfort; it closes down the distance that parts us and puts me at ease. My baby on the other hand had enjoyed a mighty fine day and he shared the highlights with me; and I could feel the sunshine in his voice, it comes through all the time and it's a joyous experience. It's like I can see the tales he's telling in my mind, he brings everything to life and it shines so brightly and so vividly - my baby often says I do that with this blog and through my poetry, and he says it's a gift. I don't doubt him for one second but he does the exact same thing just through speaking and talking, through his descriptions of the day and thats more than a gift. My baby he's much more than a gift..............

Towards the end of our conversation my baby began giggling to himself, straight out of the blue he just started off giggling. When I asked him what was up he told me he just thought it was so funny - through the first few months after we became boyfriends he was always encouraging me not to bottle stuff up inside and to phone him whenever I needed to get something out of my mind. Occasionally I still do fall foul of myself but my baby knows me so well now that he just steps in and interrupts the process when he sees the signs. He said all the effort he initially put in hadn't gone to waste - admittedly I was very hard work; and it just made him so happy to know that there I was phoning him up to talk to him even when I'd had a difficult day. He wasn't laughing at me, he was laughing at how far we'd come; after we hung up I found myself smiling again, I'm not that much of a free sprit, we've come very far...........

Painted blue

2010-04-12T21:58:00.000+01:00

Good evening boys and girls, where've you all been? It's been so long and we used to be such good friends but now you don't post for days on end, what's up with you? I don't know what I'm on about either, my baby's looking at me puzzled which means he's no idea what I'm going on about and as my baby understands me better than I do (no joke) well, what is going on? I'm just being mischievous, that's all, just putting a spin on the fact that we've not posted since Friday and laying blame elsewhere whilst I'm at it. Not that there's any blame to lay, why lay blame when it's much more fun to get laid myself by Mr cute and sexy boyfriend? Gosh he knows how to shag, he knows how to make a guy delirious with pleasure and all that pleasure belongs to me; along with everything else because there is everything else..........

You know when you're looking forward to something so much, say for example a weekend off together, and you hype it up so much that sometimes it doesn't live up to those expectations because such expectations are impossibly high? It's fair to say we were both in that boat with the weekend looming down upon us, we were both so stupidly excited and we had big ideas about what we wanted to get up to and how much fun we'd have together, basically because it had been so long. Those expectations were exceeded, we kid you not, it was the most beautiful weekend you could dare to imagine; and I say you because we dared not imagine it would be so good. It was staggeringly beautiful, from start to finish - as soon as my baby got home Friday evening to us leaving for work this morning; just beyond any kind of belief. I don't think I've ever been so happy, carefree and in love in my life, just so relaxed and that was part of the problem, part of the reason why there's been no posts. Blogging was the last thing on my mind, to be honest it didn't even register, nothing registered barring me, my baby and the sunshine; and I appreciate many things may be lost on here as a result, many wonderful memories will not see the light but they're safe regardless, safe in mine and my baby's heart and soul, and that is all that truly matters - time spent together making memories to cherish, memories that will stay with us for a long, long time.............

My baby's just given me a big hug and an even bigger kiss for that last sentence; he said it's so true and it's kept him smiling all day at work, just thinking back to the last two days spent together - I know how you feel baby, it's etched into us, days like those are impossible to forget for every right reason. I hope we look back upon them when we're sat together during the cold, dark nights of Winter, they'll provide the light and the warmth, Summer may have faded away by then but it will be forever Summer in our hearts; nothing can take that away from us, nothing at all. Life is a wondrous thing boys and girls, you should always try to live each day like it matters because it does, it matters so very much; and when you find someone to share those days, it just gets better and it matters even more. Hand on heart that is nothing but the truth and I'm starting to get somewhat emotional now but it just fills my heart and soul with everything that's good in life, there are so many things that are good, just so many.........

Saturday morning we woke to bright sunshine and blue skies, we had breakfast and then sat out in the garden drinking coffee; it was so warm and it was so blissful. We sat, relaxed, talked, laughed and joked whilst waking up fully; I love that hazy early morning feeling, I absolutely adore it. It's like our brains haven't fully engaged properly and we're kind of running on memory or something, it's difficult to explain, but it did strike me so hard and true Saturday morning. It's like our words and actions are just said and done without thinking, and there's such a purity and innocence about them; and my baby made me feel like a child again, just laughing because things were funny, saying things because they were so true and loving because there was a guy sat next to me that I could do nothing but love. It was such a beautiful moment in time and it was a precursor to what would follow.

We went shopping into Manchester both dressed in shorts and t-shirts; it was the most beautiful day, it was seriously busy but it didn't matter. Walking around feeling my baby's hand in mine, the blue skies above us, the sun and its warmth shining down upon us; oh gosh I don't think we ever stopped smiling - each time I looked at my baby his face was aglow with a brilliant smile, just the cutest, cheekiest, sunniest smile. It was impossible not to kiss his happy face, and we kissed and kissed, and our smiles grew broader, it was blissful. We spent obscene amounts of money in Fatface, we had a serious blowout but they've got an awesome range of clothing at the moment, the best we've seen in there in a long time. I bought a blueberry and pink striped polo shirt, a pair of bright blue canvas trainers and a striped belt but my baby outdid me to some tune. He bought a green and blue bold check short sleeved shirt, an orange check hooded shirt and a pair of grey with green side stripe fleece track pants; everything and I mean everything we bought is beautiful, and was worth every single penny. I so wanted the track pants my baby bought but I resisted temptation, I've got so many pairs or I did have until we went into size. Where I saw a pair of Adidas Originals shiny blue/green with red stripes track pants, I just knew as soon as I saw them, resistance was futile, so I now have another pair to add to my collection. Talking of adding to our collection we bought some new pants too, and we know we've got so many pairs of pants, too many to be honest but we've never seen pants like them before. We kid you not the most beautiful pants the World has ever seen, they literally took our breath away, they're from the new limited edition Hom range and dear me I can't even describe them to you because it wouldn't do them justice; photo's will follow at some stage. We had a late lunch at Pizza Express we shared garlic bread, tomato and mozzarella salad and a spicy sausage pizza; we sat outside with shopping bags strewn around our feet watching the World go by. Manchester came alive around us, we sat, ate lunch - often feeding each other, and the sunshine just transformed her, more than ever Manchester felt very cosmopolitan with a real European chic and swagger, it's amazing what the sun can do and it was beautiful to be a part of it. We we're in love with the day, with the surroundings and with each other; we could feel it and it showed......

My baby wore his new hooded shirt Saturday night, gosh he looked so gorgeous; the night saw us back in Manchester, in the gay village and at Spirit to be precise. Spirit because they've got a roof terrace where you can sit outside and chill out; and that's exactly what we did. It was magical, as the night closed in and cooled down we sat, talked and kissed; at one point I got lost gazing into my baby's eyes in complete silence. I was completely and utterly gone until my baby offered a penny for my thoughts, I didn't take a penny but I told him my thoughts; oh my I'm such a hopeless romantic. I even asked my baby for a dance, it was getting a bit chilly outside so I asked him formally if he'd like to accompany me inside and perhaps dance with me if he didn't mind; and then for some unknown reason I became a little bashful and shy. I don't know I just came over all coy, it was kind of silly to be honest and my baby picked up on it straight away but he didn't mock me; instead he said it was beautiful and gave me a kiss and a cuddle. And just in case you're wondering my baby took up the offer of dancing with me - we danced, it took away the chill and made the night into morning. A rather cool morning, we certainly felt it when we eventually departed, so much so that we had to cuddle up real close to keep each other warm, so close that despite the alcohol consumption it became apparent that it had not affected our ability or desire to get horny with each other; but not enough alcohol consumption to go about such business in the back streets, we waited until we got home, we're nothing if not classy (for a change)! My baby pulled his hood up on the way home and did the funniest and drunkest ET impression ever seen, it was absolutely hilarious and I kid you not I collapsed on the floor through laughing so much, I was in bits. You could pay a million pounds and see every comedian in the World but I promise you would never witness anything so funny as my baby doing a drunk ET impression; it was beyond funny.

A late and rather hazy Sunday morning found us making sandwiches and packing pork pies, crisps and drinks (of the non alcoholic variety) before we headed out to Lyme Park for a picnic. It was my baby's idea as we once again took coffee out in the garden after breakfast; it was a beautiful day for it - a day made for a pair of shorts, a t-shirt and a picnic in the park. It was the perfect wind down after a day and a long night of indulgence, time more than ever just for us, of laying back in the grass and staring up. Everywhere we looked it was painted blue.............

Scream

2010-04-09T17:56:00.000+01:00

Today of all days it should have been a day of winding down, slipping out of work mode and slipping into weekend off with my cute and sexy boyfriend mode; the passing of one phase into another, of thoughts of my baby, me, sunshine and lots of time to spend together. It's no secret we've been looking forward to this weekend, it's pretty much been in all our posts during this week and just when you get to the finishing line, and think you're home and dry, you get a day that didn't go as intended.

It was another beautiful day weather wise, absolutely awesome, a day to be out and about, to be daydreaming of my baby under the warmth of the sun. Instead my day was stupidly busy, and I mean stupidly so - just as I'm in wind down mode the whole World and his dog wants something from me. I kid you not, I hardly had a minute to myself all day, I hardly got anytime to go out and enjoy the sunshine, and most importantly I missed my baby's texts and phone calls. That upset me the most, it hurt, I adore our little text exchanges and phone calls through the day and over lunch and break times but my day was so messed up that I pretty much missed them all; and I did miss them, I missed them so much and I missed my baby so much as a result.

I went out for lunch today with girlfriend and H - even that was way later than planned, we should have gone out at 1.30 but we eventually got out at 2.15; that's how bad it was. I was in such a rush that I forgot my phone and I so needed to speak to or text my baby that well, I really wasn't on the best form ever over lunch. It was wonderful to see girlfriend and H, and spend some time with them - girlfriend even paid for lunch, how rich is she? Or was until she paid for lunch! But it couldn't save my day, I was a bit distant and irksome regardless, I think it may showed some, I don't know? I mean work comes in between my baby and I a great deal already, it's been four weeks since we've enjoyed a weekend off together, but it's a bit much when I can't find five or ten minutes in my day to speak to him or exchange texts; it did upset me. I got back to my office after lunch and my baby had called, he'd texted and left a beautiful voicemail - he'd been out for lunch enjoying the sunshine and I could hear the sunshine in his voice, no joke; even if I had no idea what the weather was like, I could just tell his part of the World was sunny. It's amazing what some good weather can do, and my baby was having a much better day than I was, and he was counting down the hours and minutes until home time. It cheered me up and pissed me off all at the same time - it was so comforting to hear my baby's voice and know he was having a great day but I should have been there to speak to him, to share that moment because that moment had, by that time, gone.

Anyway, it's over now and my baby is on his way to me; there's only good times ahead boys and girls, I've been through the wringer some today but it's been worth it just to get to this point - waiting for my baby and waiting for the weekend to begin. There's beers cooling in the fridge and I just want to kick back, relax into my baby's arms and forget everything; tomorrows a new day with a new set of happy memories just waiting to be made, it's a wonderful thought and it's come just at the right time. I just want to feel like a normal couple again, as two guys in love should do - spending some quality time together without anything else getting in the way; it's been a long time coming and sometimes the frustration just makes me want to scream. Right now though there's only one thing I want to scream and if I scream loudly enough I think my baby might just here me, it can't come quickly enough.........

So close.....

2010-04-08T20:43:00.000+01:00

........we can almost touch it! Good evening boys and girls, you find us both so excited tonight, in fact we've been excited about it all day; we've been like two little boys waiting for the sweet shop to open. Honestly, it's entered into all our conversations and texts, as the hours passed by we became almost giddy with each other, the texts got sillier and sillier and I became more and more mischievous; a fact not only my baby can account for but girlfriend too. That's right it was the wrong time to be a busy girlfriend and have a mischievous boyfriend with your number; gosh I am naughty at times. I showed my baby the texts when he got home, even he was kind of shocked, I say kind of because he was laughing away at the same time too; it was funny from my point of view at the very least! I don't know what girlfriend thinks, she's not been in contact since my barrage of ill timed texts, perhaps that tells its own story................

Anyway the reason we've been and continue to be so excited is the fact that the weekend is almost upon us, just one more day of work to go and then we're free - my baby, me and a whole weekend to spend together. To share fun, laughter, hugs, kisses and whatever else we can find to fill our time; one thing's for sure the time will be filled - we've so much catching up to do. Despite seeing each other almost every night it's been four weeks since we've spent a full weekend together, four weeks since we've been shopping together, four weeks since we've been partying and not had to curb ourselves or worry about getting up for work the next morning, four weeks is a damn long time. It's too long, it's stupid - work has a great deal to answer for, but we've made our way through happy, well and most importantly together; if nothing else with all those hours of work under our belts and no real time to spend it, well we're guaranteed a good time now. The shackles will soon be off and we'll be let loose; and we talked about this last night, we've missed spending days together so much, even if those days are spent doing nothing more than walking around Manchester together - which we'll probably do, they're just so special when we're together. It transforms the day and you all know how much we love holding hands; and that's the crux of the matter, we've missed holding each others hand. Although it isn't as simple as that, holding hands just symbolises everything else - the love, the companionship, the friendship, the safety and the security; oh man I'm getting all emotional now, I didn't mean to but I can't help it, I can't help but miss days spent with my baby.

Hence our excitement and we're not going to apologise because it's well and truly justified, well and truly deserved; we act like silly schoolboys occasionally and act like silly lovesick schoolboys all the time. It's great you should all try it, there's no need to keep such feelings inside so go out and tell the World, scream at the top of your voice, I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND!

Twice

2010-04-07T17:53:00.005+01:00

If yesterday was good then today is even better, or to be more precise this evening - what an unbelievably beautiful evening; it's just absolutely stunning. We are so blessed, just blessed to be alive, to be a human being, to be able to witness, to be a part of and hopefully to appreciate evenings like these; they're beyond beautiful. The skies are a perfect shade of unbroken blue, the sun is shining, it's relatively mild as a result and it just makes my heart sing.

I couldn't believe it when I left work to head home because the day's been slightly hit and miss weather wise but the evening has more than made up for it. There's always a relief to be heading home from work anyway but when I'm walking home on an evening like this it's all the better. If knowing I'd be with my baby again tonight is not enough on its own, to feel the sunshine on my body and the blue sky above me, well it's bonus time in the feel good factor stakes. It does make you feel better, I honestly could feel myself winding down as I walked home, I thought I was pretty relaxed anyway but if there was any negativity in my body it was well and truly banished by the time I made it to my front door - I could have floated inside when I got there.

About halfway home I figured my baby should just be finishing work himself, so I phoned him up before he started the journey back home, my timing was perfect. He kept me company for the remainder of my walk and I just talked and talked to him, which is unusual because my baby is normally the one who inspires conversation; he didn't really get much of a chance but when he did he made it count. I mean I can go on some and go around the houses to get to what I really want to say, I guess it's similar to this blog, I get easily sidetracked or I just let my mind and spirit wander free to find its own way back home. So what I say in hundreds of words my baby condenses into a sentence; not that he can't talk for England but if there's something specific he wants to say he just says it; it was no different this evening and it's always beautiful, as beautiful as the weather.........

My baby got so excited when I told him what we were having for tea, I was going to keep it a surprise until he got home but I just couldn't help myself. I bought some fresh beef burgers from Marks & Spencer - the weather yesterday afternoon inspired me, it just made me associate the mildness and the promise of Spring with beef burgers; don't ask me why because I can't explain it, I just do. Anyway, I told my baby we were having cheese burgers topped with battered onion rings and a side of chips; the news went down well! Oh gosh, he really did get excited about it, so much that he began giggling to himself and it was about the only time throughout our conversation that I kept quiet. I stopped walking and just listened to him, listened to the joyful sound of my baby so happy and a smile grew across my face, I could feel it growing, it was the most beautiful feeling.

It took me twice as long to walk home this evening, not that I minded, in fact I enjoyed every second of it. With the sun shining down from a sky of blue whilst talking to the guy I adore on the phone, knowing he was so happy and knowing he would be with me soon, well what is there to be anything but grateful for? There's nothing boys and girls, absolutely nothing - it's a good time to be alive and it's a good time to be in love; life may never be perfect but on an evening like this it could be as close as ever.

For my boyfriend xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Springtime

2010-04-06T17:44:00.000+01:00

Good evening boys and girls, I trust you're all happy and well; me? Well, I'm just fine thank you for asking but I find myself alone, oh my gosh no baby, but fear not because it's only for the fact that I'm posting early - he's not back from work yet but he'll be here soon, he's just texted to tell me he's on his way and to tell me other things too, he's the sweetest boyfriend, just the best; and I, I love him so much..............

I've had a fabulous day today and that's why I'm on here already, I just cannot contain it to myself; it really has been wonderful and it's made me feel so alive and so happy. To be honest I don't know why because nothing out of the ordinary has happened, in truth it's been a run of the mill day but still there was something that just elevated it. Maybe it's the fact that the weekend is closing in fast on us, neither my baby or I can wait, it's been four weeks since we've had a weekend off together and the weather forecast for the weekend is looking awesome for us; it appears the sun is going to shine and it's going to warm up nicely. It may have been a long time coming but if the weather is correct we sure know how to pick the right time to be off together; how I hope the sun shines, it will make everything just perfect I'm sure.

The weather this afternoon was great too, after a cool, overcast, windy morning the day brightened up - it was hardly sunny but the wind dropped and it warmed up a treat as a result; it felt wonderful, I was feeling wonderful anyway but it made me feel even better. It was a feeling echoed by my baby - he phoned me as he was finishing his lunch and caught me as I was starting mine; he'd got out of the office during his break as he often does when it's nice and he just thought he'd share the moment with me. It was a beautiful sentiment, so heartwarmingly beautiful, to just share the moment with me and he wished that I was there with him because such moments are better shared together; it hit home, damn it hit home, I'm so glad I left the canteen when he called me............

I bought a vase today to put my baby's flowers in; they look lovely in the presentation box but they look too cramped up - my baby and I talked about it last night, so I took it upon myself to rectify the matter. My baby loves his flowers, every night since he always takes time out to check upon them, to touch, smell and look at them; I just sit back and watch him quietly, it's the most gentle, caring, loving sight I've ever seen, honestly. Which is no surprise to be honest, it's just a reflection of my baby - he's so gentle, caring and loving; but it really does fill my heart with love to know that the flowers mean so much to him. He always comments on them afterwards - saying how beautiful they are, they always make him smile, he always thanks me for buying them for him and he always kisses me; it nearly always brings me close to tears, I don't know, it's just so translucent and so pure. As soon as I got home from work I took the flowers from the presentation box, trimmed them and placed them in the new vase; and they do look lovely and it shows them off better. They're all good and ready for when my baby gets home, I'm sure he'll love them even more now they've got a proper home; and I'm sure he'll check to make sure they're all happy in their new home too.

I've put away my autumn spice potpourri this evening too; with it feeling like spring both inside my heart and soul and outside too it was time to bring a little springtime home. I've replaced it with lime blossom potpourri which is just awesome, it's so sharp and citrusy it just awakens the senses and really does remind me of sunny days. Along with the flowers it looks and feels as it was intended to, all I need now is some sunshine - my baby will be home soon.........

Creme egg

2010-04-05T21:58:00.000+01:00

Happy Easter boys and girls, we hope you're all not over indulging on Easter eggs - all that chocolate, it's very bad for you; gosh you're all so very naughty! We appreciate it's a day late with our greetings but it's better late than never; besides I've been working again today, whilst my baby has enjoyed a leisurely day off, and as always on a Bank Holiday Monday it's messed my head up. Because when working such days they are just like Sundays and all day I've been thinking it is Sunday so I'm no really late at all with my Easter greetings; so what's your excuse baby? It's one I can't publish, trust me, my baby is so crude at times I've no idea where he gets it from? Although I'm being forced to admit that I love him when he's crude, which is true but more to the point I love him all the time and for everything that he is - he's so beautiful, just the most gorgeous boyfriend I could wish for, honestly. I love you baby, I absolutely love you to bits xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Oh gosh, it doesn't take much for me to go all emotional and romantic does it? Then again it's nothing but the truth, seriously I absolutely adore my baby with a passion, gosh I could drown him in kisses and as my baby's just said I often do and he wouldn't want it any other way; oh gosh you're just so sweet - you melt my heart baby always. I've missed my baby today, I've missed him so much, he's been on my mind all the time; I often get days like these - I mean we've seen each other so much but still I just want him more, I couldn't wait for the day to finish so I could get home and be with him. I've been feeling horny with it too, just thinking about my baby's cock and the things I want to do to it before it does things to me; my baby says I'm possessed and I think he's right. Once again it's seen some serious action but I just want more and more, I cannot get enough; besides he really has got the most beautiful cock, it really is good enough to eat! (That's hit the mark, my baby's just encountering a fit of laughter at the moment so I'll have to continue on my own, he's so funny when he laughs, it makes me heart sing and it's infectious. It's true though, his cock is good enough to eat, trust me boys and girls, it looks so appetising that I can't keep it out of my mouth! I'm sorry, I'm getting gross now but it's funny, come on - if you can't talk about sex then there's something seriously wrong with you.)

Foreplay tonight was painful because we tried out the epilator we bought for the first time proper, it wasn't foreplay really but it seemed like it. I was just so horny and my baby undressed me and kissed me before he started shaving me; and then to feel his hands and his touch upon my skin, oh my gosh I needed it so bad. I was brought down to earth by the epilator, dear me did it hurt, like seriously painful - my baby started off on the bottom of my leg and it soon became apparent that it really wasn't doing much hair removal. Nonetheless he moved up my leg to my thigh and that's when the pain kicked it, like serious swearing pain and still it wasn't removing much hair, it hurt like hell without getting any results. I had to tell my baby to stop, he said it can't hurt that much so we swapped places and I advised him before I started that it would hurt that much. I started on my baby's thigh too, I didn't get any further, my baby came to the same conclusion that I did - a bucket load of pain for very little gain. We sat on the bed looking at the offending tool, (that's the epilator and nothing else, honestly - well not really honestly - I can't help myself, hang on we can't help ourselves; naughty, horny, one track mind baby) we checked our legs and found no difference barring red pinpricks in the skin and decided it was going back. We then started laughing and joking about how it must feel to epilate around the groin area - we couldn't even begin to imagine the pain, it must be like torture; we have ways of making you talk - you get your pants pulled down and a gloved mad doctor walks towards you with the epilator buzzing in his hand. We'll tell you all you need to know!

We were about to give up when my baby said let's try the shaver head - the epilator has got a changeable head to turn it into a shaver, what a mighty fine call. Now perhaps, as girlfriend mentioned admittedly, our body hair is not long enough to use the epilator on (that's so gay isn't it? Two guys with shorter body hair than girls!) but that begs the question it must hurt more to epilate longer hair surely? Not that we'll ever know because to keep it in trim we'll just use the shaver head regularly because we won't be sending it back now; even though the epilator head is useless and painful, the shaver head is worth the money all on its own. It does an awesome job, seriously awesome - so quick, so painless and such quality results; it's left us both with seriously smooth skin, absolutely flawless. Oh my gosh, just awe inspiring results, both of us were impressed to some tune with the results, it was that good that we couldn't keep our hands off each other once we'd finished.

The whole process made us both so horny anyway, it always does; naked and at the submission of one another, and it's left us with such silky smooth kissable skin that we couldn't resist kissing each other bodies. Some parts got more attention than others admittedly but still and my baby teased me until I thought I was going to explode; if that wasn't bad enough he made me beg him to shag me, which truth be told turns us both on so much. It was worth begging for anyway, oh my gosh and he made me feel like a creme egg - full of thick, gooey liquid inside. It must be Easter..............

First

2010-04-04T20:03:00.001+01:00

We're back playing catch up again, there was no post last night because my baby and I were busy; we were both working yesterday and after tea we decided to go for a few beers out in Straightville - it wasn't planned, it was completely off the cuff and it was great, even for Straightville it was great. It seems its all been work, work, work lately; perhaps because it has on my part at the very least, although my baby he's been working a fair few Saturdays of late too. My baby's enjoying a couple of days off now, he was working Good Friday and yesterday but he's not back in work until Tuesday and then it's a short week until our first weekend off together in four weeks - my first days off in four weeks, yes I'm working straight through Easter - no rest for the wicked; I must have been particularly wicked! My baby says I'm only wicked in the bedroom, in everything else I'm as good as gold, just one big softie; and he's right, although I'm unsure of the good as gold bit, I am one big soft hearted gay-boy, there's no doubt about that.........

Now we don't normally share on here what we buy each other for personal gifts, that's just way too personal, but we're going to break that code this time; with Easter we decided to not go mad, just buy each other an egg or something and have done with it - it's hardly at the top of the major gift list; besides we buy each other little gifts throughout the year, if we see something whilst we're out and about either on our own or together and think it would suit then we treat each other. It just keeps our love alive and our relationship strong, a surprise gift every now and then, a gift for no reason other than to say I love you, well it's just so romantic, utterly romantic. I was in Marks and Spencer yesterday buying a sandwich for lunch and I saw one such gift for my baby; admittedly it was kind of left field and I wasn't at all sure what his reaction would be but I just couldn't help myself - it just hit me as so romantic. So I bought it, as an extra Easter gift for my baby, and despite our agreement to not go mad, as already mentioned I couldn't help myself.

I was hoping to get home first last night, so I could hide it away, so it would be a surprise for today because if my baby was home there was no way I could possibly sneak it into the house; I'd no idea how or where I could hide it because that would have been kind of difficult truth be told, but in the end it didn't matter, my baby was home first. His car was parked outside as I approached, hoping against hope my baby may have been upstairs so I could get in and make good the hide, I opened the front door and my baby walked through from the kitchen; I was caught red handed! My baby immediately noticed what I was carrying and proclaimed they were beautiful before asking if they were for my Mum and enquired as to why I didn't tell him they were due for a visit. He took them from me to take a closer look and said once again they were beautiful, before asking again who they were for? I just stood there watching my baby holding this gift, obviously enthralled by it with a big smile lighting up his face and I just knew, I just knew I'd made the right choice. It was a beautiful moment that caught me right in the heart, time seem to slide by in slow motion and a tear fell and trailed down my cheek, followed by another and another.............

I'd bought my baby some flowers, he put the flowers down and proceeded to wipe away my tears whilst asking me what was up; I told him the flowers weren't for my Mum or for anyone else apart from him, I'd bought them for him. There followed a look on my baby's face, one I can't even describe apart from the fact it was like when the truth doesn't really sink in, you bought them for me he asked, no one's ever bought me flowers, they're beautiful. That was it, the tears just flooded from my eyes whilst my baby kissed and cuddled me, all the while trying to help stop and dry my tears, but each time he said something about how much he loved me and the flowers, I started again. We kissed and cuddled until my tears were replaced by a smile, a smile that grew and grew as I watched the care and attention my baby took in taking the flowers from the carrier bag, making sure they were watered and fed, and how he gently touched and handled them before placing them in the lounge. I confessed it was the first time I'd ever bought flowers for a guy and I wasn't sure how my baby would react, then again I've never loved any other guy as much I love my boyfriend; and it was just the most beautiful sight to know they were received as I hoped they would be - as a token of my love and affection, I'm so happy they meant so much.

I love you to bits baby, Happy Easter xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Good Friday

2010-04-02T23:35:00.000+01:00

It sure has been boys and girls, it's been and continues to be a very good Friday indeed, gosh how I absolutely adore days like these. Which is an unusual statement because I've been working and working the late finish; and my baby's been working too - it was a shorter day for him, he finished at 3 o'clock; but still we've been apart. My day, although quiet, flew by, I've literally no idea why the time went, it wasn't like it was busy or I was busy but the day disappeared in a flash. The skies were mostly grey, overcast and filled with rain but some people just bring out the sunshine, even when there's no sun to be found above me, I can feel its warmth and see its light.

My breaks were punctuated by text upon text - lots of texts back and to between my baby and I, silly texts, funny texts, loving texts and everything in between; to be honest it would have been easier and quicker to phone each other, but there's just something so twee about text messages. Sending one off, waiting for the reply and we both think that it's just beautiful to sit there and read the loving, caring, sweet variety of messages we often send to each other; just letting the words sink in - we both think it's romantic. I sat in the office during the quiet times today and read the texts we'd sent earlier again - that's where my sunshine was, it cheers my World up, it cheers my baby's World up and it made the distance we were apart seem not so distant. On my last break girlfriend joined in too and I sent her a text that must have took her ages to read it was that long; we'd only seen each other yesterday but I had plenty to say for myself. As ever it was great to hear from girlfriend and she confirmed something that just blew me away; I heard that when girlfriend left she asked a friend to look after me and take care of me in her absence, it was true. I can't think, even my baby can't think, of a more kind, thoughtful and caring gesture; seriously, I mean, I don't know, it just means so much and it tells its own tale of our love and friendship.

With being on a late finish my baby and I would normally be spending the night apart but not tonight boys and girls, we're where we should be and where we're at our happiest - together. My baby started sending me such lovely texts towards the end of my shift, telling me he was starting tea and asking me to hurry on home because he couldn't wait to see me; I got so excited, it was so silly, innocent and beautiful - I mean my baby knows I'm a hopeless romantic but he doesn't just do things like that because I like it, he does it because he wants to, stuff like that just means everything. Upon my return home the house smelt wonderful, my baby was busy putting the finishing touches to homemade chile con carne in the kitchen; oh my gosh it smelt divine and what a welcome home. I didn't even have to time to take a shower, it was a quick wash and change of clothes before I joined my baby in the kitchen to help cook the rice. We had great fun - kissing, cuddling, touching, laughing, talking and joking whilst the rice boiled away; we even had just enough time for a dance together before tea was served.

It's the first time my baby has cooked chile con carne for me and it was awesome, stupidly awesome; it wasn't a hot, spicy taste instead it was real mild and like a layer of different tastes. Tomatoes, onions, garlic, worcestershire sauce, cracked black pepper - a myriad of flavours that worked so well together, it was unlike any chile I've ever tasted, it was the best chile I've ever tasted. My baby got the recipe from Rach, she's cooked it for him in the past and he was so blown away with it that he learnt how to make it for me; which in itself is such a sweet gesture. My baby served it with the rice and flat bread warmed in the oven, it's the first time I've ever had flat bread with chile and it's absolutely perfect for mopping up the sauce or piling a mound of chile on and devouring it. It really was sublime - the food, the thought and care that went into it, the moment, just everything; the best way to start a Friday evening after coming home from work. Kisses and cuddles were well and truly deserved, and my baby received lots of them, I don't think I could have ever given him enough to show my appreciation and love but I tried my best.

I've been a real chatterbox tonight too, wrapped up in my baby's arm on the sofa, I've been talking like a train, way more than normal. Talking, laughing and joking about anything and everything that's on my mind; it's all just spilled from my mouth and kept my baby entertained. He cuddles me real hard when I say something sweet or silly about him and tonight I've made up lots of silly names for him, just different variations along the lines of boyfriend and baby. Each time I felt his arms close around me I looked up to catch his eye and see his smile, and I was rewarded with a kiss. As the kisses became more frequent and started to linger I turned around to face my baby, he pulled me close into his body, so close that I could feel everything and forgot everything just the same. Hands strayed, touched and clasped; and I just wanted my baby so bad - so, so bad. It's been a good Friday......................

Only one

2010-04-01T23:56:00.000+01:00

I wrote last night about how true friends remain by your side regardless, it was nothing but the truth because it has been proven. Girlfriend texted me last night just to make sure I was okay; I guess with the tears and the sadness from earlier in the day, she wanted to be sure I felt better. It was such a kind and sweet gesture, and just so pure; I mean it should have been me being strong for her, after all she was the one encountering the rough end of the stick but no. I was the one that needed comforting and needed to have my tears dried; it's nothing new boys and girls - I do get emotional and I do cry a great deal but it's usually my baby that helps dry my tears. I need friends around me who are not only strong enough to support me through my times of need but are also gentle enough to not upset me further; and I am truly blessed because I have many. My boyfriend and my girlfriend well, they're with me most of the time and they're often the ones I look to during both the good and the not so good times - thankfully we encounter mostly good times! But still, it blows me away and I never take such times for granted, never..........

My baby cheered me up last night and continued to do so today; throughout the day he phoned and texted me, once again ensuring that I was okay; and it was a strange day but to hear my baby's voice and read his kind, caring, loving words - they made all the difference. It was a comfort and he told me to phone or text him for whatever reason, if there was anything on my mind and I needed to talk about it he would listen - as he always does; and I'm crying now just thinking about it as I did when he told me. Oh gosh, please excuse me a minute. I'm just so cared for and loved, I don't know what it means, honestly I don't understand how when you meet someone new it ends up a year or so down the line like this, how we are in the here and the now. I'm not trying to analyse it, it's just that, something just clicks into place I guess and you find a beautiful boyfriend or a gorgeous girlfriend there, always there; my brain fails to grasp that notion, it always has done. You know I just take the people I truly love at face value, I don't look beyond what I see because if they're true then there's nothing to see beyond, it's all there looking back at me; and I just see that every time when I look at my baby (I can't say that for girlfriend because it's a different kind of love.) Perhaps that's the notion I fail to comprehend, because it is so simple and obvious, because it's literally staring me in the face, maybe that's how I fall in love, it probably is. Whatever, it's a beautiful feeling both whenever we're together but more importantly when I'm looking forward to being with my baby, be it whilst at work or when we've been apart a night or two - the thought of being with him just sends shivers down my spine. And my baby's making me cry again, I'm not going to share what he just said but it was just so touching; man I'm so emotional tonight.

Girlfriend visited today during lunch, it was a fleeting visit unfortunately but it was just so good to see her; less than 24 hours since we last saw each other admittedly but way long enough time apart. I miss her, I can't help that and I'm not ashamed to admit it - my baby's said on many occasions to miss someone is a another way of saying you love them; he speaks so much truth because it's nothing but the truth. Talking of which, girlfriend left such a beautiful comment on last nights post which touched not only me but my baby as well - my baby loves to hear others speak of me in the same fashion as he does; which is something I do understand, my heart sings whenever I hear any of my baby's friends speak of him in a similar fashion. But there was something wrong with girlfriends comment last night and I cannot let it pass without correcting it. You see she referred to herself as my No1 girlfriend and that's so untrue, it's way off the mark because whilst she's a part of my life there is no number one girlfriend, there's only girlfriend, my girlfriend - the only girlfriend this gay-boy will ever need.

I wrote you a poem earlier tonight girlfriend, it's called Ghosts, it's on my other blog - Blinded By Nothingness, I hope you don't mind and I hope you like it. I'm happy, I love my girlfriend and I love my boyfriend; my life is blessed. Goodnight, with love xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Not goodbye

2010-03-31T20:22:00.001+01:00

It was girlfriends last day at work today, it's a day I've not been looking forward too for so long - we knew it was coming, we knew it was imminent and I thought I was prepared for it. My baby and I have talked about it in the days leading up to today - he's been my rock, as ever; because I've been trying to avoid talking about it, because it upsets me. When stuff affects me in a bad way that's my way of dealing with it, to bottle it up and suppress it; and although I know it doesn't help in any way, shape or form - it's just my way. My baby also knows how I operate and he's made me talk about it and made me get it out in the open - he knows how much girlfriend means to me and he knew I would struggle. My baby's helped, he's helped me so much and without wishing to sound like a drama queen; I would have struggled to some tune without him by my side, to give me love, support and an outlet. That's not an exaggeration of the truth by any means......

When we left for work this morning I promised my baby I wouldn't cry today, it was a silly promise to make; and although my baby didn't say anything at the time, he knew, he just knew - it wasn't a surprise for any of us. To be honest I was doing so well - laughing, joking and smiling until early afternoon when I got a call to go back to my office. Girlfriend had bought me some leaving gifts and well, the gravity of the situation, it's imminency and just the kindness, thoughtfulness and love they represented tore me up. Girlfriend found me sat in the office crying, I could do nothing else but cry and I could pretend to be the big tough guy but that's not me boys and girls, I wouldn't even know where to begin.

I guess that's where our friendship started - I didn't have to pretend to be anything but my true self with girlfriend, she just accepted me for who I was. I hadn't even come out as gay at work then but she gave me the confidence, support and love to make me realise that it wasn't such a big step to take; and if people didn't love me for who I was than they weren't a true friend anyway. We've stuck together through thick and thin ever since, sure there's been a few bad times but we've always come through it, mostly unscathed and still smiling; and the good times far outweigh the bad. It's a measure of true friendship boys and girls, often those you think are your friends will disappear during the bad times, it's the ones that are still standing by your side regardless of the situation that you should treasure. True friends don't come along too often in this life...........

My baby reminded me tonight that it should be a time of celebration and not of sadness, a celebration of all the fun times we've had, of all the happy memories we've made together. He's right and there are many happy memories, memories that wouldn't have been made without girlfriend, there are so many reasons to celebrate and be thankful for. This blog is littered with such memories, girlfriend lives and breathes through so many of the posts found on here, some quite obviously and others not so but she's there. These are memories of her, memories of us - a gay boyfriend and a straight girlfriend; who'd have thought we'd have lasted for nigh on a year and a half? And this is not the end, and this is not goodbye, and this is not the lasting memory on which our friendship will be judged because I don't want a day like today to be the finale, it was way too painful for that purpose. I'm worth more than that and girlfriend is worth more than that, our friendship is worth more than tears shed in sadness; here's to happier times and a new set of memories just waiting to be made.

For you girlfriend - from two boyfriends who love you very much. May your journeys always be safe and may the roads we travel cross often xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

"You stole my dreams and you made me see that I could walk into the sun and I could still be me............."

Sixty minutes

2010-03-29T21:47:00.000+01:00

It seems like I'm forever playing catch up with this blog lately boys and girls, well certainly the past couple of days or so; how are we all by the way? Good I hope? There's a dear friend of mine who isn't so good at the moment, which is not good news, I hope better times go their way soon, keep my friend in your thoughts boys and girls, please. My baby and I are apart tonight, I was working until late and my baby he had some stuff to do back at his flat; but it's no great shakes, it should be the only night we're apart this week - I do not complain, it's all happy days. Now do you want to know the real reason why the blog hasn't received a great deal of attention this weekend? In one word - sex...............

Now I don't know what's up with me lately but I've been seriously horny and I don't use the word lightly, I mean it, I've been way worse than normal; and I was thinking of saying we've been so horny so I could blame my baby too but it's been mostly me. My baby's always risen to the occasion and has never complained nor turned down the opportunity but for the most part I've instigated and lead on throughout the weekend. It's all I've had on my mind, it's all I've wanted to do - to get dicked, laid, shagged rotten; it's like some kind of disorder taking over my life, I've got OCD for sex! From getting up in the morning until going to bed at night, that's right even early in the morning, it's been that bad. When I left my baby in bed to get ready for work over the weekend all I wanted to do was climb back in bed with him and have sex; no wonder my baby was so welcoming of the sleep in! Saturday night in particular I was insatiable, and man did I get it but soon after I wanted more; and soon after that I paid for it............

The clocks went forward one hour during the early hours of Sunday morning and to be honest sixty minutes really shouldn't make all that difference, but it did. I guess along with our late night sexual diversions it took its toll, and it took it big time because Sunday I was dead on my feet. I don't think I've ever been so tired in all my life, I was absolutely shattered and drained, it was an effort just to concentrate and walk it was that bad; and it certainly wasn't any good to find myself feeling like that whilst at work. The day dragged on and on, it was horrible and to say home time came as a welcome relief was somewhat of an understatement to say the least! I dragged my weary body home, walked in through the front door and well, I could have cried - not only was my baby there to welcome me with a smile, a kiss and a cuddle but tea was on the go. If that wasn't enough, in between my baby visiting his folks he'd taken advantage of the nice weather and done all the washing - clothes, bedding, towels the lot; everything was clean, fresh, ironed and put away. It blew me away, totally and utterly blew me away - my baby thought nothing of it, he said it was a nice day and decided to do the laundry. I guess he saw the look on my face because he asked if he'd done anything wrong, I couldn't answer him, I'd have choked on my tears if I'd have tried; instead I just took hold of him, cuddled and kissed him. It was his thoughtfulness that did me, not only to do all that he'd done but to then ask if he'd done anything wrong when he saw that I was kind of speechless; he's just so caring, kind and selfless, I don't know it still blows me away.

We had tea, we cuddled up on the sofa and I fell asleep in my baby's arms; I woke up around an hour later with my baby still cuddling me. I woke up to a smile and a kiss, I woke up feeling better, I woke up feeling so loved; I woke up in the arms of the guy I love - my baby he waited for me..............

Trade descriptions act

2010-03-28T21:36:00.001+01:00

My baby's been off this weekend whilst I, as ever, have been working - or so it seems, it's only been a fortnight since our last weekend off together, my baby was working last Saturday so we've not really missed a great deal; but still it seems like a long time ago. Whatever, all that matters is that we've seen and continue to see each other almost every night; but still it kind of hurt a little knowing my baby was off and I couldn't spend the days with him, it wasn't envy it was just that I wanted to be with him so much, we adore whiling away our days together - laughing, smiling, kissing, cuddling and holding hands. Gosh I love my baby so much, sometimes the feeling is so bittersweet when we're apart that it hurts..............

I was up early Saturday morning for work whilst my baby was afforded the luxury of a sleep in; and as ever he looked so beautiful and so fragile whilst sleeping soundly - I've honestly never in my life seen a guy look so angelic whilst asleep. I went into the bathroom to get ready for work and upon my return to the bedroom I just stood there in silence watching him; it ripped my heart out, no joke, it's so easy to fall in love when there's a vision of pure beauty asleep in your bed - so very easy xoxoxoxoxoxoxox. I gently kissed him, it was so soft that my baby didn't move a muscle, he was a World away, if there are any benefits to being apart on a Saturday then that was it, to witness my baby at his most fragile. I headed off to work and left it a couple of hours before texting him to tell him just how beautiful he looked whilst sleeping and asked if he remembered me kissing him before I left. He told me he knew then why he woke up so happy, he thought he was dreaming, except it was too good to be a dream; he almost made me cry........

My baby spent the day with Rach, they went into Manchester together to do some shopping and have lunch; it was a beautiful day weather wise for them and the thought of them spending time together made me so happy. They're real good friends, seriously best mates and I appreciate that they don't see each other as much as they used to; but they take such good care of each other it just makes me smile - they're friendship is transparent, it's beautiful. Throughout the day my baby and Rach kept me updated on what they were doing, where they'd been and where they were heading to next. It was obvious they were having such fun and it made me feel that I was a part of it, like I was with them; I told them too - during my lunch break I phoned my baby up for a realtime update, so I could hear his voice and to tell him that I loved him. I thanked them both for brightening my day up with their text updates - it took me away from my work for a while and to a better place.

Late afternoon I received another text, my baby told me he'd bought me a gift; I sent one back to thank him, telling him there was no need and asking what it was. He said there was every need because he saw them and immediately thought of me, he could not pass them by without buying them; but he didn't tell me what he'd bought. I phoned him up, begged and pleaded whilst he teased me rotten until eventually he told me - he'd bought me a pair of shorts; oh my gosh they must be a pair of silky, smooth nylon shorts I enquired. They weren't, they were cotton I was informed, but despite the boring fabric I was assured that I'd love them when I saw them; and as my baby has got impeccably good taste I did not doubt it. Besides he said he couldn't wait to see me in them which made me think that they were a pair of shorts to get horny in; neither of us were wrong..............

To call them a pair of shorts is slightly misleading, so to sell them as a pair of shorts is surely contravening the Trade Description Act because to be a pair of shorts, well they've surely got to consist of some kind of material. And yes they're indeed made of cotton but very little of it, in fact they're the shortest pair of shorts either of us have ever seen in our life; to put it in perspective they're shorter than hot pants. We didn't think you could get any shorter than hot pants without going into underwear territory, but you can, quite evidently you can......

I fully understand why my baby had to buy them for me when he saw them because not only are they horny to wear but they make my baby so horny when I'm wearing them too; they leave very little to imagination. My baby says they're provocative and inviting, he doesn't need an invitation, he's always welcome and I always ensure the welcome is warm........

The closer the better.....

2010-03-26T20:19:00.001Z

Good evening boys and girls, I trust you're all happy and well? My baby and I are fine, despite the complete lack of posts, we're just fine; I had a restful mind last night, just so relaxed that it didn't even occur to me to blog. I guess, it's been in the reflection of our posts lately - there's been few really funny posts where we trade our humour off one another and turn a seemingly innocent post into something completely different. Instead it's, for the most part, being real heartfelt, romantic, I love my baby and he loves me kind of posts; and we do, we love each other so much - it makes us both happy, relaxed and carefree. That's where the blog's been at because that's where our life is at, I don't know why we explain this to you but we do, perhaps so you can share in our love, maybe a little bit of our love will rub off onto you, we hope so - honestly we do........

Barring the obvious, last night we just cuddled up so close on the sofa and watched television; that's where my mind was lost, that's where I was lost - lost in my baby's warm, safe and loving arms. You know I was literally using him as a pillow, I was lay in between his legs and pretty much resting the rest of my body on his upper body; I just adore being so close to him. We watched television and talked, I'd tilt my head back to look up at my baby and he took such opportunities to kiss me, each time after he kissed me he smiled, and I could have cried; it was beautiful. To see the guy I love so happy and contented, it means so much; I guess that could be selfless love - as long as my baby's happy then so am I, but it's more than that because I'm so happy too, it fills my heart to the brim with love.

We were watching QVC last night, I mean if you couldn't tell we're gay already with being boyfriends, lay in each others arms whilst kissing and cuddling; then watching QVC together would surely do it. Who else watches QVC and has a membership other than housewives and gay-boys? My baby and I have both got memberships, honestly even my baby, although he's never bought anything for himself, he's bought gifts for his Mum and stuff on there. We don't watch it all the time, in fact we hardly ever watch any television but we tuned in at the right time last night. After a while Today's Special Value came on and from my half dreamlike state I suddenly came to life; oh my gosh look at that babes, do you think it's suitable for guys, do you think I need one, will it do a good job? I was asking my baby all sorts of questions, questions he obviously couldn't answer because he had the same amount of knowledge about the product as me - none! My baby dared me to phone through and speak to the presenters live on television so I could get my questions answered; he wanted me to do it so much and said he'd record it if I did, it could have been my sixty seconds of fame - the emphasis on could have been because I chickened out. I became all shy and bashful again................

We watched the presentation and the more I saw of it, the more I wanted it and the more my baby wanted me to have it; so much so that he said he'd buy it for me. It was an epilator....

If nothing else it looked quicker, easier and gave better results than our current method, and as my baby shaves me - it's him doing all the work, we bought one together. I couldn't let my baby pay for it all on his own despite him so kindly offering to, so we split it and paid half each; besides my baby may try it out too. We bought it more for the legs, arms and chest area rather than our intimate areas; as you may have read the last time we shaved my baby shaved my whole body. It was awesome, we both loved the results, my skin was so silky smooth and tactile; to touch and feel my baby's touch against it, it's like nothing else, incredibly horny. My baby's not gone that far yet and allowed me to shave him all over, I say yet because our new epilator may just swing the balance; all we have to do is wait for it to be delivered.

Fingers crossed it will deliver even better, longer lasting results than shaving alone; as soon as it arrives and we try it out we'll let you know. Hopefully it will let my baby and I get closer to each other whilst cuddling, even if it's only by a hairs width, it all counts - the closer together the better.........

Fishy fingers

2010-03-24T19:45:00.000Z

It's so good to see my baby again, just wonderful to be back in his arms; I just love to be loved, to feel loved, to be kissed, cuddled and held tightly in my baby's arms - I've missed him so much. We were apart Monday and Tuesday with me working late shifts again and there's a common theme emerging when we're apart - I don't sleep well at all when I'm in bed on my own. I don't know why because I've always been a real good sleeper but lately I have noticed it when I'm alone, I can go to bed feeling tired but it takes me a long while to finally fall asleep. When we're together, there's not a problem, I don't know, maybe the bed is more inviting with my baby in it? I don't mean that sexually either, but the bed just feels so much more warm and inviting from my baby's body heat - he's seriously hot stuff; and I love the lack of space when he's in bed next to me, when there's not as much room to stretch out and toss and turn. I love feeling his body close to mine - brushing against each other, our legs intertwined or best of all when he cuddles me so close into him; I can't help but feel so safe and protected, it puts me immediately at ease. Besides I miss my goodnight kisses, I miss those so much, there's so much comfort to be found in a kiss goodnight.............

As you may have noticed I didn't post last night, with working late by the time I'd sorted myself out - got showered, changed and had something to eat the night had gone; I just couldn't find the time. But I did find the time to talk to my baby, we talked for ages on the telephone again, and once again it was about everything and nothing; or truth be told it was a conversation of sweet nothings, gosh how I love our late night telephone conversations when we we're apart and during such times I do tend to become so much more of a hopeless romantic, way more than usual. I mean we said nothing different than if we'd have been together it's just that we only had each other in voices connected by a telephone signal - in my mind it does just paint it as desperately romantic and I guess it influences my mind. Whatever, my baby said last night and has just reconfirmed it now - he said it was beautiful and he loves to listen to me speak without fear from the heart, I'm at my most beautiful then. Oh gosh that's so sweet babes, it's brought a tear to my eye, oh man just give me a minute, that really has hit home.........

I almost cried this morning at work, I was sat having a morning coffee with girlfriend and Gill; and I honestly can't recall what we were talking about - it was still early, but I guess some part of it must have concerned my baby because I said out loud, I love my baby. It was just an outburst of affection for him that came straight from the heart and as I said it I could feel my eyes filling up, it was nothing but the undiluted truth. My baby got offered a job yesterday by my Regional Manager too, it was indirect, but an offer of employment all the same. He came to visit site and whilst we were talking in the office he noticed the photo of my baby on the wall and asked who he was. I told him it was my boyfriend and he asked if he wanted a job with us, I texted my baby after he'd gone to ask him and at first he thought that I was winding him up, when it eventually sank in that it was the truth my baby thought about it for five seconds and then declined the offer. I don't blame him, he's better off where he is, he's treated better, paid better and he loves his job and is very good at it - he makes me very proud, honestly he really does make me proud. To see him all dressed up ready for work - so cute, so handsome and so confident; he not only looks the part but he walks it too and it always strikes me as some kind of contradiction because I look upon him as something so beautiful, fragile and loving. It's not a contradiction at all, it's just the subtle differences between work mode and boyfriend mode, I know him intimately as my boyfriend and the way my baby takes such loving care of me - I can't equate that to anything outside of our relationship. Whatever, he looks so hot when he's dressed for work and I know I've said it before but I'll say it again, I've absolutely no idea why my baby isn't hit on all the time whilst in and around Manchester; he's the best looking guy there, 100% drop dead gorgeous eye candy! Not that I complain about this, far from it boys and girls; and my baby's telling me I'm too kind with my appraisal of him but it's the other way around babes - it's an understatement. It's everybody else's loss and my gain anyway, I appreciate beauty is in the eye of the beholder but still, Manchester must be blind! My baby says it doesn't matter anyway, we've got each other and that's all that really matters; you can be anyone at all personally but when you're together with that special someone nothing else matters. That's nothing but pure poetry, that's beautiful, why does it take me a thousand words to convey what you say in a sentence babes?

Anyway we had an awesome tea tonight, stupidly awesome and it was Dave's fault. I was speaking to Dave yesterday and he told me he was having a kiddies tea that night, it kind of threw me some, a kiddies tea? Like fish fingers, chips and beans - that's a kiddies tea; oh my gosh it hit me straight away, what a top tea; we've not had a tea like that in the longest of times, in fact since my baby and I have been together I don't think we've had such a tea like that. We have now, I was so looking forward to it, ever since my conversation about it yesterday I've been so looking forward to it. I talked to my baby about it last night when we spoke and he was the same, what a top idea; my baby texted me again today about it and a crazy level of excitement surrounded the whole thing. It was so bad my baby texted to tell me not to start tea until he got home so he could help because he wanted to be a part of it; no joke! Not that I minded, despite it being one of the easiest meals in the World to cook, I didn't mind the help; in fact I love it when we cook together in the kitchen. It's just such fun and it's another thing I find so romantic; tonight we had riotous fun - laughing, joking, kissing and cuddling as we went. If the cooking was the fun element then the sitting down to eat was the indulgent element; it was ridiculously tasty - I mean stupidly so, it was so good that it didn't make sense. We eat out in half decent restaurants quite a lot together, we can both cook reasonably well (excuse us we've been in bits here over a typo, absolute hysterics, I misspelt cook as cock - we can both cock reasonably well! I didn't notice it, it was my baby that burst out laughing and he made it much worse by his comments - he said he's got a reasonably good sized cock and I take cock reasonably well; not only that but the reason I didn't notice the typo is because I've got cock on the brain. I replied by saying I hope I physically have cock on the brain soon, the rest was just childish laughter) and we've both got seriously good appetites so why does fish fingers, chips and beans rock our World? The answer - fish fingers and beans in between two slices of bread and butter, it's the food of the gods, enough said!

Everything

2010-03-22T22:21:00.002Z

As you may have noticed there was no post last night and there was no post for one very good reason, and that's because we were busy and to be perfectly honest I didn't want to spoil the moment. In fact blogging was the last thing on my mind, just about everything escaped my mind last night because everything was just blissful. And I'm not talking about sex either, although we did have sex and that in itself was indeed utterly blissful, you'd all get worried if we weren't having sex - we'd get worried if we weren't having sex. But it wasn't what made the night, it helped but it didn't make it............

It was, as always, the little things that made it - things they may sound silly to anyone outside of our relationship, things that don't really add up to much but their hidden meanings and messages, well, they just mean everything. My baby asked to shave my head last night, my hair needed shaving and I was going to do it myself as I always do and always have done for many years but last night my baby asked if he could do it. Of course I let him and this is going to sound so silly but it was just a beautiful experience, it was honestly so beautiful - I sat there whilst my baby went to work with the clippers. I guess what got me the most was the fact that he took such great care and attention whilst doing it, I was sat in a chair whilst he shaved away, whilst he talked and joked with me throughout - he made a mundane task such fun and so loving. He was talking about whatever came into his mind and I just sat there listening to him going on; my baby seems to talk more when he's either really concentrating on something or when he's totally relaxed and carefree - maybe last night it was both, but whatever it was it was just divine. I was smiling to myself until one point my baby said, this is good fun I think I'll do this for you every week babes, will you let me? I started laughing, not at my baby nor at his question, but it just tickled me; it was just so innocent and twee, right there in that moment everything I love about him just shone through. He was stood behind me but noticed me laughing and without saying another word he craned his neck around my shoulder so we met face to face before asking did I say something funny? So I told my baby I just love to listen to him talking on and that it could only be him that made cutting hair such a fun and loving experience. He smiled, he giggled, he kissed me and he disappeared from view as he continued shaving and talking; once complete he stood back to admire his handy work and I heard him say you look good babes, I love guys with baldy heads. That was it, I was sat there in fits of laughter and I swivelled in my chair to see my baby stood there with the clippers in his hand laughing too - it was the way he said it, you look good babes, I love guys with baldy heads. He grabbed my head from behind and placed a big wet, sloppy kiss right on top of it before he walked round to face me and kissed me properly. It wasn't meant to be a joke he said, I do love guys with baldy heads, I love you and he started giggling to himself again; then he came back for a second kiss, and a third kiss and a............... The kisses led to the bedroom and the bedroom led to sex.......................

Afterwards we shared a piping hot black pepper bubble bath, oh my gosh and it was so hot, my baby tried to get in first - he put a foot in and promptly took it out before bemoaning the fact that it was too hot. I told him to stand aside whilst a real man took the lead, it was the wrong statement in hindsight, I gingerly placed a foot in the bath before removing it at the speed of light a millisecond later whilst screaming like a big girl. My baby began laughing whilst telling me I told you it was hot and said you're so tough babes, we best find a real man because we're just too gay for the job - the bathroom filled to bursting point with the sound of our laughter! Eventually we both managed to slowly get in the bath, it was worth the time and the effort because it was awesomely relaxing to feel the piping hot water soak away any remnants of tension. We washed and scrubbed each other clean, we kissed, we caressed and we messed about blowing bubbles and splashing each other; it was glorious and I know as a matter of the fact that the smile that lit up my baby's face was an exact reflection of mine, just to see my baby smiling, happy and enjoying himself, it's everything.

We dried each other down which was once again a horny experience all on its own before applying black pepper body lotion to each other, which goes beyond horny in both respects. To feel my baby caressing my body with the light, smooth, silky lotion; it doesn't need any further explanation does it? And to feel my hands moist with body lotion caressing his sexy skin, well the same rules apply; we ended up snogging right there in the bathroom, both naked, both horny - we snogged and caressed for ages, absolutely ages, if we'd have gone any further it would have been a waste of time having a bath. Eventually we dressed and retired to the lounge - there were two large glasses of brandy on the coffee table, music softly playing on the stereo and two boyfriends cuddled up on the sofa. It was everything a Sunday night should be, it was everything a loving relationship should be and it was everything I've ever wanted to be........

Fertiliser

2010-03-20T19:55:00.001Z

I've been so hungry today on two fronts, seriously hungry, it's felt like I've not eaten for days; right throughout the day just hungry - breakfast and dinner didn't cure my hunger pangs, even after both of them I was still hungry. I don't know but maybe we've invented a new diet regime, it's got nothing to do with eating less but everything to do with having a incredibly healthy and active sex life - we're going to call it shag yourself thin and we're sure it'll be way better, more fun and interesting than anything Paul McKenna can do. As a bonus it's a diet regime you can stick to, you aren't going to get bored of it after a couple of weeks (my baby's telling me not to judge others by my own standards here, but to correct him it should surely read - we should not judge others by our own standards, as in have you ever turned down sex with me babes? Do you not enjoy it as much as I do? I've been told that's a silly question and it is, it doesn't require an answer, I know you absolutely love it as much as I do and in vast quantities as I do! Not that we're telling everyone to partake in gay anal sex, we're not judging you by those standards, each to their own and all - if you're straight then, well you're stupid! It's a joke boys and girls, but we honestly don't get the benefits of being straight, it just doesn't register in our minds; then again I guess straight people don't get my baby and I. Oh whatever, I've gone so far off track again....) and it doesn't cost a thing! (I've just remembered the other thing I was going to say regarding judging others, it's surely not a bad thing to say everyone should get loads of sex - as long as it's safe, legal and consensual where's the big deal? I mean it's not judgemental to say every adult enjoys sex surely? And they want as much of it as possible? Maybe it's different for girls, perhaps they don't want as much sex as guys, we don't know; but when two guys are in love, well it's the most natural thing to do most of the time!)

Anyway I was on an early shift at work today although it wasn't as early a finish as my baby, so when I got home my baby was already in and once again he's just took care of me so much. Tea was on the go again and I didn't have to do a thing; once again tea was awesome, we had a fish and chips meal deal thing from Marks & Spencer; a complete meal for two for five pounds. For stuff you just shove in the oven for twenty minutes it was seriously tasty and despite it not being overly healthy it was still healthier than the deep fried alternative from the chip shop. As mentioned I was mega hungry so not only did we have fish, chips and mushy peas but between us we demolished a six pack of barm cakes too, the whole pack gone in one foul swoop. If nothing else our appetites for food are only matched by our appetites for each other (my baby just said he loves that statement, I guess it is kind of sweet, I just wrote it on the fly and didn't pay much attention, but he's right it is sweet and true!) But dear me, hot chips on freshly buttered barm cakes, is there anything else that's so simple but so heavenly? It's no wonder we have no barm cakes left; it did the trick anyway it's cured my hunger pangs, well it's cured both our hunger pangs, for food at least............

The second hunger pang, that's easy to figure out isn't it? I mean we've kind of spelt it out above and hinted about it on here in the past, you've got it right? Well, just in case you've not - I was on my final break at work before heading home and I found myself feeling horny; you can tell when I'm feeling horny because I start touching my cock (that's if I'm alone - I touch my baby's if he's with me, he usually gets the hint that I need shagging) not like wacking one off or anything but just like pressing it and rearranging it through my trousers and stuff (why am I telling you this? My baby's laughing at my attempts to tell you that I don't sit at work wanking all day! What do you do for a living? I'm a full time gay boyfriend and a part time professional wanker. Oh gosh - my baby's down, that's tickled him as that.) So I sent my baby a text message to tell him, amongst other things, that I was feeling horny; but to put a spin on it - the I'm horny baby has been seriously overused, almost to the point of extinction; and as I found myself in a frivolous mood I reinvented the phrase. Instead I told him that my ass needed fertilising, I know it's a cracker, even I was laughing when it popped into my head. Within seconds of sending it my baby phoned me up, I don't know why because he couldn't speak, all I could hear was the sound of him laughing whilst trying to ask me to explain the text message. As plain and as matter of fact as you like I simply said I'm horny - my ass needs fertilising, he began laughing again; and then when I said could you fertilise my ass for me please in a real innocent tone, well I didn't hear him speak for the next couple of minutes. My baby's laughing set me off and when all's said and done we used a phone call just to hear each other laughing, it was a top phone call too, it wasn't a waste at all.

So not only have we invented a new diet today we've also invented a new phrase, one that we can't stop using now and it still makes us laugh; laughter is the best medicine, well perhaps the second best behind getting your ass fertilised............

And this isn't a joke, we've just searched google after finishing the post to find a photo for it and we found the one that now adorns it. Seamungus, it's had us in absolute tatters, I've not written anything for the past five minutes because we've both been eating the carpet - oh my gosh, it contains fish, seaweed and humic acid; so that's where the taste comes from!! My baby's in absolute hysterics, I told you it's true - pump my ass full of seamungus; oh such top quality, just brilliant!

Rules......

2010-03-19T20:32:00.006Z

sometimes you've just got to break them - I was on a late finish again today and late finishes usually mean a night on my own but tonight I'm not alone, tonight I have company, tonight I have my beautiful boyfriend sat by my side cuddling me whilst I write to you; it's so good, just the best feeling.............

I returned home from work, through the darkness and the rain; and to open the front door and be greeted by my baby, by his smile, by some tender words, a cuddle and a kiss it just, I don't know, he just turns a house into a home. You know, I've had a great day at work today - the weather was mighty fine, I had lots of time out and about to enjoy it, and time pretty much flew by; but still to know I'd be returning home to my baby at the end of it, it just made it so much better. It was like a little fuzzy feeling of excitement inside that grew and grew as my working day came to a close, it was just a wonderful feeling. My baby was showered and changed by the time I got home, he looked and smelt absolutely divine - the heady smell of black pepper body wash and lotion fuelled my senses whenever we got up close and personal, it really is the most wonderful smell. He was dressed down in loungewear but still he just managed to look so sexy, a pair of very light grey Brookhaven fleece track pants and a sky blue t-shirt, they just complimented each other so well and suited my baby so much - he just looked cuter than ever tonight, if that's at all possible. And the track pants oh my gosh, they're kind of slim fitting and fitted, most are kind of loose fitting but these are awesome, they've got like a wide flat waistband and a real straight cut down the leg. As a result they just flaunt what he's got front and back - his cute little butt perfectly framed and to the front, dear oh dear, it leaves absolutely nothing to the imagination - just such a beautiful, horny sight; I count my blessings boys and girls - my baby's got the most beautiful cock I've ever seen, even when it's covered by his track pants, it's beautiful. I mean that too and not only because it brings me so much pleasure but because it really is beautiful to look at; but truth be told it does make me so horny, I had urges as soon as I set my eyes upon my baby and his track pants. My urges had to wait...........

I was asked to get showered and changed because my baby was making tea tonight, so whilst I was busy upstairs my baby was busy downstairs. It was whilst I was upstairs lots of little things hit me one after the other, maybe my senses were heightened or something, or perhaps it was because I wasn't used to coming home from a late shift to find my baby home, but whatever it was it was beautiful. To walk into the bedroom and find my baby's clothes already in the laundry basket, to walk into the bathroom and find the shower still wet and the smell of black pepper in the air; there were just little traces of him everywhere and as I stepped into the shower and felt the wetness beneath my feet, where my baby had stood and showered before me, I honestly don't know. I mean I'm used to all these things already, it's nothing new but it did just feel all new and exciting again; a cute and sexy guy, a guy that I love and a guy that loves me, had been here before me and I was walking in his footprints. Whatever caused such feelings doesn't matter all that matters is the fact that it was beautiful, nothing but beautiful. I showered, dried myself off, applied the black pepper body lotion and headed back into the bedroom to get dressed. It was then the final piece of beauty hit me, my baby calling upstairs to ask if I was ready because tea was ready to be served; it was nothing and everything all at once, it blew me away.

Tea was awesome, tremendously awesome - my baby did a fry up, something we very rarely do for anything except breakfast. Bacon, sausage, egg, tomato, mushroom and potato waffles - we can't even remember the last time we had potato waffles; whenever it was it was too long ago because they are fantastic with a fry up, the perfect accompaniment. My baby bought them on a whim, he saw then in Tesco whilst he was shopping for tea and thought hey why not, it was the best call and worth the big kiss and cuddle I gave him. In fact he deserves more than a kiss and a cuddle, way more, he deserves kisses and cuddles all night long; and it's not only for the potato waffles nor for tea as a whole, but for everything he brings. My baby deserves kisses and cuddles just because, no other reason or excuse is needed, it's just because................

The best gift

2010-03-18T18:01:00.000Z

My baby's just had the best day today boys and girls, he honestly has and we've been texting and talking like mad, at every opportunity; from as soon as I got into work until leaving for home tonight, it was all about him. And so it should be, because as we mentioned last night, today is a very special - it's my baby's birthday and he's had a ball! He tries to book the day off work on his birthday but he was beaten to it this year, he was unable to book a days holiday, but still regardless of the fact that he found himself reluctantly in work, his colleagues more than made up for it. Gosh, they've treated him so well, with each and every text I got or phone call we made, it was just so evident and it meant so much, not only to my baby but to me too. To know he's happy, well and having a good day always means so much, but today in particular, well it meant the World.

The girls within his workplace absolutely love him and despite being gay he's a real ladies man in certain respects, I guess it's because he's so cute, happy and loveable - you just can't help but love him. He texted me to say he's never been kissed by so many girls in his life and it was so bad that it looked like his face was coming out in a rash with all the lipstick marks adorning it. They we're all asking what I'd bought him and he couldn't answer them because he didn't have a clue, all his presents are surprises and we didn't find the time to open them this morning. He's got a mountain of cards and I mean a serious mountain of them and as expected all the ones off his female colleagues are full of love and kisses, he's come home with a birthday cake, a bottle of brandy, aftershave, ties and socks but no pants; I mean he's got his pants on but he didn't get any new ones! Apparently they are all aware that we need no further supplies of pants, our pant collection is legendary and continues to grow - I know I couldn't help it, but it's my baby's birthday! So my baby arrived home laden with gifts and cards, it's a fine job he took the car to work today and didn't travel by train, he'd have struggled big time.

It thrilled me to see him, to know he's thought of so much and I could just tell in his face that he'd really had a brilliant day - it made me so happy to know that my baby was happy. The tales he was telling me when we eventually settled down, he said he couldn't wait to get home to tell me and he was just excited and enthralled by it all, it was magic - just pure and absolute innocence. But the best was yet to come, if I thought he was excited, enthralled and happy before, when he opened one particular gift I bought him, well it reduced me to tears - an absolute flood of tears. I've just never seen anyone so genuinely happy and grateful in my life; and as it happened to be the guy I love it took me straight over the edge; just the look on his face, his words and the broadest smile I've ever seen. It hit me so hard right in the heart and man, I'm crying about it again now just thinking about it - I've seen some beautiful things in my life but that will take some beating.

To round my baby's day off I'm taking him out for a meal tonight, this bit wasn't a surprise, the tables booked, my baby's busying himself in the bathroom, making sure he's clean and presentable then we're out of here. It's rare, if ever, I indulge in what we buy each other for special occasions - I just find that way too personal and private, it's not for public knowledge; but today, the best gift I gave my baby was happiness. Just to see him so happy and know that he's happy with me and I'm an integral part of that happiness; that's just the best gift anyone could ever bestow upon another person. Happy Birthday baby, may all our days be as happy as today - I love you to bits xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

If sex wasn't as good already..........

2010-03-17T23:13:00.000Z

........... now I get nipples! (Although to be honest I've always had nipples, but it will make sense we promise, just read on)

Here goes the grace, beauty and innocence of the previous posts and we're back on familiar ground, sorry to shatter the illusion boys and girls, were you really expecting us to talk about the weather from hereon in? When we have lots of sex and that sex is earth shatteringly good would you expect us, or anyone else for that matter not to talk about it? Saying all that my baby's just called it and once again he's so true - sex is graceful, beautiful and innocent; it's what comes naturally when two guys are in love. That's a beautiful statement babes, seriously poetic and it appears I may not be the only one who's a hopeless romantic? Would you like to share any further truths with class? Oh bless you babes, although I'm not sharing that, it was meant just for me, oh gosh I feel all girly now, I shouldn't have teased and asked. Then again I should, I love to feel loved. To continue with my baby's thoughts, the innocence of sex is the fact that it comes from a shared bond of love and there's surely no more transparent feeling than love?

Anyway, that's a photo of my nipples above, inclusive of my chest and my midriff; and there'll all super smooth and hair free. I didn't tell you did I? On Sunday my baby shaved me, all of me - arms, legs, stomach, chest, crack and sack; for the first time in the longest time the only hair I've got is on my head, oh and armpits, they'd get seriously sticky and sweaty if you shaved them! He did an awesome job too, my body is seriously smooth and boy does it turn my baby on, it turns me on too, to feel his touch and kiss across my smooth flesh - such an horny feeling! But there's something up with my nipples - they've become super sensitive, no joke; I mean I've always loved having my nipples kissed, sucked, caressed and tweaked during foreplay and sex but lately it's beyond description the pleasure I get from them. We found out by accident on Sunday morning when we indulged in some morning sex at my baby's flat; we tried for it Saturday night but we were too drunk, seriously and it proved we're human after all. I don't think we've ever had a problem having sex after alcohol before but we did, we ended up in bed messing around and that's all it was - messing around, we just ended up fooling with each other and making ourselves giddy with laughter; sex went out of the window. Mind we were particularly drunk, more so than if we'd have gone out partying, I guess it's cheaper and easier to get drunk at home? I think what normally helps when we've been out, there's the fresh air on the way home that clears the head some, gets the blood pumping through the body and eventually it pumps its way South. Hence, we get home and have drunken sex, shag away into the early hours of the morning! Whilst I'm talking about Saturday night, my left shoulder is in bits, seriously it's hurting real bad, even if I just lift my left arm it pains me; I first noticed it Sunday and it's been getting progressively worse since then. We both think I hurt it during our drunkard wrestling match on the sofa that night, after I pinched my baby's cock (I know it's a dirty trick, I never fight fair, I'm gay - which is a poor excuse seeing as though the guy I was wrestling with was my boyfriend which makes him gay too but he was fighting fair! Then again he is the aggressive top in the relationship and I'm the submissive bottom - I don't know what I'm on about either now babes, shall I stop? Okay, I've stopped! Honestly! Sorry, I'm teasing again! Love you baby xoxoxoxoxo) we ended up falling off the sofa and I guess I hurt it then, I didn't feel it at the time, but hey even a submissive gay-boy turns into Superman after a few beers! My baby's disputing this fact, in fact he's telling the truth - this submissive gay-boy turns even more gay after beer. But I've felt it since, I thought injuries were supposed to get better with time and not get worse? Still it could have been worse, I may have injured my legs and been left unable to open them, worst injury in the World or what? You would have been reading about the weather on here all the time then, in fact the weather may have started to make me horny after a while (my baby's laughing at that one, oh gosh, I love it when he laughs.)

So we woke up Sunday morning, slightly hungover and delicate but horny all the same; and as is the case when we're horny, already in bed together and naked we had sex. Now as you all know our sex life is just phenomenal, it's better than good, it leaves us both very much fulfilled and more often than not on another planet; and Sunday was no different. In fact I found it hornier just for the fact that it was in my baby's bed, I don't know why but getting laid in my baby's bed rather than mine just adds an extra dimension, like I said I've no idea why but it always does, each and every time. In fact the last time we switched was in my baby's bed, can you remember that far back babes? (We don't switch that often, why fix something that's not broken?) And I guess that had something to do with it, topping my baby in his own bed, it just makes it more horny in my mind and it was, so I bowed out on a high! Anyway my baby was giving me a real good shagging Sunday morning and we found ourselves in as close to the missionary position as two guys can be. With my baby in between my legs he stopped whilst he was inside me and we kissed before he started to play with my nipples with his fingers and thumbs. Just really gently teasing, caressing and stroking them and it drove me out of my mind, within minutes I was in tatters, gasping for air; and I blew my load in the most frenzied orgasm - it went everywhere. Just the most divine sensation to be so full of my baby whilst my nipples were being teased, it felt like there was electricity coursing through them and it spread throughout my body. We were both suitably impressed afterwards (how gentlemanly - I was suitably impressed by the way you shagged me and brought me to orgasm boyfriend! Oh gosh, just give us both a minute......) but we both put it down to circumstance or a one off or something beyond our control.

But it's not, dear me it's not, because my baby tried it again tonight with exactly the same results, he drove me out of my mind again. Except this time it was better, because (and this may get gross - you have been warned) my baby shagged the arse of me as always but this time he shot his load first, and he shot it deep inside me. So I've still got my baby inside me and he's still hard, I can feel his cum inside me and I'm in the land of bliss; then he starts with the nipple teasing again and I almost lost consciousness. Hand on heart, I swear I blacked out when I orgasmed, if I didn't it sure felt like I did and according to my baby it sure looked like I did, just beyond any kind of explanation anyone could ever hope to offer. Just beyond any kind of pleasure anyone could ever hope for, it was like a full hit of everything I could ever hope for in one go. Anyway, if you're still interested and for those who've read all this and are feeling a little disappointed that there's no weather report - it looks clear and still feels quite mild tonight. Inside I'm still warm and quite wet................

Never let them pass you by

2010-03-17T17:36:00.001Z

What a perfectly beautiful evening boys and girls; and I truly mean beautiful, like the same way I use the word to describe my baby - it really is that beautiful! The day's been a bit hit and miss weather wise, it was mostly cloudy with just glimpses of sunshine and a cool breeze blowing. However, when I left work and started my walk home the wind had dropped, the sky had cleared and although the sun had kind of set, it was real warm and pleasant; but more than that it was like everything was so still and peaceful. That's what hit me the peacefulness that surrounded me, it made the walk home such a pleasure, it's times like these that I wished I lived slightly further away from work so I could carry on walking some more. I also wished my baby didn't work so far away so he would have been home when I got home, if he did I swear we'd have gone for a walk this evening, it's a beautiful evening for a romantic stroll even if it's just a stroll through the streets of Stockport. Evenings like these should be enjoyed, they're just full of grace and beauty, take someone you love and get out and enjoy it, these days are just so beautiful don't let them pass you by - never let them pass you by. Hopefully there'll be plenty more of these evenings throughout the Summer, long hazy evenings, where we can finish work and my baby and I can get out, about and enjoy them - I'm hopelessly romantic but it really does hit me where it counts, right in the heart and soul. Fuck, I love my baby so much; and I'm sorry for swearing but trust me it needs it to emphasise the fact - I just adore being all cosy and cuddly with him; and he just makes me feel so happy, carefree and loved.

My baby will be home soon, it's bonus time really because I should have been on a late finish and so we probably wouldn't have been together tonight; that said tomorrow is a very special day so we may well have been anyway, so we could wake up together. It doesn't matter anyway, the problem has been negated and I'll be using my time well - I'm cooking properly for my baby and I tonight, nothing overly glamorous just Spaghetti Bolognese, but still. I just love cooking for my baby, I enjoy it so much, I guess it's another way of showing my love for him but it does fill me with a warm, fuzzy feeling whilst I'm busy in the kitchen. And I just get so excited when I hear his key in the door, to know he's home safe and well, when he walks in wearing his shirt and pants with a smile lighting up his face - I swear my eyes take photographs of these moments; they're so simple and so everyday but there's beauty in the simple and the everyday, uninhibited beauty. Those photographs are stored in my mind, so vivid and so colourful; I guess that's one of the reasons why our relationship continues to grow strong because we never take a moment for granted.

Never lose sight of the beauty in the simple and everyday things boys and girls because if you do you'll lose focus on what's important in life, you may lose yourself, you may lose others and you may lose your love. There's beauty everywhere..............

Opportunities

2010-03-16T21:02:00.000Z

I've been told by my baby tonight, but told off in a good way, probably the best way to get told off in the World, in fact it was just so sweet, oh gosh it was beautiful - the sentiment, the words, the feeling, everything; sometimes I'm just so glad that I do stuff because it turns out to bring even greater results, even when I'm not looking for results from my doings because it's just the truth. You know my beautiful baby boy, you know it's the truth even if you won't admit it because you're way too modest - modesty's a wonderful trait to possess anyway along with being super cute, super sexy, super loving, super caring and an all round super boyfriend; and if you've not guessed it yet I kind of fancy you! That's the biggest understatement in the World boys and girls; sure I fancy him but I fancy him big time, I fancy the pants off him, he makes me so hot; but more than that I love, cherish and adore him to smithereens.

I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

But before that (it's the Worlds longest intro to a post and the longest I love you boyfriend eulogy to boot) hasn't today been a wonderful day, a seriously beautiful warm, sunny, Spring day - just gorgeous. Not that I've seen much of it, I mean today of all days to have a day of training on new software in the office, I spent all afternoon from one until six o'clock holed up in my office; I didn't even have time for lunch. The day just passed me by, the weather just passed me by, everything barring a computer screen, some new software and a heaped load of boredom passed me by - you've got absolutely no idea how poor my attention span is boys and girls. I sat there for five hours and I don't think 90% of what I was told even managed to register, I mean if it fails to grab my attention within the first ten minutes or so then that's it, it's doomed. Just ask my baby, how bad I am at watching movies or something that requires me to sit still and concentrate for any length of time, I am so, so bad! Which says even more about my baby, I've never ever got bored of his company, he always grabs my attention span and we always have so much fun when we're together, be it staying in or going out. And the other thing I never have any problems with my attention span is sex; and trust me that can go on for some serious length of time, but I've never ever lost interest in that - that's probably due to being transported to a different World by my baby, he could shag me for days on end and I'd never get bored. I'd probably be sore and wouldn't be able to walk for weeks on end but I wouldn't be bored, never! What am I going on about.............?

So come six o'clock I managed to escape, I escaped the office and I escaped work completely, which was a bit of a bonus because I should have been working until late; but as I'd forgone my lunch and afternoon breaks I decided to claim them back in time owed right there and then. If only the thought had come to me earlier because as I was leaving work I thought oh my gosh my baby could come around now, if he's not made any other plans or already got home and settled in. I grabbed my phone and I'd got three text messages, two missed calls and two voicemail messages - mostly from my baby and a couple from my Mum; I'd not had time to check my phone since 1 o'clock and I'd missed a great deal. My baby's texts were just so sweet - one of them relating to the fact that I was going to get told off, the other asking where I was and why hadn't I replied and his voicemail, well I should have saved it, oh gosh he's such a sweetheart - it cheered me up so much and made me feel so loved all over again. I phoned him back, or I tried to anyway but as is always the way when there's something urgent it went to voicemail; and how I love leaving voicemail, I just go on and on and on for like five minutes or until the voicemail cuts me off.

My baby had been in the shower, he called me back about twenty minutes later and I told him about my day, where I'd been and why I couldn't reply to his texts or calls; I asked him if he wanted to come around due to being able to get off work earlier but it was a missed opportunity. He said he'd love to and he would have jumped at the chance but Rach was due around; they'd made plans to meet up and have tea together which was fair enough, we knew we weren't due to see each other, besides my baby hasn't spent much time with Rach of late and it would have been so unfair to break the date so abruptly. Still, there was some good news to share, I've been able to work my magic and get the early finish tomorrow - I should have been working late's again; so guess where my baby will be tomorrow night? Right here with me, that's where, oh happy days my friends, happy days! Then my baby proceeded to tell me off (which I've edited to its core principle and left out all the lovey stuff) ..........

Why didn't you tell me about the post you did last night? Because it was late. Why didn't you tell me when you texted me this morning? Because I wanted it to be a surprise, why what's up with it? Because I've never read anything so beautiful and if I'd known about it sooner it would have made my day and I would have been able to tell you earlier that I think you're the best boyfriend ever. Like I said it was the best telling off I've ever received in my life, it was just beautiful. It may not have made my baby's day but it sure made his night, it made both our nights. Goodnight xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

Three words.........

2010-03-15T23:12:00.001Z

I've had a great day at work today boys and girls but it really had nothing to do with work, in fact it had everything to do with someone who wasn't with me, well not physically anyway, but he was with me in spirit and in my thoughts all day long - I'm talking about my baby; my beautiful, my sexy, my cute boyfriend. Until meeting him I never thought it was possible to love someone so much, but it is possible and it's beautiful and life affirming. He makes me so gay, and I'm not talking about our sexual antics here, I'm talking about how he makes me feel inside - so loved, so cared for and so cherished but more pointedly how he lets me smother him with love; pure, sickly sweet, hopelessly romantic love. That's me when I'm in love, it's the real me, it's how I communicate my love - so openly, so honestly and so soppily; if we're together it's the kisses, the cuddles, the tender words and moments shared. It's difficult to find a guy that appreciates and enjoys being loved so much and who reciprocates such love in a gay relationship, well I've found it difficult anyway, it's left me blunted in the past - lost and confused. And here's where your illusions get shattered because love is way more important than sex - my baby and I wouldn't enjoy sex so much if it wasn't for the love we share; and it's no irony either, sure we have lots of sex but it's only a reflection of our love for each other, we love each other very much.

But when we're apart all we have to share are the tender words and that's exactly what we've done all day today. I started as soon as I got into work, I sent my baby such a hopelessly romantic text message wishing him a good day and telling him exactly how much I loved him because he was so heavy in my thoughts. It set me up for the day, it left me feeling all fuzzy and warm inside and just so in love - it was in the way I walked and the way I talked, it infiltrated my whole being; such a wonderful feeling. Over the course of the day and the course of our breaks at work we read and replied to each other; and it just kept me on a high throughout right up until my final break by which time my baby was heading home to his flat - work keeps us apart tonight with me being on late shifts. I headed back into my office and just gazed at the photo of my baby on the wall whilst thinking about the texts we'd just exchanged; he's just so beautiful and even though I didn't need a reminder he was there looking back at me. I texted him again to tell him just that - that I'd been gazing at his photo and that he was beautiful, I couldn't help myself besides it was nothing but the truth.

Hence why I'm late posting tonight, I've spoken to my baby for so long on the phone, we didn't have a great deal to say admittedly because we've only been apart just over twelve hours or so but still we talked for so long. But through everything, three words kept on reoccurring; through every text message and on numerous occasions throughout our telephone call the same three words. Three little words that mean nothing on there own but when you put them together and in the right order, well they mean everything...........

How gay?

2010-03-14T22:22:00.000Z

We stayed in last night, not at my house but at my baby's flat - we were due to meet Rach there, order some pizzas, drink some beers, watch a movie and slouch out on the sofa. I look forward to such nights so much, we all do because we have such great fun together - eating, drinking, talking and laughing; there's always mountains of laughter and it's always so relaxed, just three friends and time it's a wonderful combination. Talking of time, as ever despite our promises we've not seen each other in too long, it's always too long - even my baby hasn't seen her much lately due to spending the majority of time with me; we really should fix that problem, we all said that last night. We said that when we eventually got there anyway..................

We were kind of late in leaving because, well we'd not seen each other for the majority of the day, we missed each other and we were horny. We eventually left at around 8 o'clock and by this time we may not have been horny but we were starving and we still had to get to my baby's and order the food - it was a major drama for the both of us; oh my gosh we're eating late tonight and we're hungry already! Rach was waiting for us when we got there, she had been waiting a while, where've you been she asked, I thought we were meeting at 7? I looked at my baby, my baby looked at me and we both started laughing, silly question she said; don't you guys ever get bored of sex? That was it, my baby and I were in absolute fits of laughter; silly question again she said, I'll take that as a no! Thankfully a smile grew across her face and her smile turned to laughter before she admitted that she should have known better and before she asked for a hug and a kiss and where I'd been for so long. Before I could even answer she stopped me and said on second thoughts I know exactly where you've been for so long - in bed with this cheeky little monkey, whilst pointing at my baby. Cheeky little monkey, I've not heard that saying in ages and truth be told it suits my baby, it had me in fits of laughter again; just the look on my baby's face, like who me? Awesomely funny!

We settled in for the night, ordered the food and cracked open a few beers; and I've said this so many times before but still it was a magical night - I could feel so much love and friendship in the room with us, it blows me away each time. It's a special place amongst special people; my baby's lounge must have soaked up so many good memories, so much happiness and laughter that it's reflected back upon us, it's otherworldly in it's beauty. We ate, the beer flowed and we caught up on what we'd all done since we last saw each other; we watched a movie (Straw Dogs if you're interested, a good movie but it didn't justify the hype - the most notorious film in British history, banned for 30 years or something) but most of all we laughed. After the film had finished we sat around talking some more and as the beer continued to flow my baby and I became silly until we ended up kind of wrestling on the sofa; I managed to pinch my baby's cock and we ended up falling off the sofa, my baby clutching his nether regions and us both in hysterics. Our laughter was cut short by Rach shouting I don't believe it, we both turned around to face her thinking something was wrong, the laughter stopped and my baby asked her what's up? Tell me he's not wearing a thong she said, like what? During the wrestling my track pants must have slipped down or been pulled down revealing the pink triangular flash of silky material of my new string my baby had bought me. She started laughing, you are aren't you, you're wearing a thong? Not exactly it's more a g-string, you shouldn't be looking anyway, I replied; if it wasn't pink and so far up your arse I wouldn't have noticed but as it is I couldn't help it! That's so gay even for you she said, and looking at my baby she said you didn't buy them did you? My baby started laughing, you did didn't you she asked, I don't believe it you're both so gay, I knew it you're both so gay! We ended up in bits, I was literally dying on the floor with laughter and my baby took his revenge for the cock pinching by pulling my track pants down even further to reveal my string in all its glory. I couldn't do a thing about it, I was curled up on the floor hurting so much through laughing, my baby eventually had to help pull my track pants back up and help me to my feet.

So it's finally official we are both so gay which is a good job really taking everything into consideration - it's not often you see two straight guys so in love with each other is it............?

The best laid plans.......

2010-03-14T20:03:00.001Z

No post since Friday and we've both had the weekend off so what's going on? We've been very busy, stupidly busy in fact and we couldn't find anytime to post anything up here; but now we're back home and on an even keel we'll try our best to fill you in on the best bits from the weekend - we might succeed or we might fail, time will tell boys and girls!

Yesterday was somewhat fractured truth be told - my folks were due down to visit but as of Friday night they couldn't get anyone to look after their cat so it looked like the visit was cancelled. Which was a shame truth be told, I always enjoy seeing and spending time with my folks; normally they come down whilst I'm working so the time we spend is somewhat restricted; so with a weekend off it would have been perfect timing - alas it wasn't to be or was it? With this in mind my baby asked me if I'd like to join him and his Mum on a shopping trip to the Trafford Centre, he was taking her shopping for Mother's Day, to pick up some gifts. My baby had already asked his Mum if she minded me tagging along and she said if it made her son happy then it made her happy; besides she was reliably informed that I have a good eye for womenswear. Which is true, I don't wear it myself - well not anymore anyway, my baby he doesn't like me to be that feminine, he loves me because I'm a guy and he's gay, I mean he wants a guy as a boyfriend and not a guy masquerading as a girl - if he fancied girls he'd be straight; thankfully he's not! Whatever, it was just a phase I went through, it was mostly confined to the bedroom and for a guy that that kind of stuff made horny; I don't miss those days, I've moved on to bigger and better things, I fell in love with the most beautiful guy in the World and there's no comparison xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

But I do love shopping with and for girls; maybe it is my strong feminine side, I don't really know but it really is great fun. Whether it's with my Mum, with girlfriend, with Rach or whoever I have an absolute ball; I've even been known to dish out comments to girls I don't even know. When I'm out shopping with my baby, if we're walking through the ladies section of a store and I see a girl looking at a particularly nice piece of womenswear I'll head on over an tell them, seriously - there's me dragging my baby by the hand to tell some girl that looks lovely you should buy it. If I get a good response I'll go one step further and tell them I think I'l buy it myself have they got my size - whereupon I usually get pushed by my baby and told to move on! But I love choosing clothes and shopping for girls, they seem to have a much wider choice and more colourful prints and fabrics then they do for guys; besides I like to know how girls minds work and I honestly think I share a great deal in common with the opposite sex - I get on so well with straight girls, they're so much better than straight boys but not as good as gay-boys and one gay boy in particular, my super cute and super sexy gay boyfriend - I love you babes xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox. Oh gosh, I'm feeling so gay and so loved, just so loved - there's lots of kisses and cuddles coming my way at the moment; but I do I absolutely love my baby to bits, do you love me babes? I was only messing about honestly, but he does, oh gosh he does - thank you, you're so very sweet and kind...............

So we were getting ready to head out shopping Saturday morning when my Mum phones up, they'd managed to find a cat sitter and she asked if was still okay to come down. There followed a long pause, followed by a can you ring you back in a minute - plans were been rearranged hastily and on the fly. I spoke to my baby and he was fine, he'd take his Mum shopping on his own, he'd sooner have me with them but he understood and appreciated the fact that I don't see my folks that often; I told him to pass on my apologies to his Mum and that I was kind of gutted because I was really looking forward to shopping with Mother and Son, I imagine it would have been serious fun! Just after midday my folks arrived and despite my disappointment of not being able to go shopping with my baby and his Mum, it was fantastic to see them, it more than made up for any disappointment. We had some lunch, talked, joked and laughed before heading into Stockport to do some shopping; whereupon we talked, joked and laughed some more. I also indulged in my girly shopping spree after all, helping my Mum pick a top, a pair of crop pants and a couple of t-shirts; it was fantastic. We sat and had a coffee and I got told off for texting my baby all the time; my Mum asked can't you two ever leave each other alone for five minutes? The answer, well it was self evident - of course not!

We returned home late afternoon and I surprised my Mum with a mountain of Mother's Day presents, much more than she was expecting or knew about, but being a Mum's a difficult job - a job I do not envy. I mean it's hard enough work all on its own but being Mum to a sensitive gay-boy, that just makes it twice as difficult, not that it doesn't have its benefits too - a loving, caring, open hearted son with a keen eye for Women's fashion and a lust for shopping and guys, we share a lot in common and we get on so well as a result. I share a great deal with her, perhaps more than I should, but that's what Mums are for, to tell them everything - even if that includes the fantastic sex life with my baby or the latest sex toys or porn movies we've bought; she hears about it all. Like I said it's a difficult job.............

My baby got home just before six o'clock, seriously spent up but seriously happy - he'd had a great day with his Mum too; and he'd also bought me a present. He bought me some pants, well I say pants but there's hardly anything of them, so to be more specific it was a two pack of Hom strings in the most lightest, softest, silkiest fabric you could ever imagine; and as a result they're just so horny. When I told him there was no need to buy me a gift he said there was - he bought them because he could, because he was thinking of me and because he loves me; he's just the most kindest, thoughtful, loving boyfriend and he almost made me cry again. I asked if his Mum was with him when he bought them - like hang on a minute Mum I'm just buying my boyfriend some sexy, silky string pants; it doesn't happen does it? It does, my baby's Mum was there and he even asked her opinion; hand on heart that's not a joke but then again his Mum is so cool so it shouldn't surprise. Whatever, I thanked my baby for his kind gesture, I thanked him so much it almost threw the plans for Saturday night into disarray..........

The right reasons

2010-03-12T20:17:00.000Z

What a great day boys and girls - today I've had an absolutely faultless day, it's been absolutely perfect; from the moment I got up to right here and right now - a beautiful day! There's a contradiction already, a break from the norm if you like - from the moment I got up; I mean I'm so not a morning person but today, I don't know why, but I was bright eyed and bushy tailed from the start. The alarm woke us and my baby got up first, he headed into the bathroom to do his morning business whilst I lay in bed listening to him and usually I can doze back off or just lay there staring at the ceiling or something; and sometimes my baby has to wake me again when he's finished. This morning there was none of it, whilst my baby was finishing off I got up, headed downstairs to put the kettle on and upon my return upstairs my baby was just drying himself off from the shower. Oh my gosh what a sight, even at that time of day, my baby's body naked and still slightly damp; now I've seen him naked and we've bathed and showered together on so many occasions but still to see him in such a state of undress turns me on so much. I just stood on the landing watching him in silence, my baby noticed me stood there and asked if I was okay? I told him I was better than okay before telling him he was beautiful, he made me so horny and I'd love to take him back to bed - the smile on my baby's face, well he is nothing short of beautiful. I walked into the bathroom and kissed him whilst my hand went South and caressed him, someones got up feeling horny today my baby said before he slapped my bum cheek and kissed me again. I kid you not all I wanted was to get shagged right there in the bathroom and if time had been on our side it would have happened (I was going to say may have happened but my baby has just said it would have without a doubt - damn work!) Suffice to say as we headed off to work we were both happy, smiling and horny; our goodbye kiss lasted for ages and involved more groping and caressing - my baby's parting words were I love you babes, I can't wait to get home tonight; I couldn't have said it better myself!

My workday went the same way as my early morning; it was perfect and I took it upon myself to indulge in a little harmless flirting with a Police Officer - that's right boys and girls my flirting knows no bounds. He was a new recruit assigned to the Town Centre for five weeks which means the next five weeks of my life I'm blessed with eye candy both in and outside of work; that's if my baby lets me go back to work on Monday morning. He says he's going to phone up work and tell them I can't come in for the next five weeks because I may get arrested for lewd conduct if I do. He's only joking boys and girls, he knows as well as I do that I won't do anything other than look and harmlessly flirt; I wouldn't do a thing to jeopardise our relationship, there's no guy that could ever come close to my baby, no one. But the Police Officer was young and cute and I wasn't the only one who thought so because I had to fight off girlfriend and lock her in the office when he walked through - she was literally ripping the door of it's hinges like a woman possessed! And as he was stood talking to me he was toying with his handcuffs - proper cock tease; and I did perhaps make it too obvious that I thought he was hot. Because when I went for a walk later on it was the talk of the Town Centre, what's this you scared off the new Police Officer this morning was one of the comments - no joke! Whatever, I've got the best boyfriend in the World, Mr Police Officer would be out of luck even if he did want to slap the cuffs on me in a sexually suggestive and aggressive manner; besides we've got our own handcuffs.................

If any more proof was needed how much I love my baby, well it came pretty much out of the blue during my lunch break. I was talking with girlfriend over lunch and we got round to talking about my baby - how kind, caring and thoughtful he is. Girlfriend mentioned the ring he bought me for Valentines Day, told me I've got a good boyfriend and it all became too much for me. I was sat staring at the ring on my finger, thinking of the kind words girlfriend had just spoken and how true they were whilst thinking of my baby; and the tears just welled up in my eyes. I couldn't help it, I came over all emotional and I had to wipe away a tear, truth be told for a moment I thought I wouldn't be able to stop the tears once they started. I wouldn't have cared if I'd have been sat opposite girlfriend in a flood of tears because some guys are worth crying over and sometimes those tears are not of sadness. There's one guy in my life who just makes me so happy and as girlfriend said is so kind, caring and thoughtful amongst many other things - he's my boyfriend, I love him to bits, so much that sometimes it makes me cry for all the right reasons xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Like hand in glove?

2010-03-10T20:28:00.000Z

References made within this post may not make sense at this moment in time boys and girls; and for those with an eagle eye you may notice there was no post last night but within a couple of hours one may appear. If it does don't worry, you're not going mad; you see we started a post last night and then we got distracted by our inherent horniness - we are so stupidly horny, you've probably already gathered that much but still it's fantastic to be so horny all the time when we're together. We make each other so hot and as last night it's awesome how a simple kiss can lead to full on sex - that's all that happened, my baby gave me a kiss, I didn't let the kiss go so it became a snog, my hand disappeared down my baby's pants and before you know it my arse was getting shagged rotten. It's just fantastic to have tons of sex and top quality sex at that; we could never tire of sex or get enough of it - it's the best experience two boyfriends could ever have - sex, sex, sex - dirty, horny, hard sex. I love to feel my baby inside of me and my baby loves to feel himself inside of me; it's so good we've not switched for months and we have no plans to either - we are so damn happy.

But still I've got to finish last nights post at some point because you have to know about the three way butt blaster and the anal grenade - I bet you all can't wait now I've whet you're appetites! I can hear the questions going through your mind - what's an anal grenade? Stay tuned boys and girls all may be revealed, that's unless you're under the age of consent in which case what are you doing reading this blog? Stop right now or I'll tell your parents! You may not have to worry anyway because if the choice between a blog entry and sex with my baby rears it's head again, the blog's going to lose out, no question! Anyway I'm sure I mentioned in last nights missing post (you see this is turning difficult already) that I so wanted my baby to try his three way butt blaster on me, if I did (and you ever see the post) it's a lie, a total and utter lie. I don't need it, I've not yet tried it but I know I don't need it because there is no way on this earth that it can be any better than the real thing - better than my baby's cock, it has to be impossible. But if I'm proven wrong and it is better then there'll be no more posts on here because there'll be no more me - I'll be dead. Seriously, I don't think I could take any more pleasure than I get from my baby, I don't even think anything more pleasurable has even been invented and even if it has I don't want any part of it - I'm not joking I think it would kill me. Besides I wouldn't trade my baby for anything in the World - if someone offered me, I don't know, a million pounds to leave my baby and never see or speak to him again I wouldn't take it; hand on heart not a chance. Sure the money would set me up for the rest of my life and I'd probably never have to worry about anything ever again; but what's the point in living a life without love? Love brings happiness and contentment, love has no price - it can't be bought or sold, love can't be found everywhere - sometimes it's a long and lonesome search; I'd take my baby everyday of the week without hesitation. I love him to bits, my beautiful boyfriend xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

So, sex last night - there were no butt blasters, anal grenades or any other sex toys involved; it was just my baby and I, skin against skin, lots of foreplay followed by a long, hard shagging and it was spectacular. My baby worked me into a fever, honestly I was convulsing with pleasure whilst getting laid, absolutely in bits - my baby's mentioned on many occasions that he's never seen a guy get so much pleasure with him, a fact I find hard to believe because he is an orgasm machine; he gives me anal orgasms pretty much on demand and they are the most earth shattering orgasms. He mentioned it again last night after we'd finally recovered and in hindsight it honestly makes us both laugh about it because it does absolutely devastate me, I become delirious with pleasure; whatever it turns my baby on even more to see me in such a state and he's learned not to stop and ask if I'm okay - instead he ploughs away even harder and faster.

So we don't know but we guess maybe we're just made for each other both in and out of the bedroom. Sure sex is not everything in a relationship but it's very important for us at least, we both love lots of it and if it's top drawer quality then it does make us want more and more. Perhaps we're just the perfect fit for each other, say like hand in glove or more pointedly cock in bottom............?

Make love not war

2010-03-09T20:51:00.000Z

Okay before I start I saw two gay-boys holding hands in Stockport today, I guess they were around about 20 years old, both fashion victims and both kind of looked the same. I mean they had the same hairstyle, both looked to be fake tanned up and they were both wearing almost identical clothes and shoes, seriously they were like identikit boyfriends. They were so alike it's a wonder they got on at all; and before you say perhaps they weren't boyfriends - they might have been brothers, I could just tell they were gay; even before they started holding hands I knew they were gay - my gaydar does work occasionally! Not only that but they were both pretty boys, not my cup of tea but still pretty boys and it was like who's the dominant boyfriend in the relationship? They both looked seriously submissive and I know it's incredibly wrong to judge people, after all I don't know them and it's none of my business anyway but still I couldn't help it. My judgemental side was soon put back in its rightful place because a colleague mentioned my relationship with my boyfriend - my baby's the younger, the shorter and the cuter of the two of us; hence many would think, including my colleague if he didn't know better, that I was the dominant boyfriend and my baby was the submissive one. He was right too, if we're out in the gay village and we get talking to whoever the majority of them think the same - me being dominant and my baby being submissive; it's happened so many times and it always make us laugh so much because it's so far from the truth. My baby often makes it worse by saying, my boyfriend the dominant one - I could never imagine him being all macho and aggressive, the next time he goes to the toilet or the bar just watch how he walks! I guess what I'm trying to say is we should never judge a book by its cover because regardless of what my boyfriend looks like I'm just so not dominant, there's very little male testosterone coursing through my veins! Anyway, watching the two gay-boys holding hands as they walked through Stockport made me smile, it was just so sweet, in fact it was beautiful to witness such tenderness between two guys, it was heart warming and it's a sight very rarely seen in Stockport. If nothing else it was a reminder that we are not alone and yes we see it every time we go to the gay village but to see it in everyday life, amongst the streets of Straightville is a good sign, a sign of better days to come for gay-boys and girls everywhere. They reminded me so much of my baby and I because we hold hands, kiss and cuddle pretty much wherever we go; and we both know how that feels inside - it's a beautiful feeling to show your love, so I hope it makes whoever sees us doing the same when were out and about smile.

Onto the main event, on Saturday whilst shopping we bought some new sex toys, or more pointedly we bought each other a new sex toy - it was my baby's idea. You see with our first anniversary as boyfriends imminent and amongst both our birthdays and valentines day we initially decided not to bother buying each other gifts. We'd planned to go out for a meal and party to celebrate and we both thought that was more than enough, that was until we found ourselves in the sex shop. We just went in for a nosey, we had nothing in mind to buy and to be honest we were going to check out the DVD section for any new porn movies. That was when my baby said we should buy each other an alternative anniversary gift, we should choose a sex toy for each other; my initial thought was how disgusting (I've just got shoved for that one because it's such a lie and been told to try again - this time incorporating the truth.) My initial thought was what an awesome idea followed by further thoughts of how lucky how I am to have such a horny, dirty boyfriend and why didn't I think of that idea; without any further hesitation I was diving into the toy section to find something suitable. I bought my baby a three way butt blast (don't they come up with some awesome names for sex toys?) which looks like this.......

It's basically an anal vibrator specifically designed to stimulate the P-spot (the male G-spot which incidentally you'll find up your bum, hence why being submissive in a gay relationship is so earth shattering) the main body of the vibrator is inserted in the recipients bum, the claw underneath stimulates the balls during insertion and the upright claw on top stimulates the spread bum cheeks. I guess that's where the name three way butt blast originates because it stimulates three separate areas at once, there's also a vibrator in the tip and the base for maximum blast off and the base of the main body is ridged for further stimulation. Incidentally why do sex shops charge a fortune for batteries? And why are they so secretive? Because the guy didn't even ask us if we wanted batteries, he just added them to the order and didn't even tell us the price; he didn't tell us because they're a rip off - I declined the offer, I said we've got lots of batteries already because we've got lots of sex toys thank you very much!

I tried it out on my baby last night, I didn't need to ask if it was any good, trust us the butt blast is the correct description. I butt blasted my baby whilst I was giving him head, it was so horny to raise and lower the speed and gently twist and turn it whilst it was inside of him. I don't think I've ever heard him orgasm so wildly before, seriously he was out of his mind with pleasure for at least ten minutes before he eventually shot his load and when he did he almost groaned the house down. It made me so hot, I was stupidly horny just watching him in the throes of sheer ecstasy and there was no chance of him warning me that he was about to cum and I had no choice in the matter of whether I wanted to swallow or not. He exploded and well, he almost shot the back of my throat out he came so powerfully, there was no chance of spitting because it had already disappeared, not that I minded and nor did I complain. It's definitely a toy that I'll be trying myself and one that I want my baby to use whilst we're having sex, with orgasms like that I may drown in my baby's semen, I know I'm gross - sorry!

My baby's choice of sex toy caused some debate whilst in the sex shop, we didn't argue - we rarely do, but we debated. Well it wasn't really a debate to be honest because we were both in fits of laughter, initially I thought my baby was joking but he wasn't and we had each other in bits. My baby was like, I really want to buy this for you and I was like, there's no way on earth that it'll fit inside of me; to which my baby replied I bet it would. I played the antagonist (a polite term for drama queen) by asking if he really thought I was that much of a slut and so loose that I could take it? You've had lots of experience and we've got plenty of lube was his reply, a very polite reply considering; but it was just the look on his face, now I don't know how this works considering we were stood in a sex shop choosing each other a sex toy, but he looked so cute and innocent, and when he gave me a kiss and said please in such a sweet voice what could I do? He bought me an anal grenade............

Which is kind of like the biggest, meanest looking butt plug we've ever seen! Now the thing with butt plugs is the girth of it - that's the be all and all because that's it's job and I hope you can tell from the photo that this has indeed got some serious girth; it's beyond huge. Not only that but it's made from solid rubber and so has no flexibility to it - if it goes in it goes in as is; and it's got deep ridges cut into it so it resembles a grenade, hence the name, and those ridges are going to make the rites of passage (that's a quality statement considering, oh gosh that's funny) stimulating to say the least. To be honest it kind of scared me, enthralled me and made me horny all at the same time; it just made my baby horny he so wanted to work my hole with it. So after I finished butt blasting and blowing my baby last night he proceeded with his attempts to make the grenade fit, I was seriously horny anyway after finishing with my baby and maybe that helped but still at the risk of sounding like a complete whore..................

My baby was right, the anal grenade, by some miracle did indeed fit inside of me! But in my defence it took some time, plenty of lube and a truck load of trust; truth be told it was worth the effort (and I'm going to sound like a complete whore now) and I'm so glad my baby talked me into allowing him to buy it because I've never felt so full in my entire life. I've never taken anything so big in my entire life, but dear me it was so horny, I felt like I was going to explode it stretched me to the limit; and man did it make my baby horny to see me taking it all - I can't even repeat what he said! Going in is one thing but coming out - I now know what it's like to give birth, no joke; OH MY GOSH I thought my bum would never look, feel or work the same again. I didn't need my baby to tell me what it looked like, I mean I could feel what it had done to me without touching it; it was like the awesome post sex feeling after I've just been shagged rotten when I know I've had it long and hard - it's a beautiful feeling; (I'm trying so hard not to overelaborate here boys and girls - and my baby's laughing at my futile efforts but trust me I'm doing well here) this was like the same feeling multiplied infinitely and my baby told me anyway. My baby let me recover some whilst marvelling at the sight and the second time it went in a whole lot easier, thankfully there was no third time.................

Thankfully, the whole experience had gotten my baby so worked up that he recovered from his earlier butt blasting and was ready to go again; thankfully the third time solid rubber was replaced by solid flesh and muscle. I was so gagging it for it and man did I get it!

One

2010-03-08T20:43:00.000Z

So today's the day boys and girls - on the 8th of March 2009 my baby asked me if I'd like to be his boyfriend, one year ago today, dear me I promised myself I wasn't going to cry whilst I did this post but, just give us a minute............... Oh gosh, there I was one sentence in and I was already gone, my baby gave me a cuddle and a kiss, it helped - he always helps. There's many things that get lost in my mind and lost in time, I've got a woefully bad memory but somethings just stick in there and well, when a cute and sexy guy asks you to be his boyfriend that's one of things that has stuck, how could I forget? I'm reminded of it each time I see or talk to my baby, I could never forget; I don't remember exactly what we were doing at the time but I know it was a Sunday evening after we'd spent all weekend together and we were sat together on the sofa. I guess we had a great weekend together, we didn't see each other then as often as we do now, but I know over that weekend we kind of clicked; I mean I always fancied the pants off my baby but I knew in my heart that I was attracted to him for more than just the sex. But back then I was way too shy to come out and say it, to say I think I'm falling in love with you, I don't know but I wasn't as confident back then. Oh gosh my baby's just called it, his memory is much better than mine, we were just sat together talking, talking about relationships and love, what we both wanted from a guy and from life - the highs, the lows and everything in between. And for the first time since we started seeing each other I really opened up, I talked and I talked openly and honestly (yet I still didn't mention the fact that I'd fallen in love with him) which may not sound like a major upheaval, but unless you know me and knew what I was like back then, you'd understand that it was indeed a major upheaval.

Through it all I just remember my baby looking at me so softly, so intently and so caring; that's the thing that struck me most - the look in his eyes, it was beautiful, so warm and tender. We talked some more and then my baby he just said, and I think I've got this bit word perfect, I've had such a great weekend babes and I love spending time with you; I would like to do this more often and I would like to call you my boyfriend. There then followed silence, a long uneasy silence (I didn't mean it to be uneasy but my baby later told me it was) it was like my brain was trying to comprehend what I'd just heard to make sure I heard it correctly. Not only that but it made me kind of speechless, it was like everything I ever wanted to hear had just been spoken, my baby had said what I'd been wanting to say but was too afraid and yet as much as I wanted to scream at the top of my voice YES I'D LOVE TO BE YOUR BOYFRIEND, nothing would come out. Instead I took his hand in mine, I kissed him softly and I eventually managed to tell him he'd just made me the happiest boyfriend in the World, with the emphasis very much on boyfriend. He asked me if I was sure and I just cried for nothing more than the fact that it proved how selfless and caring he was; I mean he wanted to make sure I'd not just said it under the pressure of it all or on the spur of the moment - it proved beyond any shadow of doubt what I already knew, he was a very special guy - caring, kind and loving; and I had fallen for him big time.

I've been free falling ever since - falling under my baby's spell whenever we're together; I adore him, I love him and I lust for him. When I'm with my baby I'm lost - lost in a World of happiness, comfort, care and love; I don't ever want to be found, happy anniversary you still make me the happiest boyfriend in the World. I love you to bits xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

A lot of things...........

2010-03-07T23:07:00.000Z

.......... make me horny, but first off...........

What a stunningly gorgeous day boys and girls, absolutely faultless - not only my baby and I but also the weather, wall to wall blue skies, not a cloud to be seen and it allowed the sunshine to burn so brightly down onto us. It was beautifully warm in the sunshine too and we didn't need to hold each other close to keep warm but we held each other close regardless, because we love each other. In fact I absolutely adore my baby, days like these remind me of him so much - he's the most beautiful boyfriend in the whole wide World; yes, that's true babes, you're far too modest for your own good sometimes but trust me it's true - you're the most beautiful guy inside, outside, in bed and out of it, fully clothed, naked and everything in between. You get the idea boys and girls don't you? I love me baby to bits; and I forgot to mention he's at his most beautiful when he's just in his pants and nothing else, in my eyes that's better than naked. Honestly, he's got the most gorgeous body and when his modesty is covered, as it was this morning, in a pair of tight, short cut pants well, there is no better sight. How he fills them, dear me, that's the thing that gets me, his bits and pieces so well defined in the front of his pants - like you can't see them but you can trace the outline with your eye or if you're lucky like me, with your hand. The material cupping and supporting against his bulge, promises of things to come and it honestly strikes me cold when I think on it - all that and it's all mine, it's beyond bizarre why any guy would want to pass that by, pass my baby by, but they have - I don't even begin to understand that. Not that I complain, far from it because it means we're at where we're at now - me, my baby, boyfriends xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox. My baby's just said it's because he was waiting for a guy like me to come along, no one else would do and it was worth the wait; bless you babes, I told you, you're nothing but beautiful xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

We went to Brabyns Park today, it was more out of convenience than anything else because we we didn't get up until late, well we woke up kind of early but by the time we got out of bed it was late (correction, my baby says it was me that woke up kind of early and I woke him up by being unable to control my hands! That perhaps is more like the truth but the burning question is - is that a complaint? Seeming as though you rose to the occasion quite rapidly and thereon in took control of the situation is it? It's not a complaint boys and girls, my baby's laughing and asking me to stop fooling with him when I already know the answer.) plus my baby needed to head back to his flat to pick up his work gear for tomorrow and drop some other stuff off; and as it's kind of on the way it was a no-brainer. It was just nice to be out and about in the fresh air and the sunshine; that's why we love heading out for a walk on a Sunday particularly so if we've been out on the Saturday night. It helps to clear our heads and bodies, it's like the antidote to all the excessiveness we subjected ourselves to - a balance if you like; I guess it also eases us out of the weekend and back into another working week, we just find it very relaxing. Which it is, strolling around together hand in hand without a care in the World, no clock watching, nothing - it's time for us and nobody else, just my baby and me. The weather is merely a bonus but it does make you feel so alive, it puts an extra spring in your step and a hint of mischievousness in your mind. We were walking around holding each other close when I tried to trip my baby up, I was just messing around, I didn't mean him any harm - I stuck my leg in front of his as we were walking along and sure enough he tripped and stumbled but he didn't fall completely. It was so funny though, I was in absolute bits, pretty much on my knees with laughter; that was until my baby regained his balance, turned around and with a devilish grin on his face declared that I was going to get it. He started running towards me so I turned on my heels and started to run away from him; I was doing a strange mixture of giggling and screaming like a demented schoolgirl or something all the while I could hear my baby closing me down until...............

He caught me, my baby tripped me up from behind and I fell to the ground, I just had time to turn over onto my back to witness my baby jump on top of me; he pinned me down and started tickling me whilst asking me if I thought it was still funny. I couldn't answer him because I couldn't speak it was like torture; all I could do was scream breathlessly until my baby stopped and replaced the tickles with kisses. He was laughing, saying not only do I scream like a big girl but I run like one too; he said I'm so gay but it's okay because he also said that's why he loves me so. He helped me up off the ground and dusted me down, paying particular attention to my bum - it must have been very dirty (I knew that was a bad choice of words as soon as it hit the page - my baby says I've got a very dirty bum, dirty in a good way) before we carried on walking. It set us up for the day, we have such fun and laugh so much when we're together; and the best bit about it is that it's often real childish, innocent fun - the kind of fun that makes you forget about everything except the moment at hand.

Before we went out I did some washing, it was mostly my baby's stuff, he came straight back from Devon to my house and so had a weeks worth of clothes to wash - it would have been so unfair to leave it for him to do and I wouldn't have allowed it anyway. In fact it was a pleasure, as much as I love being looked after by my baby I love to look after him too, besides it was a beautiful day and I didn't really have a great deal of my own stuff to wash. I was hanging his pants out to dry when a thought hit me straight out of the blue; I became kind of horny whilst handling his pants, seriously; and although it's nothing new for my baby's pants to make me horny it's usually whilst he's in them! This time, I don't know, it was just the feel of his pants in my hand - the material, the short cut style, knowing they'd been so close to his intimate parts and I could picture him in my mind wearing each pair as I went through them; it really did turn me on. It's hard to explain, I really don't know, I mean I've washed and handled his pants lots of times but this time it really did strike me; maybe it's because we've been apart I really don't know but his pants really do float my boat.

When we got home late afternoon my baby's washing was dry and the bedroom was calling; I needed to get horny with him and strip my baby down to nothing but his pants. I wasn't the only one who was horny, my baby was possessed or something because he was so dirty and dear me did it turn me on. I'm not going to go into any great detail boys and girls suffice to say that whilst he was shagging me the dirty talk coming from his mouth drove me straight over the edge. It was way dirtier than normal, like I said he was like a man possessed and it made me feel so submissive, cheap and dirty that it was a thrill all on its own; telling me what he was going to do to me, asking me how it felt and making me beg for more - it blew my mind to bits, it blew both our minds to bits. My baby seemed to work himself up to fever pitch too and after we both orgasmed we just lay there kissing and cuddling, neither of us could move, talk or do anything else.

My baby's just called it actually and called it so true, it's so good that I couldn't have said it better myself. We enjoy lots of sex and some may think it's only the sex that makes the relationship work but in reality it's the opposite that's true - it's the quality of our relationship that makes our sex life work. That's such a beautiful statement, I wouldn't even try to better that one, so I won't. Instead we'll wish you all a safe and peaceful night blogger friends, goodnight xxxxxxxxxx.

W.A.D

2010-03-07T11:37:00.000Z

Top of the morning boys and girls, what a glorious day - we woke up with blurry minds to be greeted by sunshine and blue skies; there's no better way to start the day than to wake up with sunshine pouring into the bedroom and a cute and sexy boyfriend next to me in bed. Good weather makes us so horny too, well it did this morning anyway - I woke up so wanting to get laid, seriously gagging for a good shagging (oh gosh that rhymes) that I couldn't keep my hands off my baby's W.A.D (weapon of ass destruction.) That's quality, oh gosh so funny, my baby's laughing his little cotton pants off, well they're not cotton - he's wearing a pair of white HOM low rise hipsters, they're made from polyamide but they are little; oh my gosh they're cut so short and as a result they accentuate his physique so well. It's a glorious sight, I kid you not, he's a bona-fide sex god, he just oozes sex and I cannot keep my eyes and my hands off his pants, so much so that I've forgotten what his face looks like; instead of maintaining eye contact I'm maintaining cock contact - my baby makes me stupidly horny. He makes me feel so feminine too..............

These are the pants my baby bought me as part of Valentines gift, they're the most wonderful pants I've ever owned. And they do make me feel so feminine and so submissive, it's the first time I've worn them but they do alter my mood, honestly. I just feel so girly wearing them, whether it's because of the pink colour or the smooth, shiny, silky material; or the combination of both but whatever they're the most feminine guys pants I've ever seen - that's why my baby bought them for me, as I've always said my baby loves my feminine side and they just accentuate this fact. They're awesome to wear, they feel so smooth and tactile, and they fit like a dream - just beautiful pants. They make my baby horny too, perhaps I should have put some more clothes on, then again maybe not!

Last night was great, we went to Genghis Khans near the gay village for a meal, it's the first time I've ever been there, it was my baby's idea, he's been there before, before we started going out together. What a top restaurant, you kind of help yourself - pick your own meats, vegetables, accompaniments and sauces before you hand it over to the chef who cooks it all for you. As fresh as you like, as tasty as you like and as much as you like; you can go back again and again, make up different dishes and eat to your hearts content. I needed my baby's help, without him I wouldn't have had a clue what to do to be honest, he guided me through the process of not only what to do but what went well together. The best I tried was chicken satay, which was like chicken cooked in a peanut butter sauce, just stupidly tasty but what a laugh we had mixing and matching our dishes then trying out each others results. For the £20 each it cost us for the feast option, which is basically a free for all of everything on offer we certainly got our moneys worth; we were both so full afterwards. It was a great way to start a Saturday night, the restaurant was packed, the atmosphere was alive and the smell of the food being constantly cooked was awesome.

Afterwards we walked round the corner into the gay village and partied the night away; drinking, laughing, dancing, smooching, kissing and cuddling. Gosh we were just so touchy feely all night long - there was a cheese fest going on in Spirit and we literally did get into the spirit of it, smooching along to never say goodbye. We held each other so close on the dance floor, my baby's hands slid down the back of my jeans as he pulled me onto his body and held me there; it was just so romantic, so cheesy and so gay but above all it was beautiful - I felt so loved and truth be told a little bit horny after having my bum felt up whilst getting up close and personal with my baby. It continued outside the club, I ended up pushed against the side wall as we snogged but this time it was me pulling my baby into my body - I wished we'd found a quieter spot, instead we had to wait until we got home and home feels a long way off when you're feeling horny..............

Go easy

2010-03-06T19:26:00.000Z

Shopping was a by product today, it didn't even really matter, all that mattered was that fact that we were together, we had time to enjoy the day and there was no one or nothing to get in the way of it. It's been a long time, this is my first weekend off - my first days off in four weeks and along with the fact that my baby's been away all week it was a welcome relief, it was bliss. It all came together today, we both absolutely adore spending time with each other, being out and about, and spending time in Manchester, where we both feel so comfortable and able to show our love for each other - we really love Manchester and its people for embracing a couple of gay-boys in love.

It's rare we get any negative comments or remarks, people just accept us for who we are or don't even notice us, it means so much. We don't even think about it anymore, it's second nature to hold each others hand whilst we're out and we wouldn't have it any other way; there's nothing better than spending the day with the guy I love walking round hand in hand, checking out the sights, the sounds and the shops of Manchester - it's dreamlike, honestly it is that good and means that much. Today, my baby spent most of the time cuddling my bum as we walked along, it's such a wonderful feeling to feel his hand caressing my bum. It just makes me feel so safe and secure, like my baby's protecting me from any harm, he's guiding me and he's telling the World this is my boyfriend keep your hands off. My baby's just said that's exactly why he does it, when we're walking around it's nothing sexual, he's just protecting and showing his love for me - bless you babes, that's beautiful - you know how much it means xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox. I belong to my boyfriend, there's no one else I need, there's no one else that compares - all the love, care and affection I'll ever need I find in him; it's the most beautiful feeling inside to know the times we spend together are always the best. The love, the laughter, the kisses and cuddles; and the look in my baby's eyes and the smile upon his face whenever I look at him - it tells its own story. He's the most beautiful boyfriend in every single way possible - his smile fills my heart with a love so pure each time I see it, hand on heart that is nothing but the absolute truth. Hand on heart, I've just received lots of kisses, cuddles and kind loving words for that too, it wasn't my intention, it was only the truth but I do not complain - you can never have enough kisses and cuddles nor hear enough kind and loving words, never...............

Anyway we're off out for a meal tonight and a few drinks because, well, it's near as damn it our first anniversary - one year together as boyfriends, oh my gosh. We don't know where the time has gone, but it's been filled for the most part with happy times - with love, laughter, kisses and cuddles shared; I guess when you're having such fun time does fly by so fast and above everything else we know we're very fortunate. I've never had a relationship last so long, you can take that as you like, but the honest truth is I've never found a boyfriend with whom I've felt as comfortable and happy with. My baby, he's had one long term relationship within the mix but he was never that happy - it was a boyfriend for boyfriends sake; he's much happier with where he's at now and that my friends makes two of us. Life isn't easy, there's too many variables beyond our control, variables that come crashing down when you least expect it; but they're more manageable when you don't have to face them alone. Maybe that's the secret - love, comfort and support makes life easier, it makes it easier to smile and easier to laugh. Go easy boys and girls - go easy.....................

I cry

2010-03-06T10:58:00.001Z

And I cry for all the right reasons......

Yesterday was so hard, it was a seriously difficult day to get through and I struggled, I struggled so bad - I was almost in tears at one point; I was walking around work clutching a photo of my baby in my hand - no joke. The day just seemed to drag and the nearer I got to going home and seeing my baby the more I realised I missed him - it was horrible; I don't think I've ever missed somebody so much in my life, it broke me in two yesterday. Hence, I was so glad when home time eventually came around, I literally ran from the office and headed straight to Sainsburys to stock up for the weekend before racing on home, well as racing as I get when I'm carrying carrier bags full of shopping! I turned into my street and my baby's car was parked outside, it honestly took my breath away and I had to stop and stand still for a second or two. A complete and utter feeling of relief rushed over me and as I walked down the street and closer to home the tears began to well up in my eyes. By the time I reached the front door the tears were streaming down my cheeks..................

I opened the door and didn't even have time to shut it behind me; one cute and sexy boyfriend with the biggest smile in the World said he'd missed me so much, I dropped my bags on the floor and, well I couldn't have not cried for a million pounds - the tears flooded from my eyes. So much so that I couldn't even speak, we hugged, we kissed and my baby helped to dry my tears - and the thing I remember the most, the thing that struck me quite vividly even through my watery eyes, was my baby's beautiful smile. My world lit up again with his smile, it had been rather grey and dull without it but back in his arms I felt so alive both inside and out - the world had come back to life. We hugged and kissed for, well we don't know how long, but it was a long time whilst my baby tried his best to make my tears run dry; but each time he said he missed me or he loved me I started all over again - I missed being loved and I missed loving my baby. I love kisses and cuddles so much, more than words could ever do justice to, they have the power to heal my heart, soul and spirit - with my baby's kisses and cuddles I know everything is going to be okay; and it is and it was............

The holiday has done my baby good, he's never looked so alive and so healthy - seriously; I didn't think he could ever look more gorgeous but he does, being out and about in the glorious Spring weather day on day has left its mark. Not only that but he's so relaxed, more than ever, not that he ever really gets stressed (that's my job in our relationship) he just takes everything in his stride and doesn't let things get on top of him; but still I can just tell he's so happy and carefree inside - it's heartening, very much so, as I said if my baby's happy then I'm happy - we're both stupidly happy. We spent the night cuddled up, drinking a few beers and a few Brandy's whilst my baby recounted the stories of his holiday and showing me the photos. He's had a whale of a time boys and girls, an absolute jaunt and it all comes through in the stories he tells of it - the excitement and laughter in his voice, it was stunningly beautiful to just sit there, to watch and to listen to him; I've never been to Devon but last night I was transported there, perhaps one day we'll get to go together - I have an invite, well two actually - one from my baby and one from his sister. Family means a great deal to my baby, it's a good trait to have, there are some who don't get on with their families for whatever reason, but if you can you should, my baby does and it shows, regardless of the miles he loves his sister - for a while the miles closed in on them, the memories remain so vibrant............

We really would love to tell you that sex was anything but earth shattering because that would prove that we're only human; and even though we are human we cannot lie - sex was beyond description (although it won't stop me from trying to describe it!) I'm only joking boys and girls, suffice to say that five days apart left us both with so much pent up sexual tension and to feel my baby inside me again after so long beggars any kind of belief. He kept me on the boil for so long last night, it was so tender and so loving, I was in a state of orgasm for so long, my whole body was shaking it was so racked with pleasure - lord knows what the neighbours think of us because I was far from quiet, there was no way on earth that I could keep such pleasure quiet, it's impossible. I was lay gazing up into my baby's eyes as he moved inside of me, totally and utterly powerless, totally and utterly lost - our sex life is the best we've ever had and the best we've ever known.

And to wake up this morning with my beautiful baby lay beside me in bed was a thrill all on its own - the bed felt so empty this week, I had way too much room; so to sleep so close and to feel so safe and so warm next to my baby's body, and to wake up to a kiss, a cuddle and a horny boyfriend - it's the only way to start the day. My baby cooked breakfast this morning, he said he wanted to, he said he missed cooking for me and looking after me - it was beautiful, not only food wise but to just sit around the kitchen table, drinking coffee, talking and planning the day together, whilst we slowly woke up, it's been way too long. We're going into Manchester today, the sun may not be shining but at least it's dry, the sun doesn't need to shine anyway - my baby's the only sunshine I need in my life, when I'm with him there's always light and warmth in my World. Have a great day blogger friends, spent it with someone you love and never, ever take such times for granted because they're special and should be cherished. With love xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

Defenceless

2010-03-04T22:17:00.001Z

What another glorious day weather wise boys and girls, it's been absolutely gorgeous and it really has thrilled me again to know my baby's picked such a good week to go on holiday, it honestly means so much. I was walking about in the sunshine today whilst looking up at the bluest of blue skies and well all I could think of was my baby, if there's anyone within this World that deserves to be blessed with such wonderful weather it's him. It makes all the difference too and my baby has taken full advantage of it - he's been out and about every single day with his Sister, it sounds like they've been all over Devon and back again; and they've just had such great fun together, it's heartening to listen to my baby recounting the fun they've had each day and I can just tell in his voice that he's so happy, it fills my heart with a loving warmth. He said if I'd have been with him it would have made it all even better.................

He made me cry when he told me that, I couldn't help it, I so didn't want to cry, I wanted to be strong but I'm not that strong; I've no idea why I felt like I wanted to be strong either because my baby knows me - he knows I get emotional and cry; I'm not strong at all. He reminded me that's one of the reasons he loves me - he loves my fragile, affectionate side because he loves to take care of me, he's missed giving me kisses and cuddles; that didn't help either, it made me cry some more. I've missed his kisses and cuddles too, I've missed them so much - I know of no other place where I feel so safe and comfortable than wrapped up in my baby's arms. I needed to cry anyway, my defences have been so high this week in an attempt to protect myself from any harm that I've become very distant and very irritable with those around me. It's affected me, I don't like being like that, it's not my normal self but if nothing else it's seen me through - there's only one day left and I know I'll get through tomorrow; even if I have to crawl through the day, I will get through it.

I just need to feel gay again, to let my natural self shine through, to not feel threatened and to allow my feminine side to reign free again. I don't know but I've never felt so straight since coming out and it's got nothing to do with the lack of sex, it's just in my persona; I guess with my defences high and all I've not felt comfortable to just be me, the fear of getting hurt has been too high. I want to be defenceless, I love my true self, my baby loves the true me and I've missed them both - I don't like hiding behind a false facade, it's way too restrictive. But that's enough of my moaning, I've made it through unscathed and I'm still smiling; but most importantly tomorrow night will be such a relief in every way imaginable, I cannot wait to see my baby again. I know it will make the time we've been apart seem worth it because it's made me realise more than ever just how much I love and treasure my baby; and there's nothing wrong with that, in fact it's the most bittersweet feeling. I've so much love and affection inside just waiting to be let loose and set free, I just want to shower my baby in hugs and kisses, I just want to be back in his arms again.............

Morning sickness

2010-03-03T23:02:00.003Z

Good morning? I don't think so! Gosh, how I'm not a morning person - even when I start work late I'm so not a morning person because I've still just kind of got up, I need time and space to slide into the day. My baby and I have just been in fits of laughter over this, he phoned up as promised and we spent way too long talking and laughing - more over his adventures in Devon, he's having such a wonderful time and it's great to hear him so happy and full of life; moreover it was great just to hear his voice, he's such a comfort. We spent nigh on one and a half hours on the phone, I've never spoken so long on the phone in my life but the time just flew by so fast and before we knew it we were saying our goodbyes in whispers and small talk, which in themselves went on for at least ten minutes. It was beautiful, it was so twee and innocent - it made me feel so young, like a love crazy teenager - you know when you don't really want to hang up and you just want to keep up with the small talk? And you're urging each other to put the phone down first? I know it's so gay, but I don't care and my baby doesn't care - we embrace such moments with both hands, it makes us both so happy and nothing else matters.

I spoke to my baby's Sister too, it wasn't my idea in fact I really had no choice in the matter nor time to think - my baby said there's someone here who wants to speak to you and there she was on the phone; I didn't even have time to become apprehensive over it. I needn't have worried anyway, she said she was going to tell me to look after her baby brother and treat him right but after reading the post on my blog last night she had no worries in that respect. I could have cried, not for myself but I just found it so overwhelming - referring to my boyfriend as her baby brother and the obvious care, love and protection she affords him; it was just a fleeting moment of pureness. And to know she trusts me, even without meeting me, she trusts me to love and take care of her baby brother as she herself does, well it means a great deal - it means more than words can convey. She asked me to accompany my baby the next time he visits her, I've never been to Devon but my baby says I'll adore the place and it does sound so beautiful - the kindness of people really does blow me away........

Then it hit me - oh my gosh my baby's shown his sister my blog, the post last night was child friendly admittedly but some of it, she couldn't have seen it, she wouldn't speak to me again if she had! I mean the majority of it just relates to how good a shag her baby brother is, which is nothing to be ashamed of, I'm sure she'd be happy and proud of him for being such, but still she doesn't really need to know that or know that it's spread across the internet for all and sundry to read too. Luckily my baby only showed her the most recent posts but he did admit to me that he checked the posts first to make sure they were safe to show to his sister - I was telling him to remember to delete the history on her computer otherwise her evaluation of me and perhaps him might be shattered forever. My baby had me in fits of laugher with his reply, he said, it's okay babes my sister knows we have sex together, it's only natural for boyfriends to have sex, I don't think it'll come as that big of a shock to her. I heard his sister shouting in the background, you two are having sex, give me back that phone, I need to have words with that boyfriend of yours; thankfully it was followed by much laughter, laughter from all of us......

Today may have started off on a bad note but it's ended in love, kindness and laughter; always keep those you love close to your heart boys and girls because those are the only people in this world that truly matter, they make a difference, a difference for the better. Goodnight baby, sleep well and dream lots; I love you to bits xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Look back

2010-03-02T23:02:00.000Z

It's been another mighty fine day weather wise hasn't it boys and girls? It's glorious to see blue skies and sunshine it really does lift the spirits, it puts a spring in your step and makes you feel so alive - I hope it's a sign of things to come. I was stood outside in the sunshine basking in its warmth and it really was quite beautiful to feel its warmth penetrating the body, after all it's the only thing that will be penetrating my body this week! (Sorry, I honestly wasn't teeing that one up it just popped into my head after I wrote it - talking of which it's the only that'll be popping into my head this week too! But it's true, there's no sex for me on the agenda, no boyfriend equals no sex.) It really did like an early Spring day, which it is, but still after a long cold Winter, and a Winter that probably isn't over yet, it was a welcome respite. My baby sure knows when to take a holiday - he picks a week that has so far seen such Spring weather and if the forecast is correct the rest of the week is looking good too. I'm so happy for him, I hope the weather stays like this for him, such weather reminds me of him anyway - he's the sunshine in so many peoples lives, mine included...........

So far it's been so good, I'm coping without my baby, it's not exactly pleasant but it's okay, in fact it's strange. It's all mind games, I mean we've spent days and nights apart on many occasions in the past but on most of those occasions he's only a a short drive away and despite being apart the thought that he's so close is a major comfort. This time it shouldn't be any different and in reality it's not - it's exactly the same principle, we find ourselves apart; all that's changed is the distance. But because I know he's many miles and many hours away from me, well it just plays on mind some, like I said mind games. I'm not complaining and it's not upsetting me, I'm just trying to explain it; I think I'm coping really well without my baby, I think he'll be very proud of me. It's not the only thing that's been on my mind..........

When I've got time on my hands or time to kill, as I've had the past couple of nights, my mind tends to drift and ponder; I've been evaluating our relationship, reflecting on it - how far we've come together and how perceptions have changed as a result. I'm very fortunate, (and I know my baby dislikes me talking about our relationship from my point of view only, like it's all one way traffic, but as he's not here I think this time I'm entitled to) I wasn't looking for love or looking for a boyfriend when we first met, it was pretty much the last thing on my mind. To be honest I'd kind of given up on the idea because I know I'm an emotional kind of guy - I need lots of love and affection, I'm easily hurt, I cry a lot, I can be moody and if left to dwell on my own I can become distant. It's spoilt many a blossoming relationship with guys and I'm not saying it's my fault, I'm not saying it's anyones fault but I guess I can be difficult or too emotionally demanding for some guys to have a relationship with. You know when you first meet a guy and you go out on a date or two - it's all new and exciting like an adventure; and you're on your best behaviour - it's like a facade in some respects because the real person beneath has yet to shine through. If it starts working out and you become more comfortable with each other and you spend more time together, well you let your guard down some and let your true self come through. Then the incompatibilities prevail, either I felt I wasn't getting enough affection and became unhappy and distant or guys didn't want the emotional traits I possess and so didn't like the real me. It's life isn't it? It's not a blame game or anything, people no matter of their sex or sexuality want to be loved for the person they are; and if the person they find themselves with is incompatible, well the relationship breaks down. Thankfully for me it happened in most instances sooner rather than later, the scars weren't as deep and healed quicker. But still you carry those scars with you and it does effect you; there was one guy I absolutely adored in secondary school, I fancied the pants off him it was such a major crush. I'd flirt with him and he'd flirt back without actually doing anything or coming out and saying I'm gay and I've got the hots for you. He led me on and I followed and he humiliated me, he was straight and along with his mates he thought it would be funny to show me up as a faggot. I've never told that story to anyone but my baby, you never lose the scars................

So to find a boyfriend that loves me for who I am, who's willing to sit by my side on the emotional roller coaster, who forgives me when I get lost and don't speak or won't answer his phone calls. Who helps dry my tears and makes me smile again; who gives me kisses, cuddles and holds my hand at every opportunity. My baby saw through everything I'm not and nurtured the innocence hidden within my soul; there's a child inside all of us - it's just that sometimes they're too scared to come out and play for fear of getting hurt again. I don't know the magic secret to love - it's not through going out and actively seeking a boyfriend anyway; I guess things sometimes happen because they're meant to. You look away for a second and when you look back the scars have faded...........

Journeys

2010-03-01T21:52:00.003Z

My baby and I are apart this week, until Friday anyway, he had some holidays to take before the end of financial year, so he's taken them. He's gone to Devon to see his older sister, he doesn't see her that often - it's a tale of the modern world isn't it? We all find ourselves too busy working, trying to eek out a living and have some fun along the way; and sometimes that leaves us far afield from the people we love. But everyone has to follow their dreams, life would not be worth living if we didn't follow our dreams; regardless of this those we love are always in our hearts, no matter how many miles separate, they're permanently etched within our hearts. It's a tale of many friends and family within my and my baby's life; and it's a tale of where my baby's at right now - many miles separate us but he's there within my heart, I cannot help but think of him, I cannot stop loving him..............

He travelled down today, I left my baby in bed as I got up for work and by the time I was ready to leave he was up to say goodbye. I'm not going to pretend that it was nice because it wasn't, I despise goodbyes and I despise goodbyes even more when they encompass my baby and mean we'll be spending some time apart; but it's only five days, it will soon pass. I should be used to it by now, it's not the first time life has seen us apart for a length of time and I've got much better at dealing with it, but still, it wasn't easy. That said I took the chance during our kisses, cuddles and goodbyes to have a final fondle of my baby - he just looked so sexy in a pair of hipsters and nothing else, I was unable to resist, my hands instinctively drifted South - gosh he fills his pants so well and it feels so good. I may have been downhearted but I still had the mind to grab a handful to remember him by until we're back together again - old habits die hard I guess!

I got a text from my baby mid afternoon to say he'd arrived safely and I've spoken to him tonight, it was just so good to hear his voice, to hear him so happy and to know he's spending some quality time with his Sister; and despite the fact that I miss him it doesn't make me sad because I know my baby's happy and that's all I want - to know my baby's happy. We made some promises too - my baby's going to phone me every night at around 9 o'clock, I've got to phone him if there's anything that upsets me and I'm not to post anything negative on here whilst we're apart. It's a fair deal, my baby's going to check in on my blog whilst he's away and he doesn't want to make our time apart any worse by reading any bad thoughts I have on here because such posts upset him (and I typed that without crying babes - honestly!) Like I said, I only ever want to know my baby's happy, so it's a promise, there'll be no negative posts - hopefully there'll be no need anyway because hopefully I'll be fine. Besides there's something to look forward to, when my baby gets back we'll be spending all weekend together - if that's not an incentive then I don't know what is!

Have a great holiday my beautiful boyfriend, be safe, have fun and enjoy every second of it - I know how much it means to you and you know how much you mean to me. Always in my thoughts and always in my heart, I love you to bits xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Safe

2010-02-28T21:34:00.000Z

We had a great night last night boys and girls, in fact it was better than great, Tom blew us both away, seriously. As I said it's the first time either of us have seen him live, I love him and my baby well he just appreciated the music without going overboard about him. But all that has changed, my baby is now a converted bona fide fan and he thanked me so much last night - I got lots of kisses and cuddles, even more than normal and I'm officially the best boyfriend in the World. To say that makes me feel on top of the World is an understatement, all I ever want is to make my baby as happy as he makes me, I think I've achieved that. It was wondrous, to know my baby loved the gig as much as I did; I mean he just came along because I wanted to go, he'd never heard of Tom before we met but to just see him enjoying himself so much and to see him lost in the music and the moment, it filled my heart with love. I guess it made it all the more special for the both of us because it was such a surprise, I didn't expect my baby to truly enjoy it and truth be told he didn't either; but he went with an open mind and got it blown away.

It hindsight it shouldn't have been a surprise because it was an awe inspiring gig, we've never seen or felt so much love, pain, hope and grief through music before - his albums are one thing but the live performance is just something else completely. It was like watching a movie, the full range of human emotions worn on the sleeve for all to see; and you couldn't help but be transfixed by the performance. I kid you not it left us breathless, we were stood holding hands in complete silence and stillness, lost within the music and the lyrics of a little known guy called Tom McRae. There were times when it literally reduced me to tears, honestly, I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes and I had to grasp my baby's hand real hard to help me through - my baby gave me a hug and a kiss at various stages and asked if I was okay. I guess the live performance of the songs I know so well just touched a nerve, they're full of emotion and rawness anyway, but live the songs just wrap you up in their melancholy and world weariness and tear your heart to shreds. Not that they're real sad songs or even depressing but they just reflect the World we live in and even in the darkest of songs there always shines a glimmer of hope; the thing is you can relate to the stories being told within the songs, that's the key and that's what I and now my baby can identify with. It's not radio friendly pop music for the masses but it is genuine, heartfelt and utterly spellbinding.

And it was just great to spend a night out with my baby, it's been a long time coming, how I've missed walking hand in hand with my baby through the streets, spending time together out and about, having a drink, a laugh, a kiss and a cuddle. We would have enjoyed the night anyway regardless of how good the gig was, in the end it was the icing on the cake; because that's what means the most to me - it's being able to go out and hold my baby's hand wherever we go and show the World that this is my boyfriend, he makes me so proud and I love him to bits. I told my baby that last night whilst we were walking home from the bus stop, despite it being so twee and kind of slushy I couldn't keep the thoughts to myself. Besides my baby encourages me to tell him everything so I do, we were walking along side by side and I just kind of let it slip out when I told him. My baby pulled my hand back to stop me and turned to face me before asking me to repeat what I'd just said - it made him smile so much, he told me I'm beautiful and he kissed me; I just remember the look in his eyes - so soft, so inviting, so in love, man he's got the most beautiful eyes...........

This is perhaps my favourite Tom McRae song and certainly the best performance of it I've seen, complete with a full orchestra - it just suits the song so much. I've been singing it all day today whilst thinking of my baby; there's a particular lyric that just makes me think of him. It goes, I'm safe inside a better World of hope and memory; I'm always safe inside a better World when I'm with my baby - with him there is always hope and together we make such beautiful memories. Deal the cards and hope that I can play the same hand next time................

I love you boyfriend xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

We only disappear

2010-02-27T18:08:00.000Z

Not off the radar completely boys and girls, no we're not leaving you or anything like that, well not completely, it'll be just for tonight. And we've not really done that have we? Because, this is a post isn't it? So we've not left you at all, oh gosh what have we started? We will be leaving you shortly though, you'll have to go the rest of the night without us, I hope you all cope with this devastating news? If you're crying already give us a break, we've not been out together properly in weeks, my baby and I need to have a night out occasionally, we're boyfriends for goodness sake, we have to show the World that we love each other and more importantly that gay love is acceptable and the way forward. What do you think babes, you and me as gay ambassadors for Stockport? My baby's just said we could go partying with the Mayor, we could take him to a hip-hop club, he'd go down a storm with the major bling going on around his neck. We could be the same sex couple of Stockport 2010 - ladies and gentlemen Mr & Mr Stockport 2010, oh gosh could you imagine the fame? And the insults, and the prejudice, and the homophobia and the hatred - Stockport the gay capital of the World! It's not that bad actually boys and girls, I guess it's no worse than any other town or city - there's people who accept love in all its guises and people who don't; it's a shame the people who don't use bigoted hatred or violence to communicate. That's the World we live in, it's a travesty...............

But we're heading way off track here and this was only meant to be a quickie (oh matron....) because time is against us (the oh matron has really hit home with my baby, oh gosh such a simple and obvious comment but still, his laughing makes me laugh - he's so adorable when he laughs. Bless you babes, I've missed you today and I love you to bits xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo.) His kisses are adorable too, trust me I've just been adorned with them, lots of kisses, do I get a kiss each time I say I love you? You don't need to know the reply boys and girls, but oh gosh it was just so sweet, my baby makes my heart aquiver, seriously he is the most beautiful guy in the World - we're so stupidly in love, just the best feeling to fall in love, so helplessly.

Tonight we're heading out, back to the Academy in Manchester - it's one of our regular haunts these days, to see Tom McRae; one of my musical heroes who's so criminally underrated it's untrue. He's one of my blogger heroes too, his blog is just so funny, it's a top read, you should check it out. But tonight it's all about the music, it's the first time I'll get to see him live, it's the first for my baby too - until we became boyfriends my baby had no idea who he was; since then he's grown to appreciate him, I wouldn't say love but he's looking forward to it all the same. That said we shouldn't really be going to the gig at all, we bought the tickets way back last year, seriously - I think it was around about July because the gig was scheduled for September. Then I went and booked a holiday during the week of the gig - sometimes I don't think too clearly and I was gutted. I told my baby to take both tickets and take a friend to the gig but he wasn't up for it, he told me that if I wasn't going with him then there was no point in going at all - it's strange how somethings remain wedged in your mind. I can still clearly recall that conversation like it was yesterday, I guess because my baby's words just hit me right in the heart, they struck me down with their beauty despite their being no apparent beauty - it was just a statement of fact but it was just beautiful, it reaffirmed our love. Oh gosh I'm rambling to some tune here, we're heading off at all angles, I'm sorry, it's just because I'm so excited about the gig that's all, my mind's in overdrive but at least I've not mentioned sex yet!

So we thought about selling the tickets but at £12 each it was hardly worth the effort, so we just put it down to experience and carried on shagging our innocence away. (I'm sorry, I did that purposely to mention sex in the post; we probably did anyway - I'm sorry I've wasted £24 of our hard earned money boyfriend is there anyway I can make it up to you? I'll take it out of your bottom thank you very much! The interest rates must be very high boys and girls because I'm still paying him back - HAPPY DAYS! It didn't go like that at all, it's a joke okay? I don't charge my baby and we don't need any kind of excuse to shag!) Then a miracle happened - Tom was signed up by a major record label, the new record and supporting tour were cancelled as a result and tonight is the rearranged date - all original tickets are still valid and we didn't throw them away. Hence, I'm stupidly excited, babbling on about anything and everything because of my excitement and my baby's finding it all very amusing; he's seen me like this on numerous occasions - The Big Pink and Bloc Party gigs in particular, he's used to it now but he still finds it very funny.

We're out of here boys and girls, have a great Saturday night whatever you find yourself doing and if you're going to do someone make sure he's cute and sexy just like my baby; although you can't have him - he belongs to me. Lots of love xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

Round and round

2010-02-25T17:54:00.000Z

I'm posting early tonight boys and girls because if I post later, well it's just going to follow the same path that many of my previous posts have; that and the fact that this keeps my mind occupied - trust me my mind needs occupying. If you've not guessed my baby is due around shortly, we're back together after two nights of enforced separation and it's strange. You see the two nights we've spent apart, I was already aware that we wouldn't be together, so I was prepared for it and I just got on with life normally. Today though, knowing that I'd be seeing my baby tonight, I've been feeling so stupidly horny again and there's only been one thing on my mind - getting naked with my baby and getting shagged rotten (that's two things isn't it? But they both relate to the same thing - sex, so I guess it can be counted as one.)

I'm not joking, that's all that's been on my mind all day, along with tons of other dirty thoughts that I'm not going to share with you, I'll save them for later when I'm with my baby! It's that bad, I'm sure I need therapy, I'm sure I've got some kind of sex addiction - he's called my boyfriend, dear me he makes me so horny; but joking aside it's crazy. I mean I've never had so much sex in my life than I have with my baby - night after night after night but the more I get the more I seem to want. When I was single I sometimes used to survive for weeks without sex if I was working without a weekend off or I couldn't arrange a hook up on the internet and I wasn't as horny as I am now, when I literally get laid to my hearts content.

I guess it's because I adore my boyfriend - I love him to bits, I lust for him with a passion because he turns me on so much and we have the most heavenly sex life - he does things to me and makes me feel things that I don't even begin to understand; I've never had so much pleasure through sex in my life than with my baby. But still that doesn't explain why all I've wanted to do of late is to be treated like a whore and get shagged hard, rough and dirty; for some reason it just blows my mind to bits at the moment. There's no explanation for that, we've not been watching porn or anything like that where such thoughts may have emanated, it's just, I honestly don't know. Not that I complain nor does it worry me and nor does my baby complain - he's more than qualified and equipped to carry out the job with aplomb.

Perhaps we're just lucky, at the end of the day that's probably all it is; I mean we've been together almost a year now officially as boyfriends and we still lust and love each other so much that it makes us feel like this. I guess you could search for a lifetime and never find that special someone who fulfils all the ideals you hold as an individual; and maybe that's why people of all sexualities shag around so much? It's so easy to call them sluts, I've been called it on more than one occasion - sometimes in jest and sometimes not; but maybe they're just still searching for that special someone. My baby and I didn't fall on our feet overnight; and truth be told we both slept around and I certainly wasn't looking for a boyfriend but it just kind of happened, something clicked into place and we jumped off the merry go round. I thought I was happy on the merry go round, I was wrong..............

Cheese

2010-02-24T20:41:00.002Z

It's been a beautiful day blogger friends, just beautiful - it's felt like Spring today and although it may only be a brief respite from Winter, it was very much welcome. The day started off overcast and cold but come the afternoon the clouds disappeared to reveal bright blue skies and brilliant sunshine. It warmed up too as the day went on and became really mild, if you were stood in the sunshine, as I was, it was just like a Spring day. Such weather just makes you feel better, it cheers up the heart and soul - to be blinded by a low sun or to look up and see nothing but blue, you cannot help but feel alive.

I phoned my baby up late afternoon whilst I was walking about because I just felt so alive and I needed to share the moment with someone; and he was the first person that sprang to mind, he was the only person I wanted to speak to. I didn't have a great deal to say but I just needed to share the moment - the warmth, the sunshine, the blue skies and the happiness inside; I love doing stuff like that when we're not together, it's just so twee to ring him up and share something so innocuous but so special. My baby knows the small things in life blow me away but regardless of that fact he just loves to listen to the things that are on my mind, however random or silly, he always takes time out, he always encourages me to tell him everything and it makes him happy to know that I'm happy - he said that today when I phoned him, I thought it was just so selfless of him, it was a beautiful sentiment.

My baby was on my mind anyway, I don't know but days like today when the weather is beautifully sunny always bring him to mind. I guess, as I said, sunny days and blue skies make me feel so alive and free - it's the same feeling I get when I'm with my baby, that's probably why. But I was walking around work with my baby at the forefront of my thoughts with a warm, fuzzy, lovey-dovey feeling deep inside; it really was terribly gay even by my standards but nonetheless it was beautiful, I don't mind being that gay with my baby, I love him to bits and I let it show. And the days are flying by so fast, at a crazy rate of knots, I don't even believe it's Thursday again tomorrow, it's beyond belief. Only a matter of days ago I was bemoaning the fact that there were still two weeks to go before my baby and I had a weekend off together - it seemed like it would take forever to come around, now, give or take a day or two, it's only a week away and closing in so fast; that makes me so happy too, spending time with my baby always makes me happy.

Because of all this and more today has been an awesomely good day; and it showed both whilst I was in work and when I got home, man did it show when I got home. Because tonight for the first time in a long, long time I partook in a guilty pleasure - a cheese-fest if you will; tonight I played some Bon Jovi. You know what it's like - a band you shouldn't really admit to liking because lots of their songs are either middle of the road or so schmaltzy. But I just felt so happy, so carefree and so lightheaded with love that I needed a schmaltz fix, forget the middle of the road stuff, I needed heart on the sleeve baby I love you so much music. Because that's just how I was feeling - baby I love you so much xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Forever

2010-02-23T20:49:00.003Z

My baby's not with me boys and girls, so you're quite safe reading the post tonight, there'll be no references to our sex life; admittedly we've been somewhat over the top with our sex fuelled postings of late, but trust us if your sex life was as good as ours you'd blog about it too! I'm not bragging either, it's not a case of our sex life is better than yours but it is a case of sex between me and my boyfriend is awesomely fantastic, like we we're meant for each other, that's all. I mean I hope that you all have extraordinary sex lives too, there's nothing more life affirming than good sex and whoever you do it with; as long as it's safe, consensual and legal then that's just fine with me. I take the mickey out of straight people a great deal on here, but it is just a joke, whatever floats your boat boys and girls; but a special mention to all the gay-boys out there - gay is never wrong, no matter what anyone says. I'm so lucky to be gay, I'm so glad I'm gay and I'd never want to be any different simply because making out with another guy, getting horny together, sharing a bed and having sex is the best experience in the World. Well, it's the second best experience in the World actually, the first being doing all that with a guy I love - my beautiful boyfriend; everything inclusive of sex is so much better if you have a boyfriend you love. I used to think promiscuity was the only way to have a healthy, varied and exciting sex life; it's incomparable to sharing your body with someone you genuinely love - honestly...........

Work keeps my baby and I apart tonight, as it will tomorrow night too but I'm not down spirited, far from it - my baby has left me in good spirits, with enough love and care to see me through until Thursday. If nothing else my neck, my right hip and my bum will be glad of the rest - it'll give them a couple of nights of rest and recuperation to fully recover after the hammering they've received. I'm kind of tired too so it'll be an early night tonight, going to bed to sleep will certainly make a change! Despite being apart my baby's been everywhere with me today, in spirit if nothing else - there's reminders of him everywhere; he's in my wallet, my pocket, my office, around my wrist and my finger - especially my finger, you've no idea how much it means and how comforting it is. To always have my baby and a piece of his love with me, well it just makes me feel so loved and so proud; and people have noticed and commented today - they all think it's beautiful and it is, in fact it's beyond beautiful, it's the perfect reminder...............

I told you forever, I'd love you forever xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Battered ring

2010-02-22T22:03:00.001Z

I've been hurting today boys and girls with some aches and pains that I could so easily blame on sleeping funny last night but truth be told I didn't sleep funny, I slept wrapped up in my baby's arms, my baby cuddled me to sleep - his arms wrapped around my chest, my head resting on his chest and his body snuggled up so close into mine. I've never felt so warm, so comfortable, so loved and I slept like a baby, it was the most peaceful nights sleep, it was no surprise; and it makes me want to cry - to share a bed, to fall asleep and to wake up with the most beautiful guy, it's a gift, hand on heart my life is blessed, my boyfriend, I love him to bits xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo. You know sometimes we all take things for granted but my baby he's not one of them, never and I guess that's what make makes me want to cry, to wake up next to him, I don't know, it's life affirming, life is beautiful - my baby's the sunshine in my world.

So back to my day, I've been struggling to some tune with the odd ache and pain; although I know it's got nothing to do with sleeping funny, it's got everything to do with the bed. I think I'm suffering from some sexual injuries and before you all start closing your web browsers in disgust it's got nothing to do with my bum, which is a surprise even for me. I mean it's took some serious hammering of late and I mean serious hammering, my baby and I have enjoyed gratuitous amounts of sex and well, it's been seriously hardcore; my baby's been shagging me like a whore, like the hardest banging I've ever endured. Not that I complain because it's been awesome and when we're seriously horny, as we have been, I love to be treated like a whore and my baby loves to treat me as such - it turns us on so much and just heightens the sexual tension between us, it's mind blowing; and that's something else I never take for granted, never!

My bum's never been happier, more satisfied and so full of cum in its life; that's right boys and girls my quality of life is judged solely on the intensity of the shagging my arse receives and how much cum it can hold! (That's the grossest joke ever, even by our standards, we're sorry - but it's funny isn't it? Or is it just our sense of humour? Well we think it's absolutely hilarious, my baby's just said maybe they can include it in the next national census? Oh man, stop it....) Instead I've been suffering all day with pain to my neck and to my right hip, no joke I had to take some pain killers at lunch, more for my neck ache; and it's not RSI from giving too much head - although that's a surprise too! You see whilst my baby's been shagging me like a whore he's been ragging me around the bed; and on numerous occasions my head and neck have been squashed up into the headboard and mattress at a variety of different angles and positions - at one point I was twisting my body to try and get free because the pleasure was so intense but my baby pushed my contorted body into the headboard and continued to bang me senseless. I was crushed up, my body twisted at an angle I don't even understand - certainly one we never learnt in trigonometry whilst at school, with my bodyweight kind of resting on my head and neck. It's been telling on me today but man was it worth it, dear me was it worth it.........

My right hip on the other hand is a strange one, my baby reckons I've strained it but I think he's being way too kind; I mean my legs are kind of used to being spread wide causing a bit of strain on my hips. When I'm with my baby my legs spend more time wide open then they do closed, I have to accommodate my baby in between them and they're so used to it that I don't think that's the problem; this time it could well be RSI, could you imagine going to the doctors - hello Mr Doctor I think I've got RSI in my hips because they spend so much time spread wide open so my boyfriend can shag the arse off me. That's one thing you'll probably never hear in a doctors surgery and you certainly won't hear it from me because can you imagine the cure - well, stop having sex Mr gay-boy, like WHAT? I'll live with the pain thank you very much! Joking aside I don't think it's that, I know exactly what it is - with shagging me hard and rough my baby's literally been bouncing off my outstretched legs and upturned bum; with all his weight and momentum crashing down on me at some speed it's taken its toll, it has to be that, he's been thrusting away like a boyfriend possessed! Have I learned my lesson........?

In a word - no, I was so horny again this afternoon that I couldn't wait to get home and get shagged like a whore again; why does hot, dirty sex always make you want more and more? I mean I was in a bit of pain but not that much pain; and as soon as we started kissing, touching and undressing each other the pain seemed to miraculously disappear. Which was a good job really because my baby didn't go any easier on me, it was a very good job, he always does a very job...........

Flirt

2010-02-21T20:47:00.000Z

It's official boys and girls, well it's always been official truth be told, it's a very well known fact but as it was pointed out to me today I thought I'd make it official to the world and admit that I AM A FLIRT. Which is hardly ground breaking news to those that know me personally because it is a very well known fact, I'm terrible, honestly I can't help myself and every now and then it causes my baby to tell me off. Not that I flirt to upset my baby nor do I flirt in the hope of getting laid because I've no reason to do it for such reasons - I only want to make my baby happy and I don't need nor do I want to get laid by anyone else but him; I love my baby to bits. I don't know but I guess it's inbuilt into me and it's more mischievous than anything else but I honestly can't help it. I know my limits though, it's very rare I flirt with gay-boys (although my baby's disagreeing with me here, okay sometimes I do it for a laugh or sometimes if we're out at night in a club or bar my friendly advances may be mistaken by the other party. But in my defence whenever that happens, I'm always with my baby and we make sure that they know we're boyfriends) but I flirt all the time with straight boys and girls; I just find it so funny and that's all it is, my mischievousness. I mean that really is harmless fun, I've got nothing to gain by flirting with them, straight boys and girls are not my cup of tea, man I don't even drink tea!

So today was a boring Sunday at work but I brightened the day up by flirting via text messages with my boyfriend and girlfriend; gosh it was such fun and well it started off with my baby. In one of my messages I referred to him as boyfriend silky sexy pants, which I thought was just so cute and kind of funny too; so I tried it out on girlfriend - girlfriend silky sexy pants, I just love the terminology and it kind of stuck. Now I call my baby such because I know he wears silky sexy pants, I want him to wear silky sexy pants, I love him to wear silky sexy pants and I've bought him many a pair of silky sexy pants - you get the picture, right? But I've absolutely no idea what kind of pants girlfriend wears, she may wear silky sexy pants, she looks the type to wear silky sexy pants (I don't know what that statement means - oh, she looks the type to wear silky sexy pants; how can you tell? Perhaps it's a straight thing, perhaps straight guys can tell what kind of pants a girl's wearing, perhaps it's a straightdar? Excuse us a minute - straightdar, oh gosh that's funny, I'm going to use that again...) and despite my best attempts to flirt my way into her pants - it's just not happening. Girls do not appear to be as easy as boys in this respect, they're kind of hard work although my baby's just reminded me that I shouldn't judge others by my standards (and he's finding that statement very funny, funnier than it should be) like you needed dragging into bed when we first met babes? Like we never had sex on our first date babes? Like it was even a date? We met purely for sex and you instigated it if memory serves correct? Oh gosh my baby's gone quiet, I wonder why? He's not really we're laughing together now but I'm so glad that it's worked out the way it has, I still remember the first message he sent me, if it wasn't for that maybe we'd have never met. Oh gosh, I'm feeling all sentimental now...........

But today I almost cracked it, seriously, girlfriend succumb to my flirtations and wants me to see her off with a bang - I almost died; these are the dangers of flirting boys and girls, be warned! Not that there's anything up with her, she's a mighty fine sexy girlfriend, but me? Like what do you do? I mean she's got bits missing and bits extra (well at a guess!); and the bits that are missing are kind of important. That's what I'm interested in and truth be told she's a girl - girls don't make me horny; but there was a saving grace, I think she was only joking and besides there's a cure for such misunderstandings, you can get it from Boots! (Oh my gosh, that could be the funniest joke ever told and no one but my baby, my girlfriend and I will get it!) On the other hand the flirtations with my baby paid off and we're very real, he wasn't joking.............

He got me so horny, seriously and I spent the remainder of my afternoon with nothing but him and the promises he made me on my mind - all afternoon I was thinking of nothing more than getting laid, more than normal it was that bad! My baby picked me up from work and when we got home, well my baby gave me a helping hand in removing my work clothes - they ended up all over the bedroom floor. I kid you not when I say we make each other so ridiculously horny, we we're both so desperate for sex that it was like we'd been starved of it for months; it's like we're possessed, but man is it good. Dear me, I would love to go into so much detail but I'm going to practice some self control, suffice to say that I was teased and pleased with fingers and a vibrator before my baby shagged me into submission; oh my gosh my bottom has never been abused so much in it's life, it was beyond sex; and according to my baby it was the most beautiful sight in the world, it was certainly the best feeling in the world.

Cum dumpster

2010-02-20T22:28:00.001Z

Baby's back! Oh my gosh, I'm back in the arms of my beautiful boyfriend, cuddled up on the sofa and smothered in kisses; whatever's been on my mind whilst we've been apart has been forgotten about. The only truth in this world and the only thing that matters is LOVE; and I see it every time I look into my baby's eyes, it's a reminder of everything that's good and no matter what anyone says or does they cannot take that away from us. I go on so much about his eyes but they're just so beautifully innocent, they speak so much truth, I can see my baby's soul within them, I can see a light guiding me back home to the safety, security and warmth of his arms. They're a reflection of everything my baby is and everything I want; it's just there looking back at me, I'm very fortunate - it's no wonder I miss him so, it's no wonder I love him so................

I get lost in his eyes, lost in his touch and lost in his kiss; everything and I mean everything slipped my mind when my baby walked on through the door. Not only that but he was wearing his slippery smooth nylon track pants - what a treat for tired eyes, what a treat for any eyes and what a treat for my hands. Dear me, they fit him so well, unbelievably well and the touch of the material pressed against my skin, pressed hard against my baby's body (you may guess which part of his body, trust me it doesn't take a mathematician to work this one out!) made me rue the fact that I'd already started cooking tea. There was only thing I wanted and it's not served on a plate, well it is figuratively speaking - I mean I don't exactly have to force my baby into bed at gun point or plead with him to take some paracetamol to cure his headache (straight people you know what I'm talking about here! And you fail to comprehend why gay is good, example one has just been served - lots of sex all the time, no pleading, no buying gifts, nothing! It's a case of a kiss turns to a snog, hands start wandering, clothes start disappearing, blood flows south, an erect penis disappears into a welcoming bottom and eventually makes it all wet and gooey inside. That's it gay sex in six easy to follow steps, we should write a beginners guide to gay sex book babes; well we will when we stop laughing............ It's the wet and gooey bit that got my baby but it's true, I'm not complaining because it's the best feeling after a good long hard shagging at the hands of my baby, to feel him dumping his cum deep inside me is just pure and utter bliss - it's dirty, sweaty, cheap, slutty and I LOVE IT. It brings us together too, seriously it makes us feel closer together, by having the trust, the love and the relationship that allows us to have bareback sex; there's nothing more intimate or personal that sharing bodily fluids - that was supposed to sound romantic and I've seriously ruined it. Stop laughing babes and help me out here, oh dear me. Not that my baby would know what it's like to have a wet and gooey bottom because we've not switched in months and months, seriously I've not topped my baby since we were tested and stopped using condoms and that was so long ago that even my baby doesn't even remember! But who would want to switch when your bottom gets the shagging of its life time after time? Not me! And who would want to switch when you get to shag a pert peachy bottom to ribbons time after time? Not my baby! Although I'm somewhat disappointed that he forgot to mention tight whilst describing my bottom - the less said the better but perhaps, no we'll leave that conversation offline! And is this the longest bracketed paragraph in the World? It's gone on for ages, we've go on for ages and it's all about sex - you should be ashamed of yourself babes, leading me astray like this!) and my baby never, ever has to do anything like that to coax me into bed or wherever we find ourselves shagging. But it would have ruined tea, so we had to wait; (yes we, my baby's trying to lay the blame squarely at my feet now, like the bulge in the front of your track pants wasn't alive? Like when Frankenstein gets zapped with lightening to bring him to life in the movie. Can you imagine it babes, me running around the living room shouting IT'S ALIVE-IT'S ALIVE because my groping has gotten you hard? Oh man, that's top quality even if I do say so myself, can you see the scene in your mind babes?) we had a top tea too - chicken jalfrazi, pilau rice, garlic and coriander naan bread. Now I'm not a big indian food lover but it was awesomely good and made a serious change, perhaps it's not the best tea to eat before you have anal sex and maybe that's why it was hotter than usual babes? (Sorry, that's so gross but it is a joke, I promise it's a joke! Not that it's stopped us from eating the carpet and that's not a joke, we've been in absolute bits here - why are the grossest jokes the funniest?) You know I've just read the post through again and it started off so heartfelt and innocent, how did it come to this? And more pointedly where will it end?

But the sex was worth waiting for; the waiting time and the time we've been apart this week made us both stupidly horny. To feel my baby's smooth nylon track pants between my outstretched thighs as I pressed him down onto me whilst we were making out was beyond belief; so what followed thereafter beggared belief. Trust me, I've never wanted cock so bad in my life, I was gagging for it and I got it, boy did I get it; my baby made an absolute mess of me, he literally shagged the arse of me it was that hard. But I needed it, we both needed it and there was one point, which I'm not even going to attempt to describe, that had me struggling for breath, seriously - it was relentless.

I love my baby - it's good to be back together again, it's good to be smiling, it's good to be laughing, it's good to be in love, it's good to have sex and it's good to be his cum dumpster. Goodnight xxxxxxxxxxx.

Hold on

2010-02-19T22:01:00.000Z

We're getting there boy and girls, it's felt like much longer than it has been because it's only been three days, but three days is a long time to be apart from the guy I love, it feels like an eternity. Still good things come to those who wait and tomorrow the wait will be over, it's less than 24 hours now and I'll be back in the arms of my baby. Gosh how I've missed him, apart from the fact that work has been treating me indifferently and perhaps that's made me need him more than ever of late, life just isn't the same when he's not within it. I miss his smile, his eyes, his kisses, his cuddles, his words, his everything; I miss him more than you'll ever understand, but my baby understands - I told him, I tell him all the time when we're apart, each and every conversation or text message, I tell him. I never used to like doing that, telling him I missed him, not because I didn't want to show my weaknesses but I didn't want him to feel any pressure, like he had to be with me all the time, or respond to my every call. It's funny how time changes people and their perceptions and now I don't think twice about telling him how much I miss him, my baby says it's another way of telling someone you love them - it's so true and well, for him to think of it like that is so sweet.

With the light shining brightly at the end of the tunnel I'm feeling much better now, sometimes I'm guilty of letting the bigger picture take me over - it's another two weeks until our next weekend off together, it's been playing heavy on my mind, it's a long time, too long. I should just take one day at a time, life's easier to swallow in bite sized chunks - my baby reminded me of this tonight, it's easier to hold onto one day at a time; it's easier to hold onto the day when you know there's someone out there that loves you.............

For my boyfriend, I love you to bits xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Sexorcist

2010-02-18T21:35:00.000Z

And I'm not joking boys and girls - I need sex urgently, not because I'm overly horny, well no more than normal but because I've got way too much excess energy. Seriously, I've got way too much energy and it's been manifesting itself in ugly ways - I need my baby to rattle my bones to some tune to help calm me down; at times like these he's like the preacher from the Exorcist, except our movie would be kind of adult orientated - the Sexorcist. My beautiful boyfriend coming to save me from the evils of my own devilment and saving my soul by shagging the arse off me and filling me with holy semen! I know he'd do that for me because I've just finished speaking to him on the phone and it kind of wormed its way into our conversation but work, well it keeps us apart once more; my baby's told me to keep out of trouble until Saturday until we're back together again. It's fine advice actually because I know that if I continue with my current devilish ways I'll fall hard and get hurt - it always happens, I know that and my baby knows that; hence his words of wisdom.

I could plead it's not really my fault but it is - works just been winding me up again today; and as a result I have been somewhat aggressive and very much grumpy - I'm such a nice person to be around at the moment. It's the 9 o'clock starts that's the root of the problem - I come into work still with my very early morning head on, needing time and space but by that time everyone else is in work and it's full on right from the word go. That's not me boys and girls, I don't operate like that, it's rare I operate at all in the first hour or two after waking up; and even less so if I wake up alone because if I'm with my baby, he just eases me gently into the day with a kiss, a cuddle and some kind words - I miss that when he's not with me. Man, I just miss him period when he's not with me and that's the other reason why 9 o'clock starts are no good; late starts mean late finishes and late finishes often mean no boyfriend - you see they're evil!

Anyway, as a result of this I was somewhat delicate upon my arrival at work; and I started the day by slamming doors in my office because someone had moved the mug my baby had bought for me. I cherish that mug, seriously, it's like an extension of my baby - I protect, care and love that mug as if it were my baby; so to find it had been moved seriously wound me up. It wasn't a good start and it only got worse when a colleague decided to wind me up over my ice watch I think, I think because I cannot honestly recall. As soon as the intention of his conversation had registered the red mist descended and the expletives fell from my mouth - it still winds me up actually, how I abhor with a passion those that judge me - narrow minded pieces of trash. It set me up for the day but instead of letting it drag me down I kind of fed off the nervous energy and I had some fun being grumpy and indifferent. It's not a good place to be, truth be told, as my baby says I need to calm down some otherwise I'll hit the ground hard..............

I'll try my very best to get through tomorrow unscathed because after that I'll be back on early starts and back with my baby. Besides if I do fall there's one guy that has to pick up the pieces and I don't want that because he doesn't deserve it; out of anyone in the World he's the one person that I wouldn't wish it on. It's a promise to my baby, I only want our time together to be filled with happiness and love, lots of love, I love my baby lots, I love him to bits xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Shine

2010-02-17T22:19:00.000Z

It always happens doesn't it? I mean you can always guarantee that when I need my baby after having a particularly bad day we won't be together because work keeps us apart. We were together for nigh on two weeks and those two weeks were so relaxing and blissful - everything both in and outside of work was pretty much perfect. The first night we're apart and it all falls to pieces, you really couldn't script it any better; not that either of us really want to script any bad times or unhappiness. That said, I am guilty of being somewhat of a drama queen in reference to it all falls apart, it really wasn't that bad..............

I don't know, work really wasn't that bad and no one in particular has upset me - I wasn't feeling upset; there just seemed to be a great deal of negativity in the air and I mean serious negativity. I guess it's the flip side of the coin in some respects because I am very sensitive to such feelings around me; thankfully for the most part I feel the positivity and I do genuinely feed off that positive energy. But today, it's been non stop negativity, like a heavy shroud hanging over my head and it's not my negativity but the air of it surrounding me - does that make sense? I could feel it, it was so heavy and I tried my best to fight it but eventually it got to me slightly - it kind of tainted my day a little and I ended up feeling negative myself; and it showed, I don't hide my feelings well at all.

There was lots of stuff going on that contributed to this, it wasn't any one major thing but lots of little things, still you add them up and they all equate the same. I guess what made it worse was the fact that I've been chained to my desk more than I like the past week or so - I abhor being chained down, I'm a free spirit and it just feels like my wings have been clipped. And with being stuck to my desk I was unable to get out and about, to find some breathing space and some time to clear my head and escape the negativity. I handled myself very well, I didn't let myself go too much and as soon as I felt I couldn't take any more I got up and went out, disregarding whatever crap that needed to be done in the office. Still it was a crap day and I was in desperate need of a familiar, friendly face to comfort me and more importantly someone with a positive outlook on life to help me forget all the negativity that surrounded me. Despite returning to an empty home my salvation was only a phone call away................

Gosh how I love my baby, within seconds of phoning him and as soon as I heard his voice all my troubles disappeared, seriously they melted away. It was all I needed - his familiar voice, his non judgemental ear and his words of comfort and advice; I just needed to get the negativity out of my system and it worked. As mentioned, I wasn't upset or anything like that, I guess I just needed re-energising, to have some distraction for my thoughts and feelings, and to have someone make me laugh. My baby did it all, we talked about my day and how it had affected me but within minutes we were talking about something completely different and we were laughing. It was like a breath of fresh air, like the sunshine breaking through the clouds on a grey overcast day and warming the soul - it was such a relief.

I said somewhere on here that if I shine brightly it's because of the love that has been bestowed upon me - it's nothing but the truth; but somehow today whilst away from my baby I lost that light. It's not a coincidence that tonight he made me shine again..........

Tosser

2010-02-16T20:17:00.002Z

It's a cheap shot admittedly, an unbelievably cheap shot but I just couldn't help myself, when a situation arises where I can get away with using such a word you can count on me to use it! Anyway, it's okay boys and girls no one and nothing has upset me, you still find me in a super relaxed frame of mind, and I don't use the word in its derogatory term. In fact I use the word to describe my baby, and no we've not fallen out or had an argument, far from it because my baby is with me again tonight - we've spent almost two weeks together, although that will soon end, tomorrow will find us apart as work once again gets in the way. Not that we complain, we've had a blissful two weeks together, we've been very fortunate, it's just been great.........

I use the word because it's pancake day and it brings back so many memories for the both of us - of our Mum's homemade pancakes, of the utter excitement having pancakes on pancake day brings - it's kind of strange when you think on it because you can have pancakes at anytime of the year for any occasion; but for some unknown reason they're reserved solely for pancake day. Maybe that's where all the excitement came from, who knows? But it's been many a year since I've had homemade pancakes, in the past I've always cheated and got the ready made ones from the supermarket and it's just not the same - the taste, the smell of them cooking and the whole spectacle, it's lost. I should have paid more attention as a child, I should have learnt from my Mum and figured out how to make my own pancakes; to recreate the magic of pancake day. I didn't but someone did.............

Now I absolutely love my baby to bits for everything he is but if there was ever a reason needed to love him even more, if that's at all possible, it's because he has the knowledge to make homemade pancakes. I kid you not, my baby paid attention when his Mum was in the kitchen - not only is he cute, loving, caring, kind, considerate, funny, a sex-god, an orgasm machine and a million and one other things but he can also cook pancakes from scratch - am I the most fortunate boyfriend in the World? Boys and girls I think the answer to that is YES! Oh my gosh, I was sat in the kitchen transfixed, watching my baby mixing all the ingredients into a smooth mixture, I think it was one of the few times I've been silent for so long whilst with my baby. He was chatting away and I was just sat there listening and watching him concentrate so intently; I guess I was overly quiet because he turned and asked if I was alright, hand on heart I never felt better - it was one of those moments, a moment of pure beauty encapsulated in the everyday, it was astonishingly beautiful.

As were the pancakes, they were absolutely gorgeous, I honestly had forgotten how good homemade pancakes were. They were that good that, if my memory serves correct, they were as good as my Mums, and I don't use that comparison lightly - they were as good as any I've tasted. What a taste sensation, after I took my first bite my baby asked if they were good, I literally could have cried - all his time, effort and attention that had gone into making them and he still wanted to make sure I was satisfied. Not only that but all those memories from childhood really did come flooding back - hot pancakes, sugar and lemon; I guess they're sense memories or something but it's strange how certain foods hold such memories. And as ever when my baby or I cook for each other, there were way too many; well there wasn't really I don't think either of us could tire from eating pancakes. But we had them for dessert - we had bacon and mushroom tagliatelle with garlic bread for tea and I made loads of that too, either one of them would have sufficed but to have both has made us more than a little full.

Whatever, we're now well and truly refuelled; and I'm sure any extra calories we may have incurred this evening will be put to good use and duly burnt off. Because whilst my baby and I are together pancakes are the only things he has to worry about tossing, everything else takes care of itself.........

El amor no tiene ningún lenguaje

2010-02-15T20:38:00.000Z

I'm so relaxed Blogger friends, you wouldn't believe how relaxed a guy could be, seriously - I'm so relaxed I'm almost horizontal; and you may all be thinking that's not unusual to find me in the horizontal position, but even out of the bedroom, even walking around and even at work when I'm away from my baby I'm almost horizontal. I don't recall any other time when I've been this relaxed and comfortable, it is just the most beautiful frame of being to find myself in; well both of us really because when I'm in such a state it has a positive effect on my baby and our relationship. I know, even without my baby saying, that I'm good to be around during such times, it's me at my very best and without anything to bother or upset me, well the light comes shining through into my life but more importantly it shines through onto my baby. Times like these are my thank you, I love you message to him - spoken in silence because no words are needed, he only has to be around me to know; and he knows...................

He knows but won't admit that I am what I am at this moment in time because of him, because of the positive input he has given my life, because of the love, the care and the tenderness he has given me; my life has been enriched by his presence within it. And yes, I know it takes two; and yes, I wouldn't have grown without some effort and trust on my behalf but first of all you have to find a boyfriend who's willing to invest the time and the effort. I've never said I was the easiest person in the world to get on with and get to know personally because that would have been a lie so it makes it all the more remarkable. I don't know and I don't care to analyse the situation because it doesn't matter; all that matters is the here and now, and right now I, sorry we, find ourselves in such a beautiful position - it's like the safest, most comfortable place you could imagine. My baby's reminding me that I've given so much to his life too, that it's not just a one-way road, and I know that to be true but without his initial time and patience none of this would have happened - that's all I'm trying to say, is that okay babes? Yes, that's okay boys and girls, trust me it's okay..........

I tell you all this not only because I want to and because my defences are down but because it's a perfect reflection of our weekend. We went out for a meal on Saturday night to the gay village, a kind of birthday/valentines joint celebration and it was just so blissful and so romantic. There were no drunken over the top antics to be found, we were impeccably well behaved - just my baby and I enjoying each others company, fine food, a few drinks and the nighttime; that was it, the most important thing was being together, nothing more. We didn't even party afterwards, we just stayed in the bar and relaxed together, we went home relatively sober and at a decent time. I bought my baby a rose on the way back home, a street vendor was selling them and I couldn't help myself; my baby took it to work today and placed it on his desk so it would remind him of me - that's just a beautiful sentiment. Sunday I returned from work to find my baby cooking a meal for us, a valentines meal; and despite having to spend our first Valentines Day apart, the nighttime more than made up for it. Once again it was just about us - a night filled with hushed tones, kisses and cuddles - the sweetest, most heartfelt things are often said in hushed tones, if they need to be said at all because love has no language. Te quiero novio xoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxox.

Be........

2010-02-14T21:09:00.003Z

I ♡ my boyfriend

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My boyfriend ♡ me

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♂ + ♂ = ♡

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Happy Valentines Day 2010

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xoxoxoxo

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Everyday is incomplete until you walk in the room......